Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

Acting Irregular Over Regular Price

| Santa Cruz, CA, USA | Crazy Requests, Holidays

(We are a discount store that never has sales because our prices are already low. This year we open on Thanksgiving evening and stay open through Black Friday, though everything is regular price. A customer walks into store about an hour after we open.)

Me: *at cash counter* “Good evening, ma’am!”

Customer: “I heard you guys are opening now and aren’t closing until midnight on Black Friday!”

Me: “Yes, we’re going to be open all night tonight and all day tomorrow.”

Customer: “Great! I’m surprised there’s nobody here. So, what are the specials?”

Me: “Well, we actually aren’t having any sales; our prices are already rock-bottom.”

Customer: *confused* “So everything is regular price?”

Me: “That is correct.”

Customer: *shouting* “Then why the h*** am I here? I should be at home spending time with my family, not wasting time shopping at full price! I only came because I thought there’d be a good sale! You wasted my time and took me away from my family!”

Me: *pointedly* “I agree. I don’t like being away from my family on holidays either. Have a nice night.”

Customer: *leaves in a huff*

The Cake Order Is A Lie

| Hamilton, ON, Canada | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(As in many establishments, whenever we answer the phone we always answer with the name of our store, and our location.)

Me: “[Restaurant], Hamilton. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, I ordered a cake from you guys and I’m supposed to pick it up tomorrow. I want some information changed with the writing on the cake.”

Me: “Okay, could you please give me your information so I can find your order sheet.”

(Customer proceeds to give me his information. We are an extremely small store and so any cake order is simply posted on a cork-board and easy to find. I cannot find his order and I start feeling anxious.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but I don’t seem to be able to locate your order sheet.”

(The customer starts getting very angry, calling us incompetent and that he specifically remembers placing this order, etc. I’m trying hard to keep it together because I am not used to people talking to me in the way this customer is. I try to see what I can do.)

Me: “Sir, if you wouldn’t mind calling me back in ten minutes, I’m going to look through the whole store to see if I can find your cake order.”

Customer: “You do that!”

(He hangs up. We have two freezers: one in the front of the store and one in the back. None of the cake orders match his description. I wait for his call back with a sinking feeling in my stomach. I answer the phone, again with the name of the store and location.)

Me: “[Restaurant], Hamilton. How can I help you?”

Customer: *angrily* “Well? Did you find it?”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, I couldn’t.”

Customer: “Well you’d better fix this because this is all your fault and you’re going to ruin my mother’s birthday and I’m coming in tomorrow and it better be done! I can’t believe this. Do you even understand how irresponsible you are? How would you feel if someone f***ed up your order?!”

Me: “I would be upset as well, sir. I understand your anger.”

Customer: *condescendingly* “Well, that’s real diplomatic of you, kid.”

(He gives me his order again, then hangs up the phone. I’m really upset now and shaky, and I should have done this before, but I page my manager. When she calls me back, I tearfully explain the whole situation and she’s thoroughly angry at this guy. She has me call the only two other locations we have to check if they have the cake order, which they didn’t.)

Manager: “Wait a minute. Just humour me and call [Famous Ice Cream Chain] and see if they have his cake order.”

(Dubiously, I call the store. Please note, the names of our stores sound NOTHING ALIKE.)

Other Store: “How can I help you?

Me: “Hi, I’m calling from [Restaurant]. I just got a call from angry customer about his cake order. Do you happen to have [Customer]’s cake order?”

Other Store: “Yup. We sure do!”

Me: “Oh, my god, I’m so mad. I’m going to call you back.”

(I hang up and then call my manager.)

Me: “He totally ordered the cake from the other store!

Manager: “I knew it! And you answered the phone with our store name, right?”

Me: “Of course. Twice!”

Manager: “Okay, this is what you’re going to do. Call the store back, tell them to make the changes, and tell them to add this note. ‘Dear, sir, we have made the necessary changes to the cake as you have requested, DESPITE the fact that you called the wrong store multiple times, and we’re extremely rude to an employee of [Restaurant]. You are never to call [Restaurant] and order a cake from us. Sincerely, [Restaurant].”

(I called the other store, explained the situation, and I dictated the note to them, which they wrote down gleefully. I never found out if they actually gave the note with the cake but we never got a call from him again. Would have loved to have been a fly on the wall when he picked up his cake!)

Putting The Screwed Into Screwdriver

| Chicago, IL, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests

(I work in the hardware department of [Major Company]. I get a call 5 minutes to close.)

Me: “[Major Company] hardware department. This is [My Name] speaking. How may I help you today?”

Customer: “Hi, yes. I was looking to see if you have [item number] screwdriver set in. I have been looking at it for weeks, but have been waiting for the price to drop.”

Me: “Certainly, ma’am. Would you mind if I put you on hold for a minute while I go check?”

