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May Theme Of The Month: Movie Mayhem!

Category: Crazy Requests

Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

Shopping In Shades Of Grey

| USA | Crazy Requests

(I work in a store known for selling Goth clothing. It is the height of the Black Friday rush. I’m one of two people working our entire floor when a lady approaches me…)

Lady: “Hi, I’m looking for a shirt my daughter wanted. It was black.”

Me: “…”

(After 30 minutes of searching, and being told I’m terrible for not knowing what she needs when 75% of our store is black, we find the shirt. It was a pale grey.)

Tagged And Bagged

| USA | Crazy Requests, Criminal/Illegal

(My store is in a mall, and we use sensor tags to deter theft. If the alarm near the door sounds, we’re required to check and see why. A man comes in and sets off the alarm. He approaches the desk with a large duffel bag.)

Him: “Hi, I need your help.”

(He opens the bag; it contains clothes from another store with the sensor tags still attached, which are usually removed when you pay.)

Him: “Can you remove these tags for me?”

(Needless to say, I told him no.)

Babying The Customers

| LA, USA | Crazy Requests, Family & Kids

(I used to own a small shop that made custom t-shirts. I am now retired… Customers like this one are one of the reasons:)

Customer: *holding up a child’s tee shirt* “Do you think this will fit my baby?”

Me: *looking around, no child in sight* “Sure. Perfect fit.”

When Larry Met Crazy

| Mt. Vernon, IL, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests

(I am working in the afternoon as a board operator at a local country music station. At the top of every hour they play a five-minute feed from CNN news.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Station Name]. How may i help you today?”

Caller: “I DEMAND TO SPEAK TO LARRY KING!”

Me: “Okay, sir, I’m afraid I cannot do that. We are a—”

Caller: “I KNOW D***-WELL WHAT YOU ARE! LET ME SPEAK TO LARRY KING!”

Me: “I understand, but Larry King doesn’t work here. We only air CNN news, which comes in via an automated service.”

Caller: “YEAH! CNN! THAT’S YOU GUYS! CNN! LARRY KING IS ON CNN! LET ME TALK TO LARRY NOW!”

Me: “Sir, I’m afraid I cannot do that. He is not here in our studio. We are not CNN.”

Caller: “YOUR MANAGER, NOW! YOU’RE FIRED!”

Me: “Okay, please hold.”

(I transfer him to my manager. 10 minutes later…)

Manager: “I just dealt with the most angry man who thinks Larry King works here.”

Me: “I tried to explain to him that we only play CNN news on the top of the hour and that we are not CNN news.”

Manager: “Yeah, I told him the same.”

Me: “So how did you get rid of him?”

Manager: “I told him that Larry King traces all his calls before taking them and he hung up really quickly after that.”

Has You Running Around Like Busy Little Bees

| London, England, UK | Crazy Requests, Movies & TV

(I work in a small independent arts cinema. The theatre is known locally for its wealthy and demanding senior clientele. A fashionable elderly customer, clutching a large expensive handbag, approaches me and a coworker at the box office.)

Customer: “Are you brave?”

Me: *smiling politely* “Umm, I guess so.”

Customer: “Well, a large bee or hornet just fell from your ceiling into my handbag and I want somebody to fish it out.”

Me: “Oh, okay. Are you sure it was a bee or hornet?”

(This is early January in suburban London, in a building that in four years I’ve never seen any bee buzz about in… let alone a hornet!)

Customer: *suddenly angry* “YES, I’M SURE! I don’t know what to do; can’t you reach in and get rid of it!”

Me: “Sorry but I’m not going to reach into the bag Why don’t you tip the contents out carefully onto one of the seats behind you?”

Customer: “Yes, you do that for me.”

Me: “Well, I have no space behind the box office to do that and I wouldn’t want to be at fault if I damaged any of the contents when I shook the bag out. Sorry. Why don’t you try emptying the bag into one of the large popcorn boxes?”

Customer: “Ugh, is that all you can offer me?! A popcorn box…? Well, you’ve been absolutely no help at all.”

(She stomps away… and I go back to serving customers. 30 minutes later I go to check on the cafe within the cinema building and see the handbag wrapped in two layers of clear recycling bags just dumped in a corner. The cafe owner sees me staring at the bag dumbfounded.)

Cafe Coworker: *laughing* “Some woman made me wrap her handbag up because she is terrified about the hornet that got stuck inside, so I’m suffocating it for her. Oh and she told me you and the box office staff were no help and she is going to complain tomorrow.”

(She never did complain.)

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