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  • Bigotry Is Not On The Menu
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  • Category: Crazy Requests

    Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

    Can’t Compete With Common Sense

    | PA, USA | Crazy Requests, Money

    (My supervisor is filling in for a cashier. A customer checking out hands him a coupon from one of our competitor stores. Corporate has recently told us we can only match it if we have a similar coupon running, which we don’t for this one.)

    Customer: “You ALWAYS take competitor coupons!”

    Supervisor: “Unfortunately, sir, we can’t honor this one.”

    Customer: “Well, what’s stopping me from taking this coupon and buying this same item from THEIR store?”

    Supervisor: “What a novel idea.”

    (The customer walked out without another word.)

    Like Their Coffee (Burnt) Black

    | Franklin Park, PA, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Health & Body

    (The property owner has come in to report that there is smoke coming from the roof of the shopping center, though not directly above our store. A few customers overhear.)

    Customer #1: “So, uh, what should we do?”

    Customer #2: “Yeah, can we still order drinks?”

    Me: “Um… well, I guess so, since we haven’t gotten an official order to evacuate.”

    (Despite the commotion, no one in the café has budged. I am in the middle of making the last customer’s drinks when the store manager comes in.)

    Manager: “Ladies, gentlemen, there is a fire in one of the electrical units on top of the building so we are evacuating. Anyone parked directly in front of the building will need to move their cars.”

    (Most people get up to leave, but a few just look around, confused.)

    Customer #3: “Can we leave our things here?”

    Manager: “No. Take all of your things. The store is closing and I have no idea when we will be able to reopen.”

    Customer #2: “Well what should I do?!”

    Manager: “You have to leave. We’ve been given official orders to get everyone out.”

    Customer #2: “But I’ve already paid for those! I don’t have my drinks yet!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I will finish making these drinks, but I am leaving directly after and you will need to do the same.”

    (Even as fire trucks begin to arrive and people file out, a few people wander in.)

    Customer #4: “Are you still open?”

    Me: “No! We are evacuating the building, there is an electrical fire on the roof!”

    (They leave, obviously displeased. I hand off the drinks I was working on and run out. Amazingly, many of the people who were in our cafe are standing around, a few asking if we think we’ll reopen soon. Luckily, the fire was quickly put out, no one was hurt, and the damage was mostly cosmetic. The next day, the same woman who wouldn’t leave without her drinks comes in.)

    Customer #2: “I was here when we had to evacuate yesterday! Was everyone all right?”

    Me: “Yes, everyone is fine. They got the fire put out pretty quickly and none of the stores have major damage.”

    Customer #2: “Well I’m just glad to hear no one was hurt. You guys are more important than coffee.” *walks away*

    (A coworker, who hadn’t been working during the evacuation, looks touched.)

    Coworker: “That was so nice! What a sweet thing to say.”

    Me: “Yeah… just wish she had felt that way yesterday when she wouldn’t let me leave until her lattes were finished.”

    Coworker: “…oh.”

    Has A Cat’s Chance In Hell Of Adopting

    | Kearney, NE, USA | Crazy Requests, Pets & Animals, Theme Of The Month

    Me: “Hello! Are you interested in finding a pet today?”

    Customer: *with young son* “Yes. I would like to adopt two cats.”

    Me: “That’s fantastic! We have many to choose from.”

    Customer: “Too bad my landlord won’t let me have more than one pet at my apartment.” *handing me her phone* “Here’s a picture of my son’s cat.”

    Me: “You already have a pet?”

    Customer: “Yep.”

    Me: “And you want to adopt two more?”

    Customer: “Yes.”

    Me: “But your landlord says you can only have one animal in your home?”

    Customer: “Oh, the two cats I adopt here won’t live with me! My father just passed away and his house is lonely so they’ll live there.”

    Me: “I’m so sorry to hear about your father, but we can’t do an adoption for cats to live alone in a house.”

    Customer: “Why not?”

    Me: “Because we want to make sure that the animals would be properly cared for and if no one lives with them they could run out of food and water or get trapped during an emergency and you might not know about it for days.”

    Customer: “Well, I’m paying for the air conditioning to be on at his house so someone should live there!”

    Me: “Maybe you could live out the lease at your apartment then move in to your dad’s house.”

    Customer: “No, I don’t want to have to move my stuff. What if I just tell you I live there?”

    Me: “Since I already know that that is a lie, I would not feel comfortable doing the adoption.”

    Customer: “Do you even care about the animals here?!”

    Me: “Yes, that’s why I don’t want them it have to live alone in a house. They deserve to be cared for.”

    Customer: “Maybe I’ll just spend every night at the house so I know they’d be okay!”

    Me: “Would your son stay with you?”

    Customer: “No! He’s afraid of the house!”

    Me: “So, you’re willing to let your young son live alone just so you can adopt these cats?”

    Customer: “I’m gonna tell you whatever you need to hear so you’ll give me these animals!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I truly am sorry that you lost your father. But the situation you are in right now simply makes me unable to let you adopt an animal from us. If you move or can provide us with written proof that your landlord will allow more pets, come back and see what cats we have at that time.”

    Customer: “You’ll be hearing from my lawyer! You don’t even care what happens to these animals!” *storms out the door*

    Sadly This Job Isn’t Child’s Play

    | OH, USA | Crazy Requests, Family & Kids

    (I work in an arcade, which also has a kids’ gym. Right by the only entrance and exit, there is a sign which clearly says that employees are not babysitting the area, and that kids may leave without parents. However, I do try and keep the younger kids from leaving without supervision. One day I let two younger boys out to use the bathroom. Less than a minute later, their mother comes up to me.)

    Mother: “Did you see my two sons leave?!”

    Me: “Yes, I let them run to the bathroom.”

    Mother: “WHAT?! Why would you let them out?! One of them is only two!”

    Me: “Ma’am, it’s not my job to watch your kids.”


    Me: “Ma’am, please stop yelling. I did ask where they were going, and made sure they knew where the bathrooms were. I also checked that they went in the right direction.”

    Mother: “You still shouldn’t let them out!”

    Looking For A Cold Comfort

    | West Fargo, ND, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

    (It should be noted that while our drinks are normally served hot, we can also make them over ice, or blended with ice by request. On this particular day, it is -40 without wind chill and in the middle of a blizzard. All the local schools have been closed as well as the interstates and we have been rotating workers on drive due to the harsh conditions. As such, it is my turn.)

    Customer: “I would like one large [drink].”

    Me: “Sure! See you at the window!”

    (After the customer pays, I go to hand her a drink and she glares at me and snaps.)

    Customer: “It was supposed to be blended!”

    Me: “Oh, okay! We’ll remake that for you right away! Sorry, I must have missed you telling me that when I took your order!”

    Customer: “I didn’t tell you. You should just know to make it blended!”

    (The kicker? The customer was a student at the local high school, which was closed due to the blizzard. Sorry that we didn’t assume you’d want a cold drink in the -40 weather!)

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