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  • Had It Up To Their Neck With Bad Customers
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    Category: Crazy Requests

    Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

    No Returns And No Understanding

    | Sydney, NSW, Australia | Crazy Requests, Themed Giveaway

    (I usually work the floor and I happen to overhear a conversation as I am near the refunds counter.)

    Customer: “Hello. I’d like to return some clothes I’ve bought.”

    Cashier: “Sure. Do you have the receipt?”

    Customer: “Yep, I’ve got it right here.”

    (The customer then puts on the counter a bag from a different store and pulls out a receipt from said store.)

    Cashier: “Oh, sorry. I can’t return those. They weren’t bought from here.”

    Customer: “But I have the receipt for them. If I have a receipt, I can return what I’ve bought.”

    Cashier: “You can only return items to the store you purchased them from. These are from [Other Store], not here.”

    Customer: “I don’t understand. I have a receipt. Why won’t you give me a refund?!”

    Cashier: “Because they weren’t purchase from here.”

    Customer: “But I have the receipt. I did buy them!”

    Cashier: “You didn’t buy them from [Our Store Chain]. You bought them from [Other Store]. To get a refund you need to take it back to one of their stores.”

    Customer: “But why? If I have a receipt I can return it anywhere.”

    Cashier: “I can’t give you the refund because we never received the money . You didn’t buy the items from here, which therefore means we can’t resell the items, since we don’t stock them.”

    Customer: “Yes, but [Other Store] is so far away. I don’t have time to go there. I have my receipt. Please give me my money back.”

    Cashier: “We never received your money in the first place.”

    Customer: “So I’m not getting a refund?”

    Cashier: “Not from here I’m afraid.”

    (The customer begins to walk away, mumbling.)

    Not Quite The Picture Perfect Finish

    | Orem, UT, USA | Crazy Requests, Family & Kids, Wild & Unruly

    (Our studio is in a mall. I’m the photographer in a sitting with a young child. The child is throwing a tantrum, crying and screaming, while the mother stands next to me doing nothing.)

    Me: “Sometimes when kids won’t cooperate, we suggest taking a break. There’s a candy store right next to us or the toy store is right across the hall.”

    Mother: “I don’t want to wait any longer to get these photos done. Just take the photo.”

    Me: “We could get you right in when you come back. You wouldn’t have to wait again. Sometimes kids just need a quick distraction to calm down.”

    (The kid is currently in full meltdown mode.)

    Mother: “Just take the photo so I can purchase a package and go home.”

    (Without even looking at the child, I snap a photo. The image comes up on the screen: the child is mid-tantrum, red-faced and screaming. I turn to the mother, deadpan.)

    Me: “How’s that?”

    Mother: “… The candy store is right next to you?”

    Get A Sign Pointing To The Sign

    | London, England, UK | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid

    (When the ticket office is closed customers can buy tickets at the popcorn counter.)

    Customer: “Where can I buy tickets?”

    Me: “At the popcorn counter.”

    Customer: “Well… you should have a sign saying so!”

    Me: *pointing at a six-foot tall sign* “Do you mean like that one?”

    Customer: “Yes. You should get a sign like that!”

    Some Requests Are Too Exotic

    | CA, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Rude & Risque

    Customer: “Hi. I would like to confirm my order of exotic Mexican dancers for my brother’s bachelor party.”

    Me: “Um, sir, are you sure you have the right number? This—”

    Customer: “I am getting late! I ordered them yesterday!”

    Me: “Sir, this is [Home Retail Store]‘”

    Customer: “Yeah, I know that! What am I, an idiot?”

    Me: “Um—”

    Customer: “Of course you would have Mexican dancers! Are you even qualified to work here? Even a KID would know that!”

    Me: “Er… sir, are you sure you are calling the right place? THIS IS [HOME RETAIL STORE]. Let me repeat, sir. NOT MEXICO.”

    Customer: “SOMEONE NEEDS TO TEACH THIS WOMAN A LESSON ABOUT HER JOB! WHAT KIND OF EMPLOYEE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT THEIR PRODUCTS ARE?”

    (Another employee comes up to me and mouths, ‘I’ll deal with him.’)

    Employee: “Sir, what are you looking for?”

    Customer: “I’M LOOKING FOR EXOTIC MEXICAN DANCERS FOR A BACHELOR PARTY! YOUR D*** EMPLOYEE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT SHE IS DOING!”

    Employee: “Oh, I found your order. Repeat your order for me please?” *winks at me*

    Customer: “Finally! Someone who knows their job! The number is [number].”

    Employee: “Thank you for your order. For the inconvenience, you will get them free. Expect them around 6:30 pm. Enjoy your party!”

    Put Them On The Wailing List

    | CT, USA | Crazy Requests

    (I work in a call center as a sales agent for a local insurance agency.)

    Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]. My name is [Name] and I’m a licensed insurance agent. I see here that you’re calling in to get a quote.”

    Customer: “I certainly am not! I keep getting all you god-d*** junk mail and I want it to stop! I don’t want your stupid insurance!”

    Me: “Well, I’m so sorry about that, sir. I can definitely understand how frustrating it is to have a mailbox full of junk mail. Can I have your last name, state, and zip code?”

    Customer: “What the f*** do you need that for? I’m not giving you ANYTHING! Just take me off your d*** mailing list!”

    Me: “Sir, in order to remove you from our mailing list, I need to find the file we’ve opened for you so we know WHERE to stop sending the mail.”

    Customer: “No, you don’t! This is ridiculous! Just take me off the f****** list!”

    Me: “Again, sir, I can’t stop sending mail to your address unless I actually have it and I can’t find any of your information without your last name, your state, and your zip code.”

    Customer: “F*** you!” *click*


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