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  • September Theme Of The Month: Overheard!

    Category: At The Checkout

    The customer has seemed normal and maybe even intelligent throughout the shopping purchase. But then they get to the checkout and as soon as human interaction is required it all falls apart. The checkout operators really are our first line of defense against the stupid customer!

    Really Needs Their Breakfast

    | Mesa, AZ, USA | At The Checkout, Food & Drink

    Coworker: “Hello, welcome to [Fast Food Place]. How may I help you?”

    Customer: “I would like two breakfast burritos.”

    Coworker: “Did you want sausage or bacon?”

    Customer: “Yes.”

    Coworker: “Sausage or bacon?”

    Customer: “Yes.”

    Coworker: “Did you want your breakfast burritos with bacon or sausage?”

    Customer: “Sausage.”

    Coworker: “Anything else I can get for you today?”

    Customer: “Yes.”

    Coworker: “Okay and what else can I get for you?”

    Customer: “Yes.”

    Coworker: “Okay… that will be [total] for the breakfast burritos.”

    Don’t Discount The Customer’s Ability To Discount, Part 4

    | New Zealand | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Money

    (My manager is serving a customer who has asked for a discount.)

    Manager: “Sure, I can give you 10% off.”

    Customer: “Hmm, what about 15%?”

    Manager: *feeling generous* “Yeah, I suppose I could give you 15% off.”

    Customer: “What about 20%?”

    Manager: “20% is okay.”

    Customer: “30%?”

    Manager: “15%.”

    Customer: “30%?”

    Manager: “10%.”

    Customer: “What do you mean 10%? You already said I could have 20%.”

    Manager: “Which you asked for and I agreed but you upped it; you can either take the 10% now or my next offer.”

    Customer: “Hmmm, I’ll take the next offer then.”

    Manager: “Zero percent discount it is, then.”

    Customer: “What? You can’t do that!”

    Manager: “I just did.”

    Mugged Of Coffee Common Sense

    | Adelaide, SA, Australia | At The Checkout, Food & Drink, Funny Names

    Me: “Good morning, sir, what can I get for you?”

    Customer: “A mugachino, thanks.”

    (I ring it up as a large cappuccino as we’ve figured out that’s what most customers who order a ‘mugachino’ want. After a few minutes I take the coffee to him.)

    Me: “Here you go, one large cappuccino.”

    Customer: “I didn’t order a cupachino! I ordered a mugachino! Where is my coffee?!”

    Me: “A mugachino refers to a cappuccino in the largest cup available, sir… That is a large cappuccino.”

    Customer: “I want a mugachino. Now go get me my d*** coffee!”

    Me: “Of course, sir, sorry about the mix up. I’ll get that right away.”

    (I walk around the corner to the coffee machine, sprinkle a bit more chocolate on top to make it look different and return with the same coffee.)

    Me: “Here you go, sir. One mugachino. I must have mixed your order up with another customer.”

    Customer: “About time… How hard was that? Gosh, I am never coming back here!”

    Refunder Blunder, Part 15

    , | Olympia, WA, USA | At The Checkout, Home Improvement

    (I work the return desk at a home improvement store that’s going out of business. We stop accepting returns unless the item was purchased prior to liquidation, and there are signs posted everywhere stating all sales are final. An elderly gentleman walks up to the desk with an item return.)

    Me: *checking receipt* “I see this is a purchase made after the liquidation process started. I’m afraid all sales are final.”

    Customer: *sputtering* “Well, you should have signs posted warning people!”

    (I show him where the signs are.)

    Customer: “THOSE weren’t there when I bought this!”

    Me: “They have been there over a month.

    Customer: “Well, you should print it on the receipts, so people don’t waste time!”

    (I take out his receipt and show him the text.)

    Customer: “YOU JUST PUT THAT ON THERE, YOU LITTLE B****!”

    Related:
    Refunder Blunder, Part 14
    Refunder Blunder, Part 13
    Refunder Blunder, Part 12

    Cappuccino-no

    , | SA, Australia | At The Checkout, Food & Drink

    (I’m waitressing when one of our baristas calls me over. She asks me to go to one of the tables and confirm that the elderly customer had ordered a long black and a cappuccino, as she had forgotten to write it down. The customer confirms this, and I take the order out to the customer and her husband who has now joined the table.)

    Me: “Okay, long black?”

    Customer: “Thank you.”

    Me: “And your cappuccino, sir.”

    Customer: “That was supposed to be a flat white!”

    Me: “I’m so sorry; I thought I confirmed with you that it was a cappuccino.”

    Customer: “Yes, but I forgot what my husband usually orders!”

    (The husband spoke up and half-heartedly told me a cappuccino will do. I apologised again and then walked off wondering what part I had to be sorry for!)

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