November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

Not Feeling Neutral About Your Parking

| NB, Canada | Crazy Requests, Criminal/Illegal, Transportation

(It is the day before Good Friday, and the store is packed full of people. Obviously, so is the parking lot. A cart pusher has just brought in a handful of carts, and a greeter is tagging bags. One customer, already looking angry, heads straight to the elder greeter and tries to hand her his car keys.)

Customer: “Go park my car.”

Greeter: “I’m sorry, sir, but we don’t offer a valet service here.”

Customer: “There’s no f****** parking spaces. Go park my f****** car!”

Greeter: “Sir, I just got back from work after having a heart attack. What makes you think I’m going to be able to drive your car, let alone find you a parking space, when you haven’t?”

Cart Pusher: “Where is your car right now? Parking in the fire lane makes working and shopping here dangerous. I can have you towed.”

(Customer went beet red and left, hopefully back to his car!)

Not Linked To Reality

| Europe | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Technology

Client: “This is not what we requested at all. This [document] looks exactly the same as we provided a week ago. The deadline is tomorrow, we need this ASAP! When can you apply the edits?”

Me: “[Client], there seems to be a misunderstanding. I click the link and see the entirely new document. Have you checked this [link]?”

Client: “Found it. This should have been sent sooner.”

Me: “There were three versions sent earlier during the week to your email. Did you not receive them? Just to show, I’ve attached screenshots of the timestamps and emails sent.”

Client: “I did not scroll down to see the emails in Gmail. Please notify us earlier if I haven’t seemed to have noticed the link in your opinion.”

Me: “…”

Been Ladle-fed Her Entire Life

| New Ulm, MN, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Family & Kids

(I am called over by a customer to the kitchen department.)

Customer: “I’m looking for a metal ladle. I need it to match my other utensils.”

Me: *showing her the three plastic ladles we have, no metal ones* “Sorry, it seems we only have plastic ones, not metal. You could possibly check online.”

Customer: *clearly annoyed* “No, I need a metal ladle. I don’t want to go online for any crap you’re trying to sell me.”

Me: “I’m sorry. We’re a lot smaller than other stores. We don’t have as large of a variety as the other ones do.”

Customer: “I need my ladle. You’ll order one for me and I’ll be here to pick it up in three days exactly.”

Me: “We can’t do that, ma’am. We have thing shipped to us through a system. We get bulk orders of items that the systems recognizes we need, whether we have run out or they are sent for a new season.”

Customer: “I’ll be back in three days.” *to her daughter in the cart* “The customer is always right, sweetie. You demand, and then you get. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. I’ll get my ladle and they can’t do anything about it.”

(She walked away while I tried to explain there was no way we could order one of an item, again…)

Acting Irregular Over Regular Price

| Santa Cruz, CA, USA | Crazy Requests, Holidays

(We are a discount store that never has sales because our prices are already low. This year we open on Thanksgiving evening and stay open through Black Friday, though everything is regular price. A customer walks into store about an hour after we open.)

Me: *at cash counter* “Good evening, ma’am!”

Customer: “I heard you guys are opening now and aren’t closing until midnight on Black Friday!”

Me: “Yes, we’re going to be open all night tonight and all day tomorrow.”

Customer: “Great! I’m surprised there’s nobody here. So, what are the specials?”

Me: “Well, we actually aren’t having any sales; our prices are already rock-bottom.”

Customer: *confused* “So everything is regular price?”

Me: “That is correct.”

Customer: *shouting* “Then why the h*** am I here? I should be at home spending time with my family, not wasting time shopping at full price! I only came because I thought there’d be a good sale! You wasted my time and took me away from my family!”

Me: *pointedly* “I agree. I don’t like being away from my family on holidays either. Have a nice night.”

Customer: *leaves in a huff*

The Cake Order Is A Lie

| Hamilton, ON, Canada | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(As in many establishments, whenever we answer the phone we always answer with the name of our store, and our location.)

Me: “[Restaurant], Hamilton. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, I ordered a cake from you guys and I’m supposed to pick it up tomorrow. I want some information changed with the writing on the cake.”

Me: “Okay, could you please give me your information so I can find your order sheet.”

(Customer proceeds to give me his information. We are an extremely small store and so any cake order is simply posted on a cork-board and easy to find. I cannot find his order and I start feeling anxious.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but I don’t seem to be able to locate your order sheet.”

(The customer starts getting very angry, calling us incompetent and that he specifically remembers placing this order, etc. I’m trying hard to keep it together because I am not used to people talking to me in the way this customer is. I try to see what I can do.)

Me: “Sir, if you wouldn’t mind calling me back in ten minutes, I’m going to look through the whole store to see if I can find your cake order.”

Customer: “You do that!”

(He hangs up. We have two freezers: one in the front of the store and one in the back. None of the cake orders match his description. I wait for his call back with a sinking feeling in my stomach. I answer the phone, again with the name of the store and location.)

Me: “[Restaurant], Hamilton. How can I help you?”

Customer: *angrily* “Well? Did you find it?”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, I couldn’t.”

Customer: “Well you’d better fix this because this is all your fault and you’re going to ruin my mother’s birthday and I’m coming in tomorrow and it better be done! I can’t believe this. Do you even understand how irresponsible you are? How would you feel if someone f***ed up your order?!”

Me: “I would be upset as well, sir. I understand your anger.”

Customer: *condescendingly* “Well, that’s real diplomatic of you, kid.”

(He gives me his order again, then hangs up the phone. I’m really upset now and shaky, and I should have done this before, but I page my manager. When she calls me back, I tearfully explain the whole situation and she’s thoroughly angry at this guy. She has me call the only two other locations we have to check if they have the cake order, which they didn’t.)

Manager: “Wait a minute. Just humour me and call [Famous Ice Cream Chain] and see if they have his cake order.”

(Dubiously, I call the store. Please note, the names of our stores sound NOTHING ALIKE.)

Other Store: “How can I help you?

Me: “Hi, I’m calling from [Restaurant]. I just got a call from angry customer about his cake order. Do you happen to have [Customer]’s cake order?”

Other Store: “Yup. We sure do!”

Me: “Oh, my god, I’m so mad. I’m going to call you back.”

(I hang up and then call my manager.)

Me: “He totally ordered the cake from the other store!

Manager: “I knew it! And you answered the phone with our store name, right?”

Me: “Of course. Twice!”

Manager: “Okay, this is what you’re going to do. Call the store back, tell them to make the changes, and tell them to add this note. ‘Dear, sir, we have made the necessary changes to the cake as you have requested, DESPITE the fact that you called the wrong store multiple times, and we’re extremely rude to an employee of [Restaurant]. You are never to call [Restaurant] and order a cake from us. Sincerely, [Restaurant].”

(I called the other store, explained the situation, and I dictated the note to them, which they wrote down gleefully. I never found out if they actually gave the note with the cake but we never got a call from him again. Would have loved to have been a fly on the wall when he picked up his cake!)