Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Filled With Creamy Justice
    (1,985 thumbs up)
  • July Theme Of The Month: Animal Madness!
    Submit your story today!

    Category: Crazy Requests

    Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

    Christmas Jeer

    | Naples, FL, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (I work at an office supply store that also does computer repairs. We are open late for Christmas. I’m the certified technician. The cashier is taking a break, so I volunteer to take over her register. A customer has walked up to the customer service desk. This desk has no register, but there is a register about five feet to the right.)

    Customer: “Hey! I was looking for this pocket calendar, but for this year. This other brand has more space, but I can’t find this one.”

    Me: “Sure. Let’s go take a look so you can pick the one you want!”

    Customer: “I already checked all of them. You don’t have it! I’m NOT walking back there! That’s what I came up here for! Now GO!”

    Me: “Okay…”

    (I walk back, stunned, and check for the product. We are out of stock. I come back to tell the customer. My coworker has come back, and tries to check another customer out, but register #1 has crashed. She has already taken the customer to register #2 and is checking them out.)

    Me: “Unfortunately, ma’am, we are out of stock. We can order the one you want online, however.”

    Customer: “No! I’ll just take this one. It’s already in my purse.”

    Me: “Okay. I’ll take you over at register #2, as register #1 has crashed.”

    (My coworker has finished checking out the customer, and is standing behind me watching this occur. The customer is standing, staring at the wall, obviously ignoring me.)

    Me: “Umm, ma’am? I said I can help you at register #2.”

    Customer: “You said you’d help me RIGHT HERE!”

    Me: “Sorry, I didn’t. Register #1 has crashed, and that’s the customer service desk. I couldn’t ring you up there if I tried.”

    Customer: “But that is not open. THIS ONE IS! HELP ME HERE!”

    (The light for register #1 is on still, and #2 is off. No one pays attention to the lights so no one turns them on for the occasional customer that is brought to them.)

    Customer: “This one’s light isn’t on. You can’t help me here.”

    (I turn the light on to humor her and start ringing.)

    Customer: “You all are so rude and unhelpful! I can’t believe you would treat me like this!”

    Me: “I’m sorry you feel that way about us.”

    Customer: “YOU ARE NOT SORRY! YOU ARE BEING INTENTIONALLY RUDE! YOU HAVE TERRIBLE CUSTOMER SERVICE!”

    (At this point I can’t tell whether to be angry or laugh at the absurdity. I am leading the numbers for customer service, and I’m always going out of my way for the customers.)

    Me: “Okay. Your total is [total]. You can swipe whenever you are ready. ”

    Customer: “I GAVE you the card. Figure it out yourself!”

    Me: “Okay.”

    (I swipe the card, and turn the PIN-pad towards her.)

    Me: “Please sign here.”

    (The customer proceeds to scribble on the screen in long sweeping motions, before finally pounding on the screen with the stylus. It does not respond to hard tapping, only light tapping. I’m afraid the screen will break at this rate, so I put my hand out near the screen.)

    Me: “Please do not break our screen.” *I tap the button*

    Customer: “DON’T F****** TALK TO ME LIKE THAT! I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT! DON’T OPEN YOUR MOUTH TO ME AGAIN!”

    (The customer throws the stylus at me.)

    Me: “Yes, ma’am.” *hands receipt* “Have a great evening, and happy holidays!”

    Customer: “Screw you! You people are so F****** RUDE!”

    Me: “Alright!”

    (The door closes.)

    Me: *to coworker* “I really don’t know whether to be mad or laugh… I’m so conflicted!”

    These Customers Come But Once A Year

    | Atlanta, GA, USA | Crazy Requests, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (The restaurant I work at is closed Thanksgiving and Christmas, and has been doing so for 20 years. Every year, we get at least one call the day after each complaining. It is December 26th.)

    Caller: “Hi. I tried coming to your restaurant yesterday but the lights were all out, the doors were locked, and nobody answered your phones!”

    Me: “We were closed yesterday.”

    Caller: “But you guys are never closed on Christmas!”

    Me: “Sir, we’ve been closed on Christmas and Thanksgiving every year since we opened.”

    Caller: “Liar! I DEMAND to speak to your manager!”

    Me: “Sir, I am currently the only one in right now. I can give you the owner’s number if you like.”

    Caller: “NO! I DON’T WANT TO SPEAK TO THE OWNER! I WANT A MANAGER!”

    Me: “I am the manager on duty. If you call back at about 11, the mid-shift manager will be in and you can speak with him if you don’t want to speak to me.”

    Caller: “I want free food because you people locked the doors and wouldn’t let me in yesterday!”

    Me: “Sir, I can’t give you free food because you came by on one of the two days of the year we are closed.”

    Caller: “Why the h*** not?”

    Me: “Do you work somewhere that closes on certain days?”

    Caller: “Yeah! I work for the bank!”