Customer: “Sure thing.”

*I put them on hold, find the set, and get back on the call*

Me: “Hello, ma’am? We do have the set in stock.”

Customer: “Oh, great, could you hold it for me?”

Me: “Are you in the parking lot?”

Customer: “No, why?”

Me: “Well, we can only hold items at our registers until we close for the night on the same day.”

Customer: “Well, how many do you have left?”

Me: “This would be the last one, ma’am.”

Customer: “Last one? What the hell?! Can’t you put it in back or something?! I’ll be there in 10 minutes to pick it up!”

Me: “Unfortunately, I cannot. We can only hold items until we close for the night and we closed about, oh…” *looks at clock* “… 5 minutes ago, now. There is no way you would be able to pick it up tonight, even if you ordered it online. We can always order it to the store or even to the house if we don’t have any in when you stop by. Might I suggest ordering it onl—”

Customer: “Don’t you dare mention that Internet hocus pocus! My husband needs this ASAP, and I’ll be there in 10 minutes AND IT. BETTER. BE. THERE!”

Me: “Certainly, ma’am.”

Customer: *hangs up*

Coworker: “What was that about?”

Me: “Some angry lady who’s going to be more pissed off than usual in about 10-15 minutes.”

(I found out two days later that the angry lady did come to the store 10 minutes later and found the building closed. She came in the next afternoon, demanded the set, got upset when it was no longer available, proceeded to throw merchandise around the department looking for it, and had to be escorted out by security.)

That One Is A Bad Egg

| PA, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(I recently started working at a local grocery store as a cashier. One of my duties is to inspect eggs to make sure they haven’t broken in their carton before the customer buys them. I do this as a woman is unloading the rest of her groceries. I pick one up delicately with my recently-washed fingers because I thought I saw a crack running to the bottom. The woman mutters something about needing to get more eggs and disappears. I think nothing of it until she comes back and hands me the new eggs. I open the carton to check them.)

Woman: “I already checked them! You don’t have to do that!”

Me: “Sorry, miss. Force of habit.”

Woman: “Well, stop it! That’s the whole reason I went back to get another carton! I don’t like people manhandling my eggs!”

(I become very embarrassed because I have impaired hearing in the ear that was facing her and realize I didn’t hear her asking me to not touch the eggs with my hands.)

Me: “I’m very sorry, miss! I didn’t hear you. It’s policy for me to check—”

Woman: “No! No one has EVER done that to me before! Where is your manager? This is unacceptable! I WILL NOT TOLERATE YOU MANHANDLING MY EGGS!”

(She thrusts the first carton of eggs at me and instructs me to get rid of them. I finish the transaction as quickly as possible, apologizing profusely as I go, but nothing placates the customer and she continues to rant about how I’m “clueless” and “no one has ever manhandling her eggs like that before.” She leaves in a huff and my next customer comes forward. He gives me a good-natured grin.)

Next Customer: “You can manhandle my groceries anyway you want!”

The Emperors New Clothes

, | Los Angeles, CA, USA | Crazy Requests

(I am the manager. I am only a few years older than the student who is working at the window, but today I decide to dress in more ‘manager-like clothes’ than my usual jeans and oversized t-shirt, while the student (who is on his third shift) is wearing gym clothes. A fancy-looking couple come to the window.)

Student: “How can I help you today?”

Woman: “We want tickets to all the dance performances this season, and we’d like to sit in the mezzanine. That’s the only place you can REALLY see the dancing.”

(We have had tickets on sale for several months, so all of the mezzanine is sold, as are most of the best seats.)

Student: “I’m afraid those seats are unavailable, but I can show you on this chart what we do have?”

Man: *leaning toward the window* “I don’t think you understand. We want to be able to SEE the dancing. Do you understand?”

Woman: “What do you have in these rows? This row should have a very good vantage point for us to really see the dancers.” *she points to rows that are no longer available*

Student: “I’m afraid those seats are sold, but these ones I’m showing you will have an excellent view, I can assure you…”

(The couple are beginning to get frustrated, and the student worker is not able to get a word in. I decide to go to the window.)

Me: “Hi, I’m one of the managers. Can I help you?”

Woman: “He won’t sell us mezzanine seats! How are we supposed to see the dancers?”

Me: *toward the computer screen and pretending to scrutinize* “Oh, yes, I see the problem. If it were me, I would want these seats.”

(I point to the exact same seats the student has picked, just on the House Left instead of House Right.)

Me: “That way, you’ll get a full empty aisle view and fewer heads in the way. Plenty of room to see the dancers!”

Woman: “Thank you!”

(They ordered “those seats the lady said were good” for the rest of the dance shows. I told the student later that he could have me do that same thing any time as long as he checked that I was wearing nice clothes!)

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