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  • Had It Up To Their Neck With Bad Customers
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    Category: Crazy Requests

    Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

    Intelligence Is At An All Time Depression

    | Kansas City, MO, USA | Crazy Requests, History

    (We have a lot of customers who come in looking for something for someone else as a gift; however they often have no clue what they are looking for. Just ‘that thing their friend collects’.)

    Customer: “What is the name of that red glass?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but can you be any more descriptive?”

    Customer: “You know, that red glassware that people collect.”

    Me: “Um, ruby flash?”

    Customer: “No, no, no. It’s old, and collectible!”

    Me: “Is the glass itself dyed red, or is it painted red? Or is it a different base color with red designs?”

    Customer: “It’s red. Or pink.”

    Me: “Cape Code? Currier and Ives? Vaseline? Murano? I…I really need more information before I can help you.”

    Customer: “It’s the name of all the glass! I don’t collect it! My friend does! I want to get her some!”

    Me: *trying one more time* “Depression?”

    Customer: “DEPRESSION! THANK YOU!”

    (The customer walks away without even asking me where it is in the store.)

    Coworker: “Um… depression glass means any cheap translucent glass that was made during the Great Depression. It comes in almost any color you can think of, not just red and pink.”

    Me: “You want to go explain that to her?”

    Coworker: “Nope.”

    Deliver Us From Bad Customers

    | CO, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

    (I am working the lunch shift at a sandwich shop that delivers. When I arrive, snow is starting to fall. After about an hour, the delivery drivers start to report that the roads are getting worse. The manager decides to stop delivery, but, as customers are still coming into the shop, he opts to keep the restaurant open. I answer a call.)

    Caller: “Are you guys still open?”

    Me: “Yes, for the time being.”

    Caller: “Thank goodness! Everybody is closing because of the snowstorm!”

    Me: “Yes, it’s starting to get pretty bad out there. In fact, we’re thinking about closing early ourselves.”

    Caller: “Well, I’m glad that you’re not closed yet! I’d like to place a delivery order.”

    Me: “Well, unfortunately, we’re not delivering right now. The storm has gotten so bad that we’re concerned for the safety of our drivers. However, as I said, we are still open. You can still place an order with me and come pick it up at the shop.”

    Caller: “Are you kidding me!? I’m not going out on these roads!”

    No Port For The Harbor

    | Port Charlotte, FL, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Technology

    Customer: “I dropped my phone in the water while I was on the boat this weekend, and I want to retrieve my pictures off of it. Can you do that?”

    Me: “Sure we can.”

    (I wait to see phone.)

    Me: “Where is it?”

    Customer: “At the bottom of the harbor; you can still get my pictures, right?”

    Can’t Handle The Weight Of Girl Power

    | ON, Canada | Crazy Requests, Health & Body

    (I am a girl, and so is the customer.)

    Customer: “I need a guy to help me get some boxes of paper.”

    Me: “Oh, they’re all busy, but that’s okay; I can get it for you.”

    Customer: “No! Girls shouldn’t be lifting heavy things!”

    Me: “Why not? I lift heavy things all the time.”

    Customer: “You shouldn’t be!”

    Me: “Why not?”

    Customer: “Because you are a woman! Women can’t lift heavy things! You’ll hurt your back!”

    Me: “Not if I lift it properly. I carry boxes of paper all the time as part of my job. I can lift it no problem.”

    Customer: “But I need five of them!”

    Me: “That’s okay; I’ll put them on a dolly.”

    Customer: “No! Women shouldn’t be lifting things as heavy as that!”

    Me: “Okay, seriously. Women can lift whatever they want. Just because I’m a woman doesn’t mean that I can’t lift paper. If I wasn’t a strong woman, maybe I wouldn’t be strong enough to do it, and then I would hurt myself. But I am strong enough to lift that paper, so I won’t hurt myself.”

    Customer: “I’M NOT BUYING THE PAPER UNLESS A MAN LIFTS IT FOR ME!”

    Taking A Dip In The Deep End

    | Louisville, KY, USA | Crazy Requests, Health & Body, Hotels & Lodging

    Me: “Hi! Are you checking in?”

    Elderly Wife: “Well, we may be. We’d like to see one of your rooms.”

    Me: “Sure thing.”

    (After establishing which type of room they’d like to see, the elderly husband takes the key and starts heading toward the room.)

    Elderly Wife: “I’m sorry; I know this is unusual. But my husband always needs to check the water level in the commodes. If it’s too high, he sometimes… dips in.”

    (The husband comes back.)

    Elderly Husband: “Let’s try the place across the street…”


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