Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Marriage Of The Undead
    (1,877 thumbs up)
  • November Theme Of The Month: I Don't Work Here!
    Submit your story today!

    Category: Crazy Requests

    Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

    Trying To Put Her Stamp On Christmas

    | England, UK | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (It is close to Christmas. We sell postage stamps, but as we are not a post office we only sell them in books.)

    Customer: “Hi. I’ve got these Christmas cards to post. I need fourteen stamps, please.”

    Me: “That’s fine. I have books of 6 first-class or 12 second-class.”

    Customer: “14 second-class then, please.”

    Me: “I’m sorry. We only sell second-class stamps in books of 12.”

    Customer: “Yes. I need 14 stamps, please.”

    Me: “Okay. So, 2 books of second-class stamps will be [amount].”

    Customer: “What! That seems a lot of money for 14 stamps.”

    Me: “No, madam. That is for 24 stamps. We only sell them in books of 12.”

    Customer: “But I only want 14!”

    Me: “We are not a post-office, madam. We only sell stamps in books of 6 first-class or 12 second-class. In order to get 14 stamps you will have to buy two books. Will you not be able to use the rest at a later date? If it’s a real problem there is a post office just around the corner which will be open in the morning.”

    Customer: “No. I need 14 stamps”.

    (This goes on for some time. She eventually twigs, and buys one book of 12 stamps. We saw her talking to a colleague of ours outside. It turns out she was setting off to walk three miles to drop off the other two cards so she didn’t need the postage! This was about three weeks before Christmas. Goodness knows why she couldn’t wait for the post office to open.)

    Milking The Holidays For All Their Worth

    | Kent, England, UK | Crazy Requests, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    Customer: *looking at store times* “So you’re closed Christmas Day and Boxing Day?”

    Me: “Yeah.”

    Customer: “So your manager thinks it’s acceptable for you to close Christmas Day and Boxing Day? One day just isn’t enough for you greedy swines? What if I, say, need some milk?”

    Me: “Don’t worry. I will leave my family and come serve you your milk.”

    Customer: “So you should.”

    Wish They Would Make Like A Tree And Leave

    | Mobile, AL, USA | Crazy Requests, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (A customer and his wife approach the service counter.)

    Customer: “Hey. Can you get someone out to the Christmas trees? We want one cut.”

    Me: “Sure! There actually should be someone out there, but he may have stepped inside or something. I’ll call him right up for you.”

    Customer: “Well, he’s not out there!”

    Me: “Okay. No problem. But I know they’re still closed out there. Do you want to go ahead and buy a tree, so you don’t have to come back in and buy it?”

    Customer: “No! I just want a tree!”

    Customer’s Wife: “Yes. Maybe about six feet.”

    Me: “Oh, okay.”

    Customer: “No. Just get someone out there to cut trees.”

    Me: “Yes, sir.”

    (As I call the manager who’s supposed to be cutting the trees, the customer walks away in a huff.)

    Customer: *sarcastically* “Great customer service!”

    (I talk to the manager on the phone and note that the customer’s wife is still there.)

    Customer’s Wife: *to my coworker* “Can you call me a manager?”

    Coworker: “Oh, of course.”

    Customer’s Wife: “And YOU! That was very rude! I’ve worked years of retail, and I’ll have you know that rolling your eyes at a customer and back-talking is not acceptable!”

    (I am stunned, but I know better than to argue with her.)

    Me: “Apologies, then. I hadn’t realized I’d done either.”

    Customer’s Wife: “Well, you’ve been very rude! This is not the attitude of someone working in retail!”

    Me: “I’m very sorry. I meant no offence.”

    (At this point, the manager arrives.)

    Manager: “Hello. What’s the problem?”

    Customer’s Wife: “I have a complaint about this little girl!”

    Manager: *incredulously* “[My Name]?”

    Customer’s Wife: “Yes. She rolled her eyes at me! And said ‘yes, sir’ to my husband! And was just very flippant!”

    Manager: “Well, ma’am, I shall certainly do something to correct the problem. Sorry for the inconvenience.”

    Customer’s Wife: “Thank you!”

    (The customer’s wife walks away in a huff. The manager shakes her head. The manager turns to me, and I explain what happened. My manager turns to my coworker for verification.)

    Manager: “Was she rude or something?”

    Coworker: “No! She was very nice and polite, as always.”

    Manager: *to me* “Normally, if this was anyone else, I’d say something, but I can’t really get onto you for saying ‘sir.’ Maybe next time she comes in, we should be like, ‘b****, there’s your tree!’”

    Wouldn’t Know Fun If She Drove Into It

    | USA | Crazy Requests, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (We are having an annual Christmas parade. It blocks a lot of traffic for about an hour. A driver pulls up to me.)

    Driver: “Excuse me. I need to drive through here. I need to get out to go do some business.”

    Me: “Sorry. The parade is going on right now. You can go the other direction but it’s not safe for you to go this way.”

    Driver: “I have a business to run. This is a business street. If you guys want to have fun you need to go find a fun street and not have fun on our business street!”

    Will Not Leave On The Eve

    | Ocean, NJ, USA | Crazy Requests, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (It is Christmas Eve. The store is closing early because of the holiday. The people on the sales floor have herded the last shoppers to the registers. The manager is standing by the door with his keys, and at 2 pm on the dot he locks the entrance door. A customer RACES up and gets inside by ducking through the cart door.)

    Manager: “Sir, we are closed.”

    Customer: “I’m inside the store! You have to let me shop!” *starts to walk around the manager*

    Manager: *sidesteps to stay in front of the customer* “No. I do not. The store is closed, the doors are locked, there is no one on the sales floor to help you, and the registers will be shut down remotely by corporate in less than fifteen minutes.”

    Customer: “Tomorrow’s Christmas. I need to buy presents for my family! The customer is always right!”

    Security: *right behind the manager, grinning* “We have you on camera forcing your way into a closed store. It would make my day if you tried something. I wouldn’t even mind spending Christmas Eve at the police station.”

    Manager: “We are closed. There are no customers in the store when we are closed.”

    (The manager and guard stand shoulder to shoulder and walk towards the man, forcing him to back out the exit door. The customers in line are entertained enough to be relaxed instead of stressed, and we cashiers finish the shift in a GREAT mood. Best Christmas Eve shift, EVER.)

    Page 86/159First...8485868788...Last