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    Category: Crazy Requests

    Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

    Non-Flight Risk

    | Canada | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Hotels & Lodging, Top, Tourists/Travel, Transportation

    (A passenger takes a flight from British Columbia to Newfoundland with one connection in between in Calgary. With roughly an hour to make the connection, she should have an easy time, especially since all flights are on time, and her gates are right across the room from each other. However, she misses her connecting flight. Our airline, at no additional fee, moves her to the next available flight in six hours. Within an hour or so, however, she calls our call center.)

    Passenger: “I’d like to make a complaint!”

    Agent: “Oh? I’m sorry to hear that. How can I assist you?”

    Passenger: “I’m calling because your airline made me miss my connecting flight, and would not provide me a hotel for the night.”

    Agent: “Oh, wow. I’m terribly sorry to hear that. What is your reservation code? I’ll see if I can find out if there is something we can do.”

    (The agent reviews the reservation, and sees that the passenger has been re-accommodated to a new flight, and has been given a meal voucher for within the airport.)

    Agent: “With all due respect, ma’am, it seems that your flight into Calgary was actually early, and you had just over an hour to connect to your connecting flight. It even shows that the agent at the gate called your name a few times. I’m not sure how we caused you to miss your flight.”

    Passenger: “It was all your fault! And I want you guys to pay for my hotel for the night!”

    Agent: “Again, ma’am, I apologize for—”

    Passenger: “It was all the pilot’s fault! He didn’t tell me what time it was!”

    Agent: “I’m sorry, what?”

    Passenger: “The time! He didn’t tell me what time it was supposed to make an announcement about what time it is.”

    Agent: “Ma’am, as a former gate agent at the airport, I can assure you that the captain does make those announcements. Also, in the case that he does not, I happen to know that roughly every 15 feet within the airport, there is a clock on a TV, food service station, and in every lounge. May I ask where you were that you were unable to see the clocks or hear the gate agent?”

    Passenger: “That’s none of your business! Now, on top of paying for my hotel, I want you to pay me for my time that you’ve cost me by making me miss my flight. Give me back my money for this flight.”

    Agent: “So, ma’am, let me see if I understand this: you got on a flight, knowing you had a connection in Calgary. On your confirmation, it told you the time you would arrive and leave. The captain may not have announced what time it was over the PA system, but within the airport, there were many clocks and many attempts at calling your name to get you on your connecting aircraft. When you did not make it onto the flight, we re-accommodated you at no fee, and even gave you a meal voucher for your additional hours at the airport. Now, you would like us to give you a free flight, AND reimburse you for the hotel that you only get about five hours of use from.”

    Passenger: “Listen, are you stupid? You need to stop repeating me and get me some money.”

    Agent: “I’m sorry, ma’am; I am not going to be able to help you.”

    Passenger: “Tonight?”

    Agent: “Ever.”

    That’ll Cost A BUN-dle

    , | Cedar Rapids, IA, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

    (I am on the headset working the drive-thru, and my boss is near me bagging orders.)

    Me: “Hi, may I take your order please?”

    Customer: “Yeah, what comes on your #6?”

    Me: “Mayo, lettuce, and tomatoes.”

    Customer: “What?! No bun?!”

    (I don’t know how to react at first, and I can’t stop laughing for a second before I can respond.)

    Me: “No, ma’am, it comes with the bun.”

    My Boss: “You should have told her the bun cost extra.”

    These Customers Aren’t Even Faintly Sharp

    | Canada | Crazy Requests, Health & Body

    (A female and male customer walk into my tattoo parlor.)

    Female Customer: “Hi, I’d like to get my lip pierced, but I’m terrified of needles. Is there anything you can do?”

    Me: “Well, you could use [freezing cream] which would numb the skin and you wouldn’t feel a thing.”

    Female Customer: “Hmm, I don’t think so. Just show me the needle and I’ll faint, and then you can do the piercing.”

    Me: “Uh, I think that’s illegal.”

    (As I say this, the female customer has apparently spotted some of our needles nearby still in their packaging, which she apparently has no problems with. Without warning, she grabs one, rips it out of its packaging and proceeds to faint on the spot. The male customer speaks up in her place.)

    Male Customer: “Can’t you just do it now?”

    (I proceed to call an ambulance. Thankfully the woman is fine. My coworkers and I still talk about it!)

    Makes You Want To Run A Mile In No One’s Shoes

    | Kent, WA, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests

    (I’m working alone at a smaller store in a well-known local chain. Only two of the 20 locations in the state sell shoes, but people always ask. I’m ringing up a customer when the phone rings.)

    Me: “Sorry, I have to grab that.”

    Customer: “Okay! No problem.”

    Me: “Thank you for calling [store] in Kent; how can I help you?”

    (Silence.)

    Me: “Hello, you’ve reached [store] in Kent.”

    Caller: *screaming* “HI, DO YOU GUYS HAVE SHOES?”

    Me: “Sorry, no, the only stores that have shoes are [location] and [location].”

    Caller: “ARE YOU SURE?”

    Me: “…yeah, you have to go to either [location] or [location] if you want shoes.”

    Caller: “I DON’T LIKE THAT ANSWER.”

    Me: “Sorry, but that’s the only one I have for you. Anything else I can do for you tonight?”

    Caller: “NEVER TALK TO ME AGAIN! UGH!” *click*

    Me: “Well, okay then…”

    Customer: *laughing* “Sounds like you’re having a great night so far!”

    Putting The Sham Into Shampoo

    | Tinley Park, IL, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Money, Top

    (I work at a 24-hour store as a cashier. From 7-8 am I am the only cashier on duty. A customer has just dumped two baskets FULL of travel size shampoos, conditioners, body washes, and sunscreens on the belt.)

    Me: “Good morning, ma’am.”

    Customer: “Yeah, yeah. Make sure you put everything in separate bags.”

    (I look at literally hundreds of mini bottles on the belt and my eyes bug out.)

    Me: “You mean all the shampoos in one bag, and all the conditioners in one bag?”

    Customer: “Of course! You’re not that bright are you? No wonder you get s*** shifts at a crap place like this.”

    (At this point, another customer gets in line behind her and I can see his eyes bug out at all of the items as I have to check.)

    Me: “Alright, ma’am. That’s $98.74.”

    (The customer starts digging through her purse to find her wallet.)

    Customer: “I don’t have my wallet, so I don’t have my card.”

    Me: “Do you have cash or any other way to pay for the items?”

    Customer: “Do you not listen?! God you’re dumb! I don’t have anything!”

    Me: “Well, give me a moment. I have to have my manager come over and void out the order.”

    Customer: “You really should be nicer to your customers when your manager is around.”

    (My manager comes up and voids the order, all the while hearing this customer bad mouth me.)

    Other Customer In Line: “Lady, she’s just doing her job and she’s doing it rather well. I would have smacked you by now if you had talked to me that way. And if there is anyone dumb here, ma’am, it would be you who couldn’t even remember to bring your own wallet to the store with you.”

    Manager: *to the first customer* “I’ve voided the order, but I will keep all of it at customer service for you today so you can come back and get it later and not have to wait in line again.”

    (The customer gives the other customer in line behind her the finger, and huffs before leaving. My manager turns to the other customer in line.)

    Manager: “So, how big of a discount would you like today, sir?”

    Other Customer In Line: “Just my membership card thanks!” *to me* “You did good!” *grabs a chocolate bar from one of the racks* “Here, have this on me!”


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