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  • Bigotry Comes In All Shapes And Sizes
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    Category: At The Checkout

    The customer has seemed normal and maybe even intelligent throughout the shopping purchase. But then they get to the checkout and as soon as human interaction is required it all falls apart. The checkout operators really are our first line of defense against the stupid customer!

    A Price Shake-Down

    , | Anchorage, AK, USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Food & Drink, Money, Themed Giveaway, Top

    (I’m working the counter, and I see a six-year-old boy walk in with his mother. The mother sits in the back while the boy goes to the counter to make his order.)

    Me: “Hi, sweetie! What can I get you today?”

    Boy: “Can I please have a small orange-creme shake?”

    Me: “Of course. Anything else?”

    Boy: “No.”

    Me: “Alright, that’ll be one-ninety.”

    (The boy’s face crumples, and he backs away from the counter, walks in a circle, then looks back at me.)

    Boy: “What?”

    Me: “One-ninety?”

    (The boy begins crying, and rushes back to his mother.)

    Boy: “Mommy! I need $200 for my shake, and we don’t have that kinda money!”

    Mother: “What?”

    Me: “Wait, wait, no, sweetheart! I mean it’s one dollar and ninety cents!”

    Boy: “Oh, okay.”

    (After that, he pays for his shake and acts like absolutely nothing has happened.)

    Little Pony, Big Problem

    | USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Movies & TV, Themed Giveaway

    (I always try to make conversation with the customers, especially the kids. I notice that the young daughter of the family I’m ringing up is wearing a shirt bearing a picture of Fluttershy, one of the ponies from the new ‘My Little Pony’ cartoon.)

    Me: “I like your shirt, sweetheart! That’s Fluttershy, huh? Fluttershy’s my favorite pony!”

    (The little girl glares at me.)

    Me: “Is something wrong?”

    Girl: *crying* “You can’t have Fluttershy for your favorite, because Fluttershy is my favoritest pony ever, in the whole wide world! I like her way more than you could ever ever ever, and she’s my pony pal, not yours! I love Fluttershy, so you CAN’T!”

    Me: “Oh… uhm, can I say Pinkie Pie is my favorite then?”

    Girl: *sniffling, wiping her eyes* “Yeah. You can have Pinkie Pie.”

    The Light In A Polite Lite World

    | CT, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Family & Kids, Themed Giveaway

    (I work at a convenience store with a pharmacy. I’ve been working there for just about a year, and have given up completely on meeting a customer who’s nice to me. While I’m ringing people out, a boy about the age of eight or nine walks up to my register by himself.)

    Boy: *places Xbox live card on the counter* “Just this, please.”

    Me: “Sure.”

    (I ring him up and give him his total. It’s about $20.)

    Boy: “I’m sorry; I have about $15 in cash, but the rest is in quarters. Is that okay?”

    Me: *smiling* “That’s fine. Now I won’t need quarters later.”

    (The boy smiles and counts out his change. I finish the transaction and hand him the receipt with his card.)

    Me: “There you go. Have a nice day.”

    Boy: *smiling politely* “Thank you very much. You have a nice day too!”

    (He waves and smiles as he walks out. That boy restores my faith in humanity. He is now a regular at our store and I always love seeing him, still as polite as ever!)

    Named And Shamed

    , | Sandy, UT, USA | At The Checkout, Criminal/Illegal, Funny Names, Top

    (My debit card has just gone missing. I think I left it at the gas station after I got gas earlier, and now I’m at work. My name is a European variation of a common American name, and though spelled similarly, is quite different. For example, Kristen versus Kirsten. As such, when people read my name, they often use the American version. One of my coworkers calls me over using my nickname.)

    Coworker: “Hey, can you come here a moment?”

    Me: “Sure, what’s up?”

    Coworker: “This guy’s trying to use his girlfriend’s card.”

    (The customer slides a credit card over that looks familiar.)

    Me: “Uhm, can I see your ID?”

    Customer: “It’s my girlfriend’s card; she’s out in the car. I can go get her.”

    Me: “What’s her name?”

    Customer: “Kristen [Last-Name].”

    Me: “Spell her first name.”

    Customer: “Why?”

    Me: “Please?”

    Customer: *sighs* “K R I S T E N.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but she’s going to have to come in and authorize the purchase. I’ll keep the card in the back office until you get back.”

    Customer: “Give me the card, you b****!”

    Me: “I can’t do that when I know this card is stolen.”

    Customer: “It’s not stolen, c***! That’s my girlfriend’s card!”

    Me: “No. This is my card. As you can see, my name tag is spelled correctly, and you spelled it wrong. Also, if you were my boyfriend, I’d break up with you just for not knowing what my name was.”

    (I was very relieved to get my card back! Unfortunately, the customer had run up $300 worth of purchases, but luckily the restaurant I work at has a security camera, and we got his face on camera. I am later able to prove I didn’t make those purchases, so don’t have to pay for them!)

    Mom Is Bugging Out

    | Monroe, CT, USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Themed Giveaway, Top

    (My customer is a young high-school kid wearing a Pink Floyd t-shirt, hemp necklace, torn jeans, and sandals. He usually comes to my checkout line because I don’t give him a hard time when he buys a ton of munchies with very red eyes. This time he looks surprisingly sober.)

    Me: “Evening, pal, how’s it going?”

    Customer: “Ugh, not so great.”

    (He proceeds to put 16 cans of bug spray on the counter.)

    Me: “Yikes, got a bug problem?”

    Customer: “No, but my mom thinks we do. She doesn’t realize she accidentally ate one of my, uh, you know, special cookies, and I have to play along so she doesn’t figure out it’s not real.”

    (Years later, I returned to the area to find him wearing a suit and tie as store manager!)


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