Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Casting The First Stone Cold Glare
    (1,767 thumbs up)
  • August Theme Of The Month: We Are Closed!
    Submit your story today!

    Category: Crazy Requests

    Some customers can be demanding, but within reason. These customers however make some requests that go beyond demanding, beyond reasonable, beyond possible! These requests, like the customers, are crazy!

    Name Changer Is A Game Changer

    | Bellevue, NE, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Language & Words

    (I work for a nationwide retail company. We do not price match or accept coupons from other stores. The company name is very similar to another company of the same type, and people often get them confused. I ring up a customer’s items and total the sale before she hands me a page of coupons from a similar company’s ad flyer.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but these coupons are from [other company].”

    Customer: “Well, what is this?”

    (I look down at my apron, which displays my company’s logo.)

    Me: “This is [company name].”

    Customer: *angrily* “Well, it says [other company] out on the sign!”

    (I points to the sign by the street, which is visible from where we are standing.)

    Me: “No, ma’am, I assure you that this is [company name].”

    Customer: *shoves coupons back in her purse* “You guys should change your name!”

    How To Spot A Bad Penny

    | AK, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Money, Top

    (I’m teaching a trainee how to operate the cash register.)

    Me: “You see, all you have to do is press this button here, then the drawer will open, and the amount to give back will be up on the screen, as well as the receipt.”

    Trainee: “Oh! That’s really easy!”

    (During this time, a regular customer has been watching us, kind of poking around at the end of the register for awhile. I’m keeping an eye on her, as this customer is notorious for being dramatic.)

    Customer: “I’m ready to check out!”

    Trainee: “Yes ma’am, how are you today?” *begins checking out her items*

    Customer: “Oh, I’m fine. I have some change I’d like to empty from my purse.”

    (At this point I’m relatively relieved, as there hasn’t been any issues. However, she proceeds to pull four BAGS of PENNIES from her purse, and plops them on the counter.)

    Customer: “It’s legal tender, so start counting!”

    Me: “No.”

    Customer: “Excuse me?!”

    Me: “There is a Coinstar to your left, and a bank right in front of you. The Coinstar charges 8.9 cents per dollar, and I’m pretty sure the bank does it for free. I’ll be happy to suspend your order until you’ve returned.”

    (Despite how calm I am, my trainee looks visibly terrified.)

    Customer: “Shame on you. What terrible customer service. I will call and have you fired!”

    Me: “Ma’am, as I’ve said, I will be happy to suspend your order, but if you continue on yelling, I will have to ask you to leave.”

    Customer: “I am the customer! I am always right, so be—”

    Me: “QUIET.”

    Customer: *goes slack-jawed*

    Me:You will not get anyone here fired. You have not only been horrifically rude, but have made an extremely embarrassing spectacle of yourself in front of most of the store. You are holding up this line. Here are your bags of pennies, so please leave.”

    (The customer dawdled away from my register, but stayed by the front of the store screaming at everyone who walked in about us not taking her bags of pennies. The manager had to eventually call the police on her. It took a long time to reassure my trainee that not everyone was crazy like that!)

    Judging A Book By Its Cover, Part 2

    | NE, USA | Crazy Requests

    (I am shelving books when a young lady, probably in college, comes up to me.)

    Patron: “Excuse me, miss, could you please help me find a book for my class?”

    Me: “Sure, no problem. What’s the title?”

    Patron: “I can’t remember.”

    Me: “Well, okay, what’s the author’s name?”

    Patron: “I don’t know.”

    Me: “Can you tell me what the book was about, then?”

    Patron: “It’s for literature class!”

    Me: “Yes, but can you give me any idea what it might be about? Is it fantasy, science fiction, a mystery?”

    Patron: “I don’t know yet. I haven’t read it!”

    Me: “Um…do you know anything about the book?”

    Patron: “Yeah. I think the cover’s blue.”

    Me: “…Then how are you going to find it?”

    Patron: “I just told you: I need it for class! Can’t you just help me?”

    Me: *giving up* “I’m sorry, ma’am. I can’t find a book with nothing but the color of the cover.”

    Patron: “But you work here! Isn’t that your job?!”

    Related:
    Judging A Book By Its Cover

    Death Of An Insurance Salesman

    | ON, Canada | Crazy Requests

    (I work for a very large insurance company. An angry client calls in with a thick foreign accent. Note that my trouble understanding her is making her aggravated.)

    Client: “Why haven’t you paid me my insurance money?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, I’m not really understanding the question. Could you clarify a little more for me?”

    Client: “You must pay me the $100,000 for my insurance!”

    Me: “Ma’am, you are the insured person on this policy. Who is it that has passed?”

    Client: “No one passes! I need you to pay me my insurance.”

    (This continues back and forth for five minutes.)

    Me: “Ma’am, we can’t pay you the money from your life insurance policy for the same reason you cannot bury a man living in the USA in Canada.”

    Client: “Why not?!”

    Me: “Because you’re not dead.”

    Re-Cycling DVDs

    | Toronto, ON, Canada | Crazy Requests, Top, Wild & Unruly

    (Our store releases new DVDs every Tuesday. A customer comes in on Wednesday, visibly angry.)

    Customer: “What the h*** is wrong with your movies? This doesn’t work!”

    (I open the case and discover that the brand new DVD is broken in several pieces, and has a large tire tread on the back.)

    Me: “Sir, what happened? The DVD is completely destroyed!”

    Customer: “I ran over it with my motorcycle. Why?”

    Me: “…You ran over it…”

    Customer: “I wanted to see if they still made them like they used to! Back in my day you couldn’t destroy things like this! I demand a refund!”

    (He continues to yell and rant until my manager shows up. I explain what the story is, with the customer agreeing with me word for word on what happened. Finally, my manager speaks.)

    Manager: *to the customer* “What are you, an idiot?”


    Page 102/130First...100101102103104...Last