November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

Pre(Car)ious Insurance, Part 7

| Vancouver Island, BC, Canada | Crazy Requests, Transportation

(A customer storms in waving his contract in the air.)

Customer: “I want this insurance coverage OFF! I returned this car yesterday and I realized today that the insurance coverage is still on here!”

Me: “Okay, let me have a look. It looks as though you accepted our collision coverage on the vehicle when you picked up.”

Customer: “But I didn’t even get in an accident so I would like a refund.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry, we can’t refund you for that just because you did not get into an accident. You agreed to take the collision coverage and would have signed for it on your contract.”

Customer: “No, this is stupid. I want this taken off now.”

Me: “I’m sorry. You have signed off on a legally binding contracting accepting our collision coverage for the four days you rented a car from us.”

Customer: “Well, I didn’t even look at what I was signing so it’s not my fault.”

Me: “We go over every contract verbally with our customers and explain each part that we need a signature on. We also do not add coverage on without discussing it with our customers first so it seems you agreed to it at the time.”


Me: “Again, sir, I’m really sorry, but you signed for this on a legal contract.”

Customer: “Let me speak to your manager NOW!”

Me: “Absolutely.”

(My manager has been sitting in the back office listening the entire time. He walks out, and the customer repeats everything again.)

Manager: “Sir, you put your signature down on a legal contract accepting this coverage. I wish that I could get a full refund on my yearly insurance just because I did not get into an accident, but unfortunately it does not work that way.”

Customer: “Well I didn’t read what I was signing. This is f****** ridiculous. I ACCIDENTALLY SIGNED IT!”

Manager: “WELL, THEN, WE ACCIDENTALLY COVERED YOU AND THE VEHICLE, NOW DIDN’T WE? I suggest next time you put yourself in the position of signing a LEGAL DOCUMENT that you will spend time reading it and pay attention when someone explains it to you.”

(The customer promptly left.)

Pre(Car)ious Insurance, Part 6
Pre(Car)ious Insurance, Part 5
Pre(Car)ious Insurance, Part 4

Experience Tells Me That You’re An Idiot

| IL, USA | Crazy Requests

Me: *answering the phone* “Hello, [Company]. This is [My name]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Hello, [My Name]. Are you experienced enough to help me?”

Me: *having worked in this company for several years now* “I can certainly do my best. What can I do for you?”

(The customer proceeds to describe a sensitive issue that I immediately recognize is beyond my authority to address.)

Me: “Okay, you will need to speak with my manager. They will be able to address this issue with you and make sure that appropriate action is taken.”

Customer: “What is your manager’s name?”

Me: “Their name is [Manager].”

Customer: “And are you sure that they’ll be able to help me?”

Me: “Yes, I can assure you that they will be able to help you with this issue.”

Customer: “Well, put me through to them, then! This is why I asked if you were experienced in the first place!”

Me: “Of course. I’ll transfer you now.”

(I have to wonder how they expected me to know if I was “experienced” enough without knowing what the issue was in the first place!)

Only Five Minutes Away From Crazy

| UK | Crazy Requests, Time

(I am working on the phones first thing in the morning at a busy medical centre. About half of our appointments are bookable in advance and half are on the day only. I take the third call of the day.)

Me: “Hello, [Centre]. How can I help?”

Patient: “Hello, dearie, I would like to book an appointment with [Doctor] at about 10 am. Do you have anything?”

(I check the computer system.)

Me: “Yes, we have an appointment at 10, actually.”

Patient: “Oh, that’s a bit early. Have you got anything else around that time?”

Me: “Yes, we have 10:10 or 10:20.”

Patient: “Well, both of those are a bit late; do you have anything at five past?”

(All our appointments last ten minutes, so we never have appointments at five past.)

Me: “Sorry, ma’am, we don’t do appointments at five past.”

Patient: “Bloody NHS! I’ve paid taxes my whole life and you can’t even give me an appointment around 10 am!” *click*

I Physically Despair

| CA, USA | Crazy Requests

Me: “It appears you’re going to have to get your title notarized at a local bank for us to transfer that title out of your name.”

Customer: “You mean I have to do something physical outside of the house?”

Pre(Car)ious Insurance, Part 6

| FL, USA | Crazy Requests, Transportation

Caller: “I would like to get a better auto insurance rate.”

Me: “I’ll be glad to go over your policy for possible discounts.”

Caller: “No need. The discount that I want added is one that most people will not qualify for. I belong to an elite group of drivers that do not ever have accidents.”

Me: “Unfortunately, sir, we do not offer that discount.”

(Probably because that caller was the only one in that ‘elite’ group.)

Pre(Car)ious Insurance, Part 5
Pre(Car)ious Insurance, Part 4
Pre(Car)ious Insurance, Part 3