October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

Customers Are Cry-Babies

| London, England, UK | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Family & Kids

(I work in a clothing store with 3 floors, and the fitting rooms are on the top floor. I have been chatting with a customer, admiring her adorable baby. Five minutes later, I notice the stroller is in the corner, baby fast asleep, but the mother is nowhere to be seen.)

Me: *on the store walkies* “Hey, guys, I’ve got a sleeping baby downstairs and the mother doesn’t seem to be down here. She’s blonde with a cool red leather jacket. Can anyone see her on their floor?”

Colleague: “Yeah, I just put her in a fitting room up here! Let me check in with her. I didn’t know she had a kid with her!”

(A couple of minutes pass.)

Colleague: “Yeah… She’s ‘just trying on a couple things and will be back in a minute.'”

Manager: “Um, no. Can you let her know that we are not responsible for her child, and she needs to come downstairs right away? We have a customer lift so she can bring the stroller up to the fitting rooms.”

Me: “Oh, god, it’s crying. What do I do?”

(I enjoy the cuteness of babies, but they freak me out.)

Colleague: “She’s on her way down, and she is NOT happy.”

Me: “Neither is her baby!”

(The customer comes stomping down the stairs, various items of clothing hanging off of her.)


Me: “Ma’am, I haven’t touched the stroller at all, but you really can’t leave your child unat—”

Customer: “Ugh, well, of COURSE she’s crying. You need to rock the stroller back and forth! God!! What kind of idiot are you?!”

(My manager appears, as if by magic.)

Manager: “Ma’am, my staff are not your babysitting service. We have elevators and large fitting rooms specifically for our customers who want to bring their children while they shop. We will be as accommodating as possible, but you cannot just leave your baby down here without saying a word. Frankly, I don’t understand why you would want to leave her with a complete stranger. Please stop shouting at my employee. Honestly, the noise is just making your baby cry more.”

(The customer gapes like a fish for a minute, embarrassed, mutters a rather sulky apology, and goes back upstairs – with the baby, this time.)

Me: “You’re a lifesaver.”

Manager: “Why would she leave that baby here? You could be a psychopath for all she knows.”

Me: “…Thanks?”

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 43

| Vancouver, BC, Canada | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Money

(Working for a large retail chain, our manager had decided that we would no longer accept checks, since they usually ended up bouncing. A customer walks up to the counter with an armful of stuff and pulls out his checkbook.)

Me: “Sorry, sir, but we don’t accept checks here.”

Customer: “But I prefer using checks.”

Me: “Sorry, we don’t accept them… How about your debit card?”

Customer: “I can’t use that. There’s no money in the account.”

Me: “Um… is this the same account for the check you were going to write?”

Customer: “Of course!”

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 42
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 41
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 40

Don’t Count Your Chickens Before They’ve Burned

| Fort Worth, TX, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests

(I work in a well-known retail store, where the bakery and deli are in the same area. This is important for this story. I work in the bakery side and sometimes help slice meat for the deli; therefore, I have no idea how to help a customer order a deli platter. This particular night deli is shorthanded because one of their workers broke her kneecap a few weeks ago.)

Customer: “Hi, can you help me with something in deli?”

Me: “I can certainly try to, ma’am.”

Customer: “I was wondering: do you have any of your deli platter menus?”

Me: “Let me check for you… Okay, here you go, ma’am.”

Customer: “This doesn’t look like the menu my mother has at her house.”

Me: “They differ store to store, ma’am.”

Customer: “Is there anyone who can help me right now who knows the deli?”

Me: “No, ma’am, not at this moment in time. They have to pull out the rotisserie chickens so they do not burn…

Customer: “Well, I’m the customer right now. I should be more important than future customers!”

Me: “As I said before, ma’am, they are more than happy to help you once they have the chickens out of the oven. The chickens are more important than you right now.”

(At this moment my bread oven started to go off, so I walk away, thinking she will just wait there for a deli associate to finish up their chickens and come help her. A few minutes later…)

Deli Associate: “Hey, where’s that customer who was standing at the counter waiting for help?”

Me: “I guess she didn’t want to wait for you to finish your chickens…”

Deli Associate: “Oh well. I’m still a little backed up. Can you stay by the slicers and help out?”

Me: “Of course, not a problem!”

(A few more minutes go by, and the customer still hasn’t shown back up. A manager is coming towards me so I think he encountered the customer and she said something to him, but…)

Manager: “Everything okay over here, [My Name]?”

Me: “Yeah, all good.”

Manager: “Okay, because I got a call earlier about a customer needing help and not getting it.”

Me: “Well, sir, I explained to her that this was not my area and she would have to wait a few minutes for a more experienced deli associate to finish their rotisseries.”

Manager: “Ok, that’s fine. Thank you, [My Name].”

(At this point, I’m thinking it’s all fine and dandy. A few minutes pass, and I see the customer with a CSS.)

Customer: “Her! She’s the one who wouldn’t help me!”

CSS: “Ma’am, is the deli your area?”

