Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

That Pizza Was All Greek To Me

| Minneapolis, MN, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

Customer: “Hi, my pizza was just delivered and it was entirely incorrect. I just gave it back to the driver and he gave my money back. But I’d like to get my correct pizza.”

Me: “Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that. Well it looks here like you ordered the Greek pizza—”

Customer: “Yeah, but the one I got had tomatoes and black olives, and green peppers, I think…”

Me: “And red sauce and onions and feta cheese?”

Customer: “Yeah!”

Me: “Yeah, that’s the Greek pizza. You got exactly what you ordered.”

Customer: “What? Well my friend just ordered from you last week and he said he got the Greek, but it was different. It had gyro meat on it and it got served with tzatziki sauce.”

Me: “Oh, your friend must have ordered our Santorini pizza. I can go ahead and change your order here and send you the right one. It costs the same price.”

Customer: “Uh… that’s it? I don’t get a discount or anything?”

Me: “Well… no. I mean… it’s your friend’s fault that he told you the wrong pizza. But you got exactly what you told us you wanted. We don’t give discounts for people who neglect to read our menu before ordering.”

Customer: “Oh. Okay. That’s fair, I guess.”

It’s No Use Lying Over Spilt Milk

| ON, Canada | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(I work at a big name coffee chain. This conversation is taking place over headsets; I’m in the back unpacking stock.)

Coworker: “Is it possible to be allergic to milk fat?”

Me: “I don’t know, maybe? Some pretty weird allergies run in my family.”

Coworker: “This customer just asked for a drink made nonfat because she’s allergic to milk fat.”

Me: “Well, if she says there’s an allergy, assume she’s telling the truth.”

Coworker: “And she wants whipped cream on it.”

Me: “…”

The Request Is Not Relative To The Situation

| UK | Crazy Requests, Technology

(I work in the admissions office.)

Caller: “Can you email me to confirm that I’ve paid the deposit?”

Me: “No problem. I’ll do it as soon as I get off the phone.”

Caller: “It’s very urgent…”

Me: “Okay, just give me a second… Right, I just wrote you an email and I’m sending it now.”

Caller: “Can I get it sooner? I don’t have much time.”

Me: “Sooner than now?”

Caller: “Yes, please.”

Giving You A Cold Reception

| OH, USA | Crazy Requests, Tourists/Travel

(I’m working in a 19th century mansion that has been turned into a museum. It’s late autumn and the house already gets very cold inside. I’m ringing up a couple for a tour.)

Customer: “Aren’t they ever opening this house for Christmas again?”

Me: “Well, it’s very difficult to hea—”

Customer: “Yes, they said something about it being hard to heat. I wouldn’t think you’d need much heat just for a tour!”

Me: “Oh, you might feel differently in December. But I also think the guides might revolt over being kept in a 50-degree house all day.”

Customer: “You’re all just lazy!” *walks away*

She Likes Piña Coladas, And Getting Sugar To The Brain

| Bar | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(I recently started bartending and learning to mix cocktails. One night a customer was unhappy with her piña colada.)

Customer: “This tastes horrible!”

Me: “I’m very sorry about that. Would it be okay if I tried the drink, to figure out what I messed up?”

(I try the drink and it tastes normal.)

Me: “Sorry, but I can’t taste the problem. I could try and make you another one, but it’ll probably taste the same. Maybe another cocktail?”

Customer: “No, I want a piña colada. What have you been putting into this?”

Me: “The usual. Ice, coconut syrup, cream, white rum, pineapple juice—”

Customer: “Why in the world would you put white rum in that?”

Me: “Because that’s the recipe? At least the one we are using here.”

Customer: “No, there’s no white rum in a piña colada. There’s piña colada in piña colada!”

(At that point I realise she’s probably used to store-bought pre-mixed drinks. I tell her that my boss will sort it out, and after talking to him, we make a drink with half the alcohol and double the syrup. Apparently that hit the spot.)

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