November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Category: At The Checkout

The customer has seemed normal and maybe even intelligent throughout the shopping purchase. But then they get to the checkout and as soon as human interaction is required it all falls apart. The checkout operators really are our first line of defense against the stupid customer!

A Sweet Gesture

| Aalst, Belgium | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers

(I am at the register. An older lady, visibly shaken up, approaches me.)

Me: “Can I help you, ma’am?”

Lady: “Yes, about half an hour ago, I bought my groceries here.” *shows me her receipt* “But when I was in the aisle, one of my bags broke. And to have my hands free I put this bar of chocolate in the pocket of my coat. I didn’t notice it until a few minutes ago.”

Me: “So you’ve come back… to pay for it?”

Lady: “Yes, I feel awful about it.”

Me: “Wow…  Just, wow. You are the first person to do that since I have worked here. I didn’t know people would do that!”

(I finished her transaction. If it hadn’t been company policy to not give things away, I would have given the chocolate to her for free. Thanks, lady, for showing there are decent, albeit unusual, people out there.)

Wish You Could Throw The Book At Him

| Canada | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior

(I work in a small book store, and since most customers don’t bother taking a bag if they’re only buying one book, I usually wait to see what they do. Most people just grab the book as soon as they’ve paid, but if they don’t, then I ask if they need a bag. No one has ever seemed to have an issue with this method… Until now.)

Me: “Hi, how are you?”

Customer: *ignores me, throws money down at the counter*

Me: “…”

(As the receipt prints off he starts to reach forward, so I assume he’s going to just grab the book and not take a bag, so I don’t bother offering one. Big mistake.)

Customer: *pulls hand back* “Well? Can I get a bag?”

Me: *taken aback by his nasty, snarky tone* “Uh, sure.”

Customer: “Do things not come with bags anymore?”

Me: “Yes, but most people don’t bother with one when they only have one item.”

Customer: “Well I’m not most people, am I?”

Me: *under my breath, to myself* “No, you’re not. You’re too much of an a**-hole.”

Immediately Discount Their Argument

| Auckland, New Zealand | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior

(I have served a customer and she has come back in with a malicious look on her face.)

Me: “What’s the issue, ma’am?”

Customer: You didn’t ask me for my discount card.”

Me: “Oh, my apologies. Unfortunately, I cannot do anything to give you that discount now because it has to go through the till first, but there is a number on the back of your card you can call and they can help you.”

Customer: “Why didn’t you ask me for it?”

Me: “It’s up to you to use it, I’m afraid.”

Customer: “I am going to need to take your name and managers number. Give it to me.”

Me: “You knew you had that card perfectly well. My name is not for you to know, and if you are here to stir trouble, I’m gonna have to ask you to leave.”

Customer: “This is outrageous! I did not come to this country to be treated like this by customer service!”

Me: “And I do not work my a** off seven days a week for people like you to come in here and attack me like this. Get out.”

An Oscar Major Weiner

| QLD, Australia | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Rude & Risque

(An older man comes in as I open the store. He seems innocent enough and is roughly 80 years old. When he comes up to the checkout we make idle chat, until I’ve scanned all of his groceries.)

Me: “That’ll be $42.99 today.”

Customer: “I won an Oscar. Do you want to see it?”

Me: “Sure!”

(He quickly runs out of the store, leaving his groceries there before shortly returning. He is holding a fake Oscar, but looks very proud so I humor him.)

Customer: “Look!”

Me: “It’s very nice. What did you win it for?”

Customer: “Read the inscription!”

(The inscription says “Longest Standing Member.” By now, I was confused out of my mind, until the old man snickered and moved his hand, revealing the statue had large private parts standing out.)

Me: *speechless, but quietly laughing*

Customer: “My wife got this for our anniversary!”

Just Popped Their Corn Bubble

| NY, USA | At The Checkout, Food & Drink, Movies & TV

(I’m working concession when I hear the following exchange between two customers standing about 10 feet in front of me looking at the menu-display we have above stand.)

Customer #1: “I think I’m gonna go for the medium popcorn.”

Customer #2: “Don’t do that! That’s just silly! Don’t you know movie-theater popcorn isn’t freshly made! It’s made days and days ahead of time and then shipped in from out-of-town, in big plastic garbage bags! You could be eating week-old popcorn if you get it at the movies!”

(I smirk and chuckle to myself, because we make fresh popcorn all day, every day with fresh and fairly expensive ingredients and most certainly don’t import week-old popcorn in garbage-bags. Our poppers are even visible in the back of concession if guests look hard enough.)

Customer #1: “That’s not true, is it?”

Customer #2: “It is! It’s part of their scam! This guy here knows it, and he doesn‘t care because he gets a cut of the big money they make from selling old food to innocent customers. It‘s highway robbery at it‘s finest.”

(I chuckle again considering I definitely haven’t gotten a cut of this non-existent “scam money” and am living check to check on minimum wage. I decide to have a little fun with the customers. I radio my manager, speaking just loud enough so that the customers can hear me.)

Me: *into radio* “Hey, I just wanted to double-check… Do you think I should make an extra batch of popcorn this morning just in case the next showtime sells out? I wanna make sure we have enough fresh popcorn ready.”

(Customer #2 hears and looks at Customer #1 with a scowl.)

Manager: *over radio* “If you think you should, go ahead. Nothing wrong with making another fresh batch just in case.”

(I turn and go into the back of concession while the two customers watch and put in fresh kernels and oil into the popper and start it, before turning it on.)

Customer #2: *quietly to her friend* “You see what he just did. It’s just special effects! We’re at the movies, after all. They pretend to make fresh popcorn, but all they sell is the cheap, old stuff!”

Customer #1: “Really? That’s just disgraceful. I’m going to call their corporate office and complain about this. It’s not right to scam their loyal customers like this!”

(They stormed off. I guess some people just HAVE to believe that they’re getting ripped off, even when they aren’t.)