Featured Story:
  • Always Time For A Rhyme
    (2,167 thumbs up)
  • Category: Crazy Requests

    Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

    Fire Sale Fail

    , | Stettler, AB, Canada | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Liars & Scammers, Theme Of The Month

    (We have a small electrical fire at our fast food restaurant. My fellow coworkers and I have just checked the building to make sure all the customers are out. Most of my coworkers have inhaled smoke and are being checked out by EMT’s. I’m standing near the doors to keep customers out.)

    Customer: “I ordered $40 worth of food. Why are you standing outside?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, Ma’am, we’ve had a small electrical fire…”

    (The building is clearly filled with smoke, visible through the windows that surround the restaurant.)

    Customer: “Well, is my chicken ready? Someone can just go get it. I’ve already paid.”

    Me: “You want someone to go into a burning building in order to get your chicken?”

    Customer: “Yes!”

    (Before I could respond my supervisor comes back from being checked out.)

    Supervisor: “Ma’am, even if someone did get your chicken, it wouldn’t be safe to eat. It was in the warming tray right below where the smoke came pouring out of the roof.”

    Customer: “THIS IS F****** RIDICULOUS! I’M A PAYING CUSTOMER AND I WANT MY CHICKEN!”

    (I walk away and leave my supervisor to deal with the customer. Shortly after I see the supervisor run back in the building and come out with the customers refund. The customer rips the money out of her hand and storms off, nearly hitting an employee in the parking lot with her car.)

    Supervisor: “I just refunded her $60 and told her she could have fresh chicken in the morning.”

    Me: “Just so you know, she ripped you off. Her order only came to $42.50.”

    Supervisor: “S***.”

    (Thankfully, the damage was mostly in the electrical work and the restaurant was opened the next morning.)

    Closed To Fake Customers

    | Toronto, ON, Canada | Crazy Requests, Theme Of The Month

    (Our store closes at 6 pm. It’s 6:20 and I’m standing by the front doors, waiting to lock up, while my coworker cashes out the last few customers at the store. While I’m eager to get home, I’m usually sympathetic when someone wants to grab something quickly. A woman walks up to me.)

    Customer: “Hi, are you guys closing?”

    Me: “Yeah, we’ve actually been closed for about 20 minutes.”

    Customer: “Oh, I wanted to go in.”

    Me: “Well, if you know what you want you can rush in and grab it.”

    Customer: *very bright and chipper* “Well, I wasn’t going to buy anything. I just wanted to look around.”

    Me: “Sorry, but we are closed.”

    Customer: “So you’re not going to let me in?”

    Me:“Um, no.”

    Customer: “That’s not very good customer service.”

    Me: “Well, that would be because you’re not a real customer.”

    Unable To Make Contact

    | MD, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, School, Technology

    (I work in the IT Help Desk of a university.)

    Caller: “I’m calling about the homepage for the university.”

    Me: “Okay…”

    Caller: “It’s terrible! I can’t see any contact information on the page at all!”

    Me: “Is it [website URL]?”

    Caller: “I don’t know! I’m not on that site now!”

    Me: “Okay, can you tell me the URL to the site you’re having this issue with?”

    Caller: “No! Your homepage doesn’t have any contact information! It’s terrible!”

    Me: “Well, I’m on the [website URL], which is what our homepage is, and there is contact information at the bottom of the page.”

    Caller: “That’s not good enough! You don’t have contact information on the page!”

    Me: “Yes, we do. It’s at the bottom of the page.”

    Caller: “Well, I’m a Harvard graduate and as an educated person, I didn’t think to look down there, so obviously the page is terrible.”

    Me: “Okay, well, at the bottom of the page-”

    Caller: “You’re telling me there’s the information there but I didn’t see it?!”

    Me: “What I’m trying to say is that it has a place to comment on the page. If you click-”

    Caller: “I’m telling you about this!”

    Me: “Okay, but I don’t run the website. So, if you click-”

    Caller: “This is a business call! I will never call again! I’m just trying to tell you the website sucks!”

    Me: “Well, thanks for letting us know. Have a great day.”

    Gives New Meaning To ‘Phone Bill’, Part 2

    , | CO, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Money, Technology

    (A customer calls in to a bank call center.)

    Customer: “I need to make a deposit.”

    Me: “I can certainly help you with that deposit. What do we need to deposit? Cash, check, money order?”

    Customer: “I need to deposit money.”

    Me: “What type of deposit? There are different ways to make a deposit depending on what you need to deposit.”

    Customer: “I need to deposit cash.”

    Me: “I can find you the closest ATM so you can make your cash deposit.”

    Customer: “You mean I have to go somewhere to make the deposit?”

    Me: “Yes, if you are depositing cash.”

    Customer: “Well, can’t I just deposit it over the phone?!”

    Me: No, I’m sorry. There is not a way to deposit cash over the phone.”

    Customer: “What kind of service is this?” *click*

    Related:
    Gives New Meaning To ‘Phone Bill’

    Driving To The Wrong Conclusion

    | Australia | Crazy Requests, Technology, Transportation

    (The company I work for has a competition to win a car for customers who purchase a sewing machine and have store membership. A customer comes in, thrusting a receipt at me, in broken English.)

    Customer: “I pick up.”

    Me: *looking at receipt* “Oh, you are here to pick up a machine you have already paid for? What name is it under?”

    Customer: “I pick up.”

    Me: “Yes, I know. I need your name.”

    Customer: “I buy sewing machine. I pick up.” *points to competition sign*

    Me: “What do you want to pick up?”

    Customer: “I buy sewing machine. Get car.”

    Me: “Oh, no, that is a competition. If you buy sewing machine you might win a car.”

    Customer: “Where car?”

    Me: “Competition is to WIN car, which will be drawn in two weeks. You might win a car.”

    Customer: “Car not here.”

    Me: “No, come back in two weeks to see if you won it.”

    Customer: “I get car?”

    Me: “Only if you win it.”

    Customer: “Can get car in two weeks?”

    Me: “If you win it, we will let you know. Good luck.”

    (The customer leaves. I wait until they are safely out the door before I stop biting my lips in an effort not to laugh.)

    Coworker: “You were with them for ages. What was wrong?”

    Me “They thought they got a free car with a $200 sewing machine.”

    Coworker: “You’re having me on. That’s a joke?!”

    (Two weeks later…)

    Coworker: *to me* “Those customers came back in to pick up the car. I thought you were joking that day.”

    (They came in two more times looking for their free car!)

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