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    Category: Crazy Requests

    Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

    No Sub-Price For The Sub-Continent

    , | Liverpool, England, UK | Crazy Requests, Money

    (I’m having my eyebrows threaded at a beauty stand I frequent in the middle of the main thoroughfare of our local shopping mall. The business is owned and run by an Asian family, and they offer very competitive prices. They also offer threading for other facial hair. While I’m there, there are two technicians, both young Asian ladies. An older Asian man approaches Technician #1, who is working on my eyebrows, while Technician #2 is having a conversation with someone on the phone in her native language.

    Man: “How much is it to have my whole face done?”

    Technician #1: “£22.”.

    Man: “I’m Indian.”

    Technician #1: “Yes. £22.”

    Man: “What? Even for a fellow Indian?”

    (At this point, Technician #2 puts the phone down, and says something to Technician #1 in their language. The Indian man waits, expectantly. She addresses him in English.)

    Technician #2: “We’re from Pakistan. £22.”

    (The man glares and stalks off, before the two technicians burst into laughter. I ask what I’ve missed.)

    Technician #1: “We’re Indian.”

    Technician #2: “We always get these older guys trying to haggle us down ‘because we’re all Indian.’ India’s a big place, and we have a business to run!”

    Single Minded Demands

    | USA | Crazy Requests, Family & Kids, Hotels & Lodging, Wild & Unruly

    (Sometimes our sales manager gives some of her friends a certificate for a free night’s stay at our hotel. I am checking in such a stay.)

    Customer: “Hello, checking in? The name’s [Customer].”

    Me: “Right, Mrs. [Customer]. I see that this is a free night’s stay? May I see the certificate?”

    Customer: “Right here.” *hands it over*

    Me: “Okay, I see that’s in order. Here are your keys and sign here.”

    (She signs and leaves, waving goodbye. A few minutes later, she comes back with a teen girl in tow.)

    Customer: “Excuse me, but I’m supposed to have a room with two beds in it. This is a room with only one bed!”

    Me: “I’m terribly sorry; let me check the reservation again.” *checks* “Ma’am, the reservation says that a single bed was booked, not two. Furthermore, I’m afraid we don’t have any more two-bed rooms.”

    Customer: “This is outrageous! I know the owner, you know. You’re just trying to trick me, because I’m a free stay and I’m not paying!”

    Me: “I don’t see why… uh… anyone would do that.”

    (At this point, I start to get nervous, because our sales manager is married to the owner, so it is possible she’s telling the truth. Fortunately, the teen speaks up.)

    Teen: “Mom! Didn’t you say that you were going alone until I agreed to come with you at the last minute? Doesn’t it make sense then that you would book only a single bed for yourself?”

    Customer: “I… I… It must’ve slipped my mind.”

    (Caught, red-faced, she slinked off with her daughter. A few minutes later, I got a call from her room asking meekly for a cot. I got her one, and reported the incident to the managers. Soon, she is their friend no more, and I never saw her again!)

    Getting A Call From The Idiot Factory

    | USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Health & Body

    Customer: “So what’s in this supplement? I don’t want the product label; tell me what it’s MADE OF.”

    Me: *after five minutes of searching and her complaining how long it was taking* “It’s made from chicken cartilage. Is that what you were wondering?”

    Customer: “Oh, I knew that. I just wanted to know if you knew.”

    Me: “…”

    Customer: “So, where are your factory locations? Do you work there? You better work there if you’re selling me these products.”

    Me: “Ma’am, I don’t work in the factory. I take phone call orders. We don’t release our manufacturing locations.”

    Customer: “Well, what kind of shady company are you?!” *hangs up*

    Going Gaga For Shoes

    , | ACT, Australia | Bizarre, Crazy Requests

    (A young woman comes bursting into the store, flustered. She runs around all the aisles, frantically, at least three times. I watch her and go to walk over to help her, but she beats me to it and runs straight up to me, panting, sweating, red-faced, and a look of stress in her face.)


    Me: “I’m sorry, I don’t even know where you could even buy Lady Gaga’s shoes to start with. We don’t sell them here though…”

    Customer: “UGH! Not good. Not good… I ABSOLUTELY NEED LADY GAGA’S SHOES RIGHT NOW!”

    (She then bolted out the door, as if she was running from a pack of lions. The other customers and I just stood there for a moment to take in what just happened.)

    Afraid To Be Their Guinea Pig

    | Bryan, TX, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Pets & Animals

    (I am not actually a store associate but I try to help out since I work as a vendor within the store and I have plenty of information from my veterinary college program. So, I was not really getting paid to do this.)

    Customer: “Yes. I would like to know about these gerbils. I want a pet for my daughter. She just turned six.”

    Me: “Well, ma’am, gerbils tend to bite if not handled properly.”

    Customer: *gasps and points to the guinea pigs* “They bite?!”

    Me: “Oh. Those are guinea pigs. And no those don’t usually bite.”

    Customer: “Oh, guinea pigs.”

    Me: “So were you interested in getting one?”

    Customer: “Yes.”

    (She starts asking about all the information on guinea pigs, which is on the info card right under the aquarium at eye level. Shrugging it off, I answer her questions.)

    Me: “Anything else?”

    Customer: “Which one is the healthiest?”

    Me: “Uh. All of them.”

    Customer: “Okay. But which one is the healthiest?”

    Me: “Ma’am, they wouldn’t be on display if they weren’t healthy.”

    Customer: “Which is the youngest?”

    Me: “Since they came from a breeding distributor they are all the same age. Most people pick them out by what colored fur they have.”

    Customer: “Okay. But which is the youngest?”

    Me: “You’ll have to ask up front for that information.”

    Customer: “Oh, okay. I can leave one of these alone for a week?”

    Me: “… Seven days? No, ma’am. There aren’t any pets aside from some fish you could ever leave alone for that long.”

    Customer: “Oh. What if it’s just a weekend?”

    Me: “No, ma’am. If something happened to their water supply or they got hurt there would be no one there to make sure it was okay.”

    (At this point I don’t want her taking an animal due to her lack of knowledge and the potential danger the pet would be put in.)

    Me: *hands her a book on guinea pigs* “There is also plenty of information online so you can be better prepared.”

    Customer: “Okay.” *turns to her daughter* “We better just get this! It’s a lot more work than we thought for your first pet!”

    Daughter: “Second. We had a fish.”

    Customer: “Oh, yes. Second pet.”

    (I shook my head as I walked back to my store section, thinking that the fish is definitely dead.)

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