Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Talking At-At Cross Purposes
    (1,399 thumbs up)
  • October Theme Of The Month: Coupon Complications!
    Submit your story today!

    Category: Crazy Requests

    Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

    Not Quite The Picture Perfect Finish

    | Orem, UT, USA | Crazy Requests, Family & Kids, Wild & Unruly

    (Our studio is in a mall. I’m the photographer in a sitting with a young child. The child is throwing a tantrum, crying and screaming, while the mother stands next to me doing nothing.)

    Me: “Sometimes when kids won’t cooperate, we suggest taking a break. There’s a candy store right next to us or the toy store is right across the hall.”

    Mother: “I don’t want to wait any longer to get these photos done. Just take the photo.”

    Me: “We could get you right in when you come back. You wouldn’t have to wait again. Sometimes kids just need a quick distraction to calm down.”

    (The kid is currently in full meltdown mode.)

    Mother: “Just take the photo so I can purchase a package and go home.”

    (Without even looking at the child, I snap a photo. The image comes up on the screen: the child is mid-tantrum, red-faced and screaming. I turn to the mother, deadpan.)

    Me: “How’s that?”

    Mother: “… The candy store is right next to you?”

    Get A Sign Pointing To The Sign

    | London, England, UK | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid

    (When the ticket office is closed customers can buy tickets at the popcorn counter.)

    Customer: “Where can I buy tickets?”

    Me: “At the popcorn counter.”

    Customer: “Well… you should have a sign saying so!”

    Me: *pointing at a six-foot tall sign* “Do you mean like that one?”

    Customer: “Yes. You should get a sign like that!”

    Some Requests Are Too Exotic

    | CA, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Rude & Risque

    Customer: “Hi. I would like to confirm my order of exotic Mexican dancers for my brother’s bachelor party.”

    Me: “Um, sir, are you sure you have the right number? This—”

    Customer: “I am getting late! I ordered them yesterday!”

    Me: “Sir, this is [Home Retail Store]‘”

    Customer: “Yeah, I know that! What am I, an idiot?”

    Me: “Um—”

    Customer: “Of course you would have Mexican dancers! Are you even qualified to work here? Even a KID would know that!”

    Me: “Er… sir, are you sure you are calling the right place? THIS IS [HOME RETAIL STORE]. Let me repeat, sir. NOT MEXICO.”

    Customer: “SOMEONE NEEDS TO TEACH THIS WOMAN A LESSON ABOUT HER JOB! WHAT KIND OF EMPLOYEE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT THEIR PRODUCTS ARE?”

    (Another employee comes up to me and mouths, ‘I’ll deal with him.’)

    Employee: “Sir, what are you looking for?”

    Customer: “I’M LOOKING FOR EXOTIC MEXICAN DANCERS FOR A BACHELOR PARTY! YOUR D*** EMPLOYEE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT SHE IS DOING!”

    Employee: “Oh, I found your order. Repeat your order for me please?” *winks at me*

    Customer: “Finally! Someone who knows their job! The number is [number].”

    Employee: “Thank you for your order. For the inconvenience, you will get them free. Expect them around 6:30 pm. Enjoy your party!”

    Put Them On The Wailing List

    | CT, USA | Crazy Requests

    (I work in a call center as a sales agent for a local insurance agency.)

    Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]. My name is [Name] and I’m a licensed insurance agent. I see here that you’re calling in to get a quote.”

    Customer: “I certainly am not! I keep getting all you god-d*** junk mail and I want it to stop! I don’t want your stupid insurance!”

    Me: “Well, I’m so sorry about that, sir. I can definitely understand how frustrating it is to have a mailbox full of junk mail. Can I have your last name, state, and zip code?”

    Customer: “What the f*** do you need that for? I’m not giving you ANYTHING! Just take me off your d*** mailing list!”

    Me: “Sir, in order to remove you from our mailing list, I need to find the file we’ve opened for you so we know WHERE to stop sending the mail.”

    Customer: “No, you don’t! This is ridiculous! Just take me off the f****** list!”

    Me: “Again, sir, I can’t stop sending mail to your address unless I actually have it and I can’t find any of your information without your last name, your state, and your zip code.”

    Customer: “F*** you!” *click*

    A Credit Score As Strong As Jell-o

    | Littleton, CO, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Money

    (I work at a call center selling TVs. All customers have to have a credit check performed to see what they’re eligible for as far as equipment. One caller has terrible credit, so the price is higher. I leave her my office number if she changes her mind. She calls me back.)

    Me: “Thank you for calling. How may I be of assistance?”

    Caller: “Hi. I called yesterday and the price was stupid high. I finally got the letter in the mail telling me about all the free upgrades and s***. I want the better price now.”

    Me: “That sounds great! Can I ask, did they run your credit score yesterday?”

    Caller: “Nuh uh.”

    Me: “Not a problem. So I can land you the best offer, let’s knock that out real fast.”

    Caller: “I already gave all this information! Why the h*** do I have to give it again?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I thought you hadn’t run a credit check prior to our conversation.”

    Caller: “Yes, I have! I just told you that! OPEN YOUR EARS!”

    Me: “My mistake. When was the score checked?”

    (I know when it was checked: yesterday, by me.)

    Caller: “Jesus F****** Christ! I want a manager on the phone!”

    Me: “Ma’am, a manager will tell you the same thing. I’m only trying to make sure we get you the best possible deal.”

    Caller: “Fine…” *provides information*

    Me: “Based on what you told me, this will be your price.”

    (It’s something high because her credit is awful.)

    Caller: “That’s the same price as yesterday! This is false advertisement! I’m going to sue!”

    Me: “Ma’am, on the bottom left of your advertisement, you’ll see that all prices are based off a credit score.”

    Caller: “That doesn’t matter! The flyer says I get a free upgrade and a better DVR!”

    Me: “Upgraded from what exactly, ma’am?”

    Caller: “From what you’re giving me today! That’s why I called! Now give me the f****** deal!”

    (Dumbfounded, I figure I might as well argue insanity with insanity.)

    Me: “I’m a big fan of green jello.”

    Caller: “WHAT THE F*** ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? I WANT A MANAGER!”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am. Please hold.”

    (I explain everything to our team lead and he gets on the phone.)

    Team Lead: “Hi, ma’am. This is [Name]. How can I be of service?”

    Caller: “You need to get your people in order. They don’t know s***!”

    Team Lead: “Ma’am, are you saying you dislike green jello? Because we just won’t tolerate that.”

    Caller: “WHAT THE F*** ARE YOU PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT!?”

    Team Lead: “An advertisement in the mail doesn’t change your credit score. That’s what my team member was telling you but you continued to act like a child. Do not call our department again unless you’re willing to be more polite to my team.”

    Caller: “Y’all are trying to play me! I’m getting my momma. She’ll straighten you out!”

    Team Lead: “I bet, considering the great job she did with you.”

    Page 56/141First...5455565758...Last