    Me: “So, if I called in on a Monday and demanded free services because I had come by the Sunday before and you were closed, what would you do?”

    Caller: “I would laugh at you and hang up.”

    Me: “Well, then, I guess that’s as good a plan as any.”

    (I laugh at him and hang up.)

    The Argument Crumbles Like A Cookie

    | Stockholm, Sweden | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (It is early November.)

    Customer: “Do you have any gingerbread cookies?”

    Me: “Sorry, ma’am. We don’t.”

    Customer: “Why would you not even have gingerbread cookies?”

    Me: “Sorry, but we haven’t even started making them yet this year.”

    Customer: “What? Why the f*** not?”

    Me: “Because here at [Shop's Name], we like to follow the traditions and not start baking Christmas cookies until Christmas time.”

    Customer: “Ah, I see! I’m glad to hear that you follow the traditions. All shops should be like you. I don’t get it why people just can’t wait these days. Everyone is just so d*** greedy!” *wanders off*

    Order(s) Out Of Disorder, Part 2

    | PA, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

    (I work at a drive-in style restaurant that also takes call-in orders. It’s store policy to ask for the customer’s name before ending the call, because we sometimes get more than one call-in order at a time.)

    Me: “Hello. How can I help you today?”

    Customer: “Pick-up.”

    Me: “Okay. Not a problem!”

    (I check the register, and I see that we have three call-in orders at the moment.)

    Me: “What was the name for that order?”

    Customer: “I don’t know! I didn’t call it in!”

    Me: “Well, we have several call-in orders right now so I’ll need some information to make sure you get the right one. What food was on the order?”

    Customer: “How the h*** should I know what she ordered?!”

    Me: “Okay… So, you don’t know the name and you don’t know what the order was for?”

    Customer: “Yeah, whatever! Now give me my food!”

    Me: “Without the name or the order, I have no way of knowing which one is yours. You’ll either have to call and ask or wait for all the other orders to be picked up first because I can’t just guess and risk giving out someone else’s food to the wrong person.”

    Customer: “WELL THAT IS JUST STUPID!”

    Related:
    Order(s) Out Of Disorder

    The Weather Outside Is Frightful And The Customer Is Not Delightful

    | Lincoln, England, UK | Crazy Requests, Holidays, Theme Of The Month, Transportation

    (I work as a telephonist and talk to huge volumes of customers each day. This particular day there has been a power cut which has knocked out the computer booking system and most of the traffic lights in town. To make things worse, the Christmas market in town is causing total gridlock. I receive a call from an angry caller.)

    Caller: “I want to know where my taxi is. It was supposed to be here five minutes ago. This is totally unacceptable.”

    Me: “I’m very sorry about the delay, madam. As you may know, there has been a power cut. Our driver has been stuck at an intersection. The traffic lights are down and the main flow of traffic isn’t letting the cross-flow through. This has caused a delay.”

    Caller: “Why the h*** didn’t you compensate for this and dispatch it earlier?”

    Me: “Once again, Madam, I’m sorry, but I’m not sure how I’m supposed to predict a power cut. Your car will be there within five minutes.”

    Caller: “Well, that doesn’t help me. I’ll ask again. Why did you not take this into consideration and dispatch the car earlier?”

    Me: “With all due respect, madam, I could ask you why you didn’t book it earlier if you knew there was going to be a power outage?”

    Caller: “How the h*** was I supposed to know there would be a power cut?”

    Me: “So you agree that these situations are unforeseen?”

    Caller: “I don’t want excuses. I want my taxi. You should have prepared for this and dispatched it earlier. I want your name so I can complain about your attitude.”

    Me: “Absolutely, madam. My name is [Name].”

    Caller: “And who is your manager?”

    Me: “That would be me. I can take your complaint about me now, if you’d like.”

    (The caller hangs up. The driver arrives three minutes later and waits outside of her house for five minutes. He calls her phone and even knocks on the door but the customer doesn’t answer. Ten minutes later the caller rings back.)

    Caller: “Where the h*** is my god-d*** taxi?!”

    Me: “The taxi called for you, madam. Did you not receive a phone call?”

    Caller: “Yes. What the h*** has that got to do with anything?”

    Me: “That was our driver, letting you know he was outside. Did you hear a knock at the door?”

    Caller: “Yes, but I didn’t answer because I was getting ready. Where the h*** is my cab?”

    Me: “He has been given another job now, madam. He waited outside for five minutes, called, and knocked. In addition, I told you personally that he would be there within five minutes. Yet you were still getting ready when it arrived.”

    Caller: “Well, you’d better get another f****** taxi here right now!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, madam. Due to the high volume of bookings, the power cut, and the Christmas market, our next available booking slot is in two hours.”

    Caller: *deafening stream of abuse*

    Me: “Have a nice evening and Merry Christmas, madam!” *click*


    Page 46/120First...4445464748...Last