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  • Had It Up To Their Neck With Bad Customers
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    Category: Crazy Requests

    Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

    A Good Customer Is A Fresh Breath Of Air

    , | NJ, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Themed Giveaway

    (I enter a local fast food place. There’s only one customer ahead of me standing to the side. Just as I get to the counter to place my order he’s given an order of french fries. He lets out an incredibly loud and dramatic sigh, then proceeds to yell at the woman who gave them to him.)

    Customer: “You know, you should just LISTEN to your customers!”

    Employee: “What’s wrong, sir?”

    Customer: “I said I wanted the FRESH ONES!”

    Employee: “Oh, I’m sorry, sir. I wasn’t told. That batch just came out a minute ago. It’s still hot from the fryer.”

    Customer: “I KNOW THAT! I specifically said I wanted the fresh batch you were working on!

    Employee: “All right. Again, I didn’t know that, sir. I’m sorry. I’ll take those back and the other ones will be right up.”

    Customer: “It’s just that you should LISTEN TO THE CUSTOMER! When he ASKS for something he should GET IT!”

    (By this point all other conversation in the front of the restaurant has stopped and everyone – customers and employee alike – are staring at the man who’s still raising a fuss over something that has essentially already been resolved. He grabs his tray and stomps over to the far side of the counter, standing there with arms folded and huffing like someone a tenth his age. I finally step up to the register.)

    Me: “Yes, I’ll have the [combo meal], and I’d like my soda made FRESH, please. Mix the syrup up yourself. And if you could take a straw and blow the bubbles into it right in front of me that would be great!”

    (The other customer apparently didn’t hear me but at least I got a laugh out of the crew and the other people in line!)

    The Whole Nine Yards Of Unreason

    | GA, USA | Crazy Requests, Themed Giveaway

    (Whilst having an indoor yard sale, I happen to have an open and hours sign from our old store, so I put them up. A customer in a rather nice car pulls up.)

    Customer: “What kind of store is this?”

    Me: ‘It’s a yard sale. I just happen to have the signs and thought they would be funny.”

    Customer: “Oh… okay.”

    (The customer proceeds to browse for a few minutes.)

    Customer: “Is this used?”

    Me: “Yes.”

    Customer: “How about this? Is this used?”

    Me: “Yes…”

    Customer: “WHAT NERVE DO YOU HAVE SELLING USED ITEMS? THIS IS THE WORST STORE I’VE BEEN TO!”

    Me: “This is a yard sale. That’s generally how it works. People sell their used goods.”

    Customer: “I’ve never heard of nonsense like that. Nobody wants someone’s used things. I’m reporting you to the Better Business Bureau!”

    Me: “Go right ahead. Have a nice day.”

    Best To Try To Rise Above It

    , | Portland, ME, USA | Crazy Requests, Health & Body, Themed Giveaway

    (I am in the middle of a health scare involving my lungs, and my doctor has told me not to use the stairs for more than one flight. I need to be on the fourth floor, so I am waiting for the elevator when a patron storms up to me.)

    Patron: “Excuse me! I don’t know if you read the sign, but it clearly says that this elevator is for handicapped people. Not people who are just too lazy to use the stairs.”

    Me: “…I beg your pardon?”

    Patron: “You need to leave the elevator for the people who really need it.”

    Me: “Ma’am, I need the elevator.”

    Patron: “That’s bulls***.”

    Me: “Look, lady. One of my LUNGS is not functioning right now, and my doctor has told me that I’m not allowed to take the stairs.”

    Patron: “Your doctor is too easy on you!”

    Hasn’t Got A Mind For Business

    | Draper, UT, USA | Crazy Requests, Money, Themed Giveaway

    (I work at a call center for a website that sells musical equipment. A customer has called in with a complaint. He places an order for a pair of powered speakers. There is also a canceled order for a different pair of powered speakers. Apparently, the wrong set of speakers was canceled and the customer is very upset that he received the wrong speakers. I immediately set up a return/exchange for him so he could get the speakers he wanted. For some reason, he was also under the impression that the price he was quoted for the second set of speakers was for the speakers and a wireless microphone. Unfortunately, it was just for the speakers.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but the price you were quoted is only for the set of speakers. If you want to add the wireless microphone to the order, it will be [price].”

    Caller: “That’s not right. I was quoted [price of speakers] before! I want that price!”

    Me: “I do apologize, sir. I can’t get you that price. You need to pay for the microphone before we can send it to you.”

    Caller: “I already paid for it! It was on the order with the other speakers!”

    Me: “That order was canceled, sir. We didn’t take any money from you for that order.”

    Caller: “You’re wrong. I paid for that.”

    Me: “No, sir. You didn’t. The order was canceled. We legally cannot take money from you until we ship something out. Since that order was canceled, it was never sent out. You did not pay for that order. If you would like to add the wireless microphone, your order total will be [price].”

    Caller: “NO, IT’S NOT! YOU’RE WRONG! NOW SEND ME WHAT I BOUGHT!”

    Me: “You didn’t buy them! The order was canceled!”

    Caller: “That’s not my fault! I shouldn’t have to pay for someone else’s mistake!”

    Me: “I apologize, sir. It is our fault, but we can’t just send you the microphone for free.”

    Caller: “I don’t want it for free! I want it at the price I was given!”

    Me: “To get it to that price, I would need to send it to you for free. I cannot do that.”

    Caller: “That’s not my fault. It’s not my problem. I shouldn’t have to eat that money. It’s your mistake! Now give me what I paid for, d*** it!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but you did not pay for those items. We will not send them to you. The order was canceled, so you did NOT pay for those.”

    Caller: “Well, in my mind, I did!”

    With Great Bacon, Comes Great Responsibility, Part 11

    , | Red Deer, AB, Canada | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Themed Giveaway

    (I am taking orders on drive thru.)

    Me: “Hi, welcome to [Restaurant]. What can I get for you?”

    Customer: “Hey! So, I hear you guys have hickory-smoked bacon! This is true, right? You have bacon?”

    Me: “Yes, we do. It can be added to any sandwich or baked goo—”

    Customer: “No, no, I just want bacon. Bacon!”

    Me: “Just bacon alone?”

    Customer: “Yeah! Lots of bacon!”

    Me: “So, would 10 slices be okay?”

    Customer: “No, make it 20! 30! Lots of bacon!”

    (I give him his total and he drives up to the window. I go wait by soup and sandwich for his order to be ready.)

    Coworker: “30 slices of bacon on the side? On the side of what?”

    Me: “…Just bacon. 30 slices of bacon.”

    (My coworker stares blankly at me before wrapping 30 slices of bacon in a sandwich bag and giving it to me, shaking her head. I take the bacon to the window and my other coworker gives it to him.)

    Customer: “Thanks, man! Gotta have my bacon!” *drives off*

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    With Great Bacon, Comes Great Responsibility, Part 2
    With Great Bacon, Comes Great Responsibility


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