Me: “No. As I have already explained to her, she had to wait for a deli associate to finish taking out the chickens. That’s our policy. We can’t sell a dry, burned chicken. Sorry, ma’am.”

(She leaves the store in a huff. Later that night I see the CSS as I’m leaving for the night.)

Me: “Sorry for the trouble earlier.”

CSS: “Oh, no problem. [Manager] explained the policies to me. Besides, that woman was a little crazy. She just started yelling at me as soon as I came out of the cash office!”

Me: “Wow. Well, good night. Have a good rest of your evening.”

CSS: “Ha, yeah, right. I’m a front end manager…”

Me: “Oh, right…”

Has No Loyalty To Common Sense

| Reno, NV, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Technology

Me: “If that’s all today, your total is [amount].”

Customer #1: *slides card in card reader* “Why does it say card not recognized?”

Me: *looking at card* “Because that is for [Competing Chain]. We can’t take their cards.”

Customer #1: “Well, that’s stupid. You’re both gas stations. You should honor each other’s cards.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. I don’t make the rules; I just have to follow them. Do, you have another form of payment?”

Customer #1: “Fine.” *hands over cash*

(I ring up the next customer.)

Me: “If that’s all today, your total is [amount].”

Customer #2: “Oh, I have a loyalty card.”

Me: “Okay, just slide it in the card reader and we’ll see if you have any rewards saved up.”

(Customer #2 slides their card. I see an error message that it isn’t a valid account.)

Me: “Hmm, the card reader didn’t recognize it. Let me try to enter it manually.”

(Customer #2 hands me the card. It is for a grocery chain.)

Me: “Sir, this is a [Grocery Chain] card. We can’t take those here. Do you have a [Our Convenience Store] card?”

Customer #2: “What? But the card says I can use it at the gas station.”

Me: “Yes, at their gas station out front of their store. We can only take our own loyalty cards.”

Customer #2: “Well, that’s misleading.”

(… and this is why I’m incredibly grateful that my last day on that job was last week!)

A Special Case Of Special Treatment

| Atlanta, GA, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests

(I’m a customer at a restaurant that has a counter to make your order and pushes it down the counter towards the register where you pay. There are entrances on two sides of the building and only one register, so there tends to be two lines from both doors.)

Me: *to the customer at the front of the other line* “If you have decided, you can go ahead of me. I’m still deciding.”

Customer #1: *from the other line* “Thank you.”

(As he proceeds to the front counter, the customer who was behind me, Customer #2, speaks up.)

Customer #2: “Why did you let him through?”

Me: “I’m still deciding on what I’d like to order, so I let him pass so I wouldn’t hold up the line.”

Customer #2: “So you just let him pass? We have places to be and want to order as well! He should wait until after you and not break the pattern. You should learn some respect for everyone and not give anyone special treatment unless you give it to everyone!”

Me: *sigh* “If you’re in that much of a rush, you can go ahead of me as well.”

Customer #2: “D*** right I will!”

(Customer #2 pushes me aside as she moves in front of me to get to the counter. During the entire time she was ordering, she kept yelling at the employee about being too incompetent to work. After she and the next customer from the other line order, I step up to order. Whilst waiting for my order to be made, I wait in line to pay at the register. Upon reaching the register, Customer #2 is still near the register, looking through her order to make sure it’s right.)

Cashier: *to me* “Your order comes to [total].”

Me: “I’m sorry, but that’s much too low for my order.”

Customer #2: *upon hearing the price* “Yeah, he ordered much more food than me. Why is his food cheaper?”

Cashier: “Well, the customer that he let ahead gave extra money and paid for this man’s order.”

Customer #2: “And that makes it right? Nobody deserves special treatment unless everyone gets it!” *turns to me* “I demand that you give me money to pay for my meal!”

Me: “I will not. As you told me earlier, I should learn to respect everyone, but I’ve already learned to respect those who deserve respect. From the rudeness that you have shown, not only me, but the employees working here as well, you do not deserve my respect.”

Customer #2: *turning back to the cashier* “This man is rude to your customers! I demand that you refuse his order and kick him out!”

Cashier: “I’m not allowed to refuse service to any paying customer. If you’d like, I can get my manager and you can talk to him.”

Customer #2: “D*** right you will!”

(Completely astonished, I now have to wait at the register for the cashier to return so I can pay for the rest of the order, which results in the line being held up. Eventually, the manager comes out.)

Manager: “Is there something I can do to help?”

Customer #2: “Yes, you can get this piece of trash out of here.” *she points to me*

Manager: *looking at me, then back at her* “I will not.”

Customer #2: “Excuse me? I’m a paying customer, unlike this a**-hole who’s practically getting his meal free! I demand you get him out of here!”

Manager: “As I said, I will not. This gentleman is here at least once a week and is kind to each of us here. You, on the other hand, have shown that you’re willing to make a big fuss over something insignificant and holding up all the other customers. If anyone should be kicked out, it’s you.”

(All the customers and employees cheer in agreement.)

Customer #2: “How dare you speak to me that way! I’ll be calling corporate and getting this place shut down!”

Manager: “We’ll be waiting with the security footage to back us up.”

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