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  • Had It Up To Their Neck With Bad Customers
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    Category: Crazy Requests

    Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

    Needs To Go To 911, 101

    | SC, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid

    Me: “911, what’s the address of your emergency?”

    Caller: “I need the number for the phone company.”

    Me: “Ma’am, this is 911. Do you have an emergency?”

    Caller: “I need the number for the phone company!”

    Me: “Okay, so just to clarify: you do not have an emergency at this time?”

    Caller: “No.”

    Me: “Okay, ma’am. Call me back at this number and I’ll see what I can do to help you.”

    (At this point I gave her the non-emergency number and she hung up. I grabbed the phone book while I waited on her to call back.)

    Me: “This is the [City] Police Department. How can I help you?”

    Caller: “Yes, I need the number for the phone company.”

    Me: “Okay, ma’am. I’ve got the phone book in front of me now. There are three numbers listed here, which do you need? I have one for billing, one for establishing service, and one for repairs.”

    Caller: “No! I need the number for the phone company that I can call and get someone else’s phone number.”

    Me: *pause* “Do you mean 411, ma’am?”

    Caller: “Yes! That’s it! Thanks!” *click*

    Hot Coffee Is Cold Comfort

    | IL, USA | Crazy Requests

    (It is the coldest day our area has had in decades, with wind chills reaching -50. Regardless, our theater is still relatively busy.)

    Customer: *while walking the opposite direction from me down a hallway* “You should give us free popcorn or something because we came out here in this cold!”

    Me: “Sir, unlike me, you came here willingly. I’d rather be home, but I’m working because you’re here.”

    Coworker: “You should have told him that they should be bringing us free coffee for having to deal with them!”

    More Money, More Problems

    | New Zealand | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Family & Kids, Money

    (I work for a cinema that has a gaming area attached to it. All the games run on coins only, and there are signs up everywhere stating this. I am the person working in the Games Zone today, and am currently patrolling around the area for game faults or shady characters. A woman with two children approach me.)

    Patron: “Excuse me, miss?”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am?”

    Patron: “Your game is broken. I am very upset. My children really wanted to play on this but it won’t accept our money! It just ate the money and gave us no game!”

    Me: “Oh, I’m sorry to hear that. Sometimes the games do eat the coins. I’ll just fetch some tokens and come over to see if I can get it working.”

    Patron: “Well, hurry up! We have a movie starting soon but they really want to play this game first! We don’t have all afternoon!”

    (I return to my booth to collect a couple of tokens to put in the machine, to see if I can get the game running. When I return to the game the woman has already seated her children in the seats, in a way that I cannot get to the coin slot.)

    Me: “‘Scuse me kids. I just need you to move for a moment.”

    Patron: “What are you doing? Kicking my kids off the game?!”

    Me: “No. They are in the way of the coin slot, so I can’t put the tokens in. I just need them to shift for a moment.”

    Patron: “Geez, just lean over! You’re tall, even I can do that!”

    (She snatches my bag of tokens from my hand and gets a few out. She practically smothers her children as she leans over to reach the coin slot, violently jamming the token in. It is obviously not going to go in, as something clearly is blocking it.)

    Me: “Ma’am, I just need you to stop trying to shove the token in. Something is blocking the way. I think the money you put in before might have jammed up inside. I just need your kids to move and I’ll see if I can clear it.”

    (She scoffs at me and mutters about how stupid the game is, but makes her kids move. I lean down to inspect the coin slot and to my surprise, find a $5 note folded up and jammed in the slot. After a little bit of wriggling I manage to pull it out.)

    Me: “Um, did you fold up a note and put it in here?”

    Patron: “Yes, that’s mine!”

    Me: “Well, that is the problem. The machines only take coins, not notes. The slot doesn’t accept bills of any sort.”

    Patron: “Well that’s stupid! Anyway, I did put coins in. I put two $1 coins in, and they wouldn’t go all the way through, so I thought it must take notes instead!”

    (I inspect the coin slot again, and after a little wriggling with a key, manage to spot two coins that she has pushed in TOGETHER at the same time, which became wedged. The note had wedged them further down the slot, so I cannot get them out.)

    Me: “Well, I’m afraid the coins are well and truly stuck in there now. I cannot get them out and no other coins can get past. Your kids can’t play the game today.”

    Patron: “What? Well that is f****** ridiculous! We paid money for this game, it’s still running. Just credit it a game or something by opening up the computer slot or something!”

    Me: “I just give out change and put up ‘Out of Order’ signs… I don’t fix games.”

    Patron: “Well, you’re useless down here then, aren’t you?!”

    Double Take Required

    | Wausau, WI, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid

    (I’m rather short, 5’3″, a bit heavy, and have short black hair and dark eyes. My coworker is lean, tall, almost 5’10″, and has red hair and hazel eyes. The only similarity we have is that we both wear glasses. Even on this day I was wear a black uniform top and she was wearing a pink one, in honor of Breast Cancer Awareness month. We just switched off so she can go home.  I hop on the register.)

    Customer: *coming up to the checkout* “I couldn’t find it. Are you sure it’s there?”

    Me: “Um, what are you looking for?”

    Customer: *getting angry* “I already told you! Did you really just forget? Honestly!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I just started my shift.”

    Customer: “No! I just talked to you! You told me where I could find this!” *thrusts a small plastic bag with a jewelry finding in it*

    Me: “Oh! Jewelry findings are the first row of jewelry and go straight back to the wall, ma’am.”

    Customer: “That’s not what you said before!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I just got here.”

    Manager: *coming up since she heard the yelling* “Is there a problem?”

    Customer: “This cashier is being rude and is lying to me!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I am sorry my coworker has told you the wrong section, but she was the one that helped you. I just started.”

    Customer: “Right there! Lying!”

    Manager: “Actually, she’s right. She did just clock in.”

    Customer: “Oh… well… You two just look so much alike!” *storms off*

    Manager: “Who did you relieve?”

    Me: “[Coworker].”

    Manager: “YOU TWO LOOK NOTHING ALIKE! AND SHE’S IN PINK!”

    The Mother Of Bad Decisions

    | SD, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Family & Kids

    (I am working at the customer service desk at the grocery store in my town. It’s about three in the afternoon, and I’m an hour into an eight-hour shift. I am alone at the front of the store, when a customer that I do not know comes up to me.)

    Me: “Hello. What can I do for you today?”

    Customer: “Hey, I need a babysitter for my kid tonight. Can you come and do it?”

    (I’m a little taken aback but give her a smile anyway.)

    Me: “Oh, I’m sorry but I am working the closing shift tonight.”

    Customer: “Great! Who is supposed to watch my kid tonight? I have very important plans!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but there’s nothing I can do to help you.”

    Customer: “Thanks a lot! You just ruined my entire night! Teenagers today are so lazy and worthless!”

    (I stare at her open-mouthed as she stomps away. A few minutes later, I see her ask another one of my coworkers, whom politely declines, because she’s also working all night. The customer rushes out of the store cussing, leaving her full cart of groceries behind.)


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