Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

It’s Time To Show Them The Door

| Denver, CO, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid

(I work at a movie theater that has its last show times at 10:30. We close 30 minutes after the last show time. A group of customers show up right at 11 and try to open our locked doors. Instead of realizing that we are closed, they start banging on the door to be let in. I try to ignore it, but my coworker gives in and opens the door for them.)

Coworker: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but we are closed for the night.”

Customer: “No, you’re not; you have a show time of 1 am for [Popular Movie] right there on your screen.”

Coworker: “Actually that was for 1 pm, not 1 am. We close at 11.”

Customer: “But your board says 1 am! Right there, look.”

Coworker: “I am sorry for the confusion, but that is definitely not for 1 am. We don’t have staff here past 12 at night to sell tickets.”

Customer: “Then why did you open the door?”

Coworker: “I opened the door to tell you we are closed.”

Customer: “But you opened the door! If you open it, doesn’t that mean you are open?”

Coworker: “Um…”

(I step in at this point.)

Me: “Ma’am, I am very sorry, but we honestly don’t have any times past 10:30 at night.”

Customer: “Can’t you just turn the projector on for us to watch the movie?”

Me: “No, we can’t, because our systems are automated. We have very little control on when the movies get played.”

Customer: “Then why did you open the door! You really shouldn’t open the door for someone if you are closed.”

Me: “Ma’am, I don’t want to be rude, but you were practically banging our door down.”

Customer: “Because I didn’t know you were closed! How was I supposed to know that you were closed?”

Me: “Because the door was locked?”

Customer: “But I didn’t know it was locked!”

Me: “But you couldn’t open the door…”

Customer: “I thought it was stuck or something!”

Me: “But not locked?”

Customer: “Yes! Why is this so hard for you to understand?!”

(The customer storms off with her group. She then turns back.)

Customer: “Lock your d*** door next time!”

A Do-Not-Disturbing Amount Of Stupidity

| SC, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Hotels & Lodging

Guest: “My room is filthy! I demand a free night! This is ridiculous! Give me your corporate number!”

Me: “I’m so sorry, ma’am. Give me your room number and I’ll sort this out!”

Guest: “209.”

Me: “Ma’am, it says you’ve been in this room three days. We have a housekeeper going to your room to clean it today. They’ll be there at 9 am. We have it listed that your room had a do not disturb sign for the last three days. Please remove it from your card slot and your room will be cleaned.”

Guest: “Well how the f*** was I supposed to know they wouldn’t come if that was there? You should tell people that! Poor service! Get to my room NOW and do your job! Idiots!”

Me: “…yes, ma’am.”

(She did this two more times in her two week stay, never once taking the do-not-disturb sign of her door.)

Don’t Read, And Pay The Price

| Moncton, NB, Canada | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Language & Words

(Our policy is, and has always been, that 30-days notice is required to cancel any service; this is clearly noted on all customer bills.)

Customer: “Why am I being charged an extra 30 days for service I didn’t use?”

Me: “Sir, you called on March 21 and requested that the account be closed on the 30th.”

Customer: “So?”

Me: “Well, 30 days’ notice is required to cancel any service. It’s indicated on every bill you receive—”

Customer: “What? You expect me to read?!”

It’s Curtains For Closing Time

| Seattle, WA, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Family & Kids

(I work in a small, locally owned business in an old building. Connected to our store is another small shop. Our owners have agreed to leave the passage between our stores open to promote business. We understandably get customers wanting to purchase the other store’s goods at our register, and other similar confusions. Most days, our hours are the same. One day a week my store closes an hour before our sister store. We have large, heavy curtains that can be drawn across the entrance between our stores. I am in the middle of closing procedure, have drawn the curtains, turned out most of the lights, and locked the front door. Our space has two adjoining rooms, so I can hear what’s happening in the other room, but can’t see. I hear loud thumping noises and footsteps. It is a woman and her seven- or eight-year-old son.)

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but we are closed. Today we close an hour earlier than [Adjoining Store], but feel free to browse further there.”

Woman: “Oh? You’re closed?”

Me: “Yes. As you may have noticed, all the lights are off in this store, and our hours are clearly posted on the other side of the curtains separating us from [Other Store.]”

Woman: “Well, it’s all so unclear. It looks like you’re open.”

(Meanwhile, her son is bounding around, disarranging the displays and generally being disrespectful of the space.)

Me: “I’m sorry, but we are closed. Our register is no longer open. Feel free to look at [Other Store]’s stock. They are open for another hour.”

Woman: *grumbles in direction of son* “Well, I guess this b**** won’t let you have a toy.”

Giving You An Earful Over The Ears

| Melbourne, VIC, Australia | Crazy Requests, Geeks Rule, Theme Of The Month

(For those that don’t know, LARP is Live Action Roleplay. We sell a lot of realistic looking weapons that are safe to hit people with, but are actually foam. Some are historically based, others are pure fantasy. We are at a convention.  I’m helping another customer when a guy on the other end of the table starts getting agitated by something.)

Customer: “No, these aren’t right at all.”

Me: “Sorry, I’ll be with you in a minute.”

Customer: “They’re just not accurate.”

(Finishing with the other customer, I move over.)

Me: “Well, it’s LARP, not re-enactment, so some of our weapons won’t be historically accurate. In fact, many are outright fantasy weapons that would have been amazingly impractical for real use.”

Customer: “Not the weapons, idiot! These!”

(The customer holds up a pair of prosthetic elf ears.)

Customer: “Moon Elves’ ears DON’T look like THIS.”

Me: “Uh… I’m pretty sure with elves being fantasy they can look like whatever the designer wanted them to, so long as they’re kinda pointy at the end.”

Customer: “BUT THEY’RE NOT ACCURATE!”

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