Featured:
  • Raise A Broken Glass To That Employee
    (1,512 thumbs up)
  • August Theme Of The Month: Best. Customer. Ever!

    Category: At The Checkout

    The customer has seemed normal and maybe even intelligent throughout the shopping purchase. But then they get to the checkout and as soon as human interaction is required it all falls apart. The checkout operators really are our first line of defense against the stupid customer!

    An Oily Customer Slips Right Out

    | Australia | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Criminal/Illegal

    (Our supplier sent us bottles of sewing machine oil that, despite being sealed, turned out to be empty. Because the bottles are small and opaque we didn’t realise this until customers started bringing them back. A customer came into the store with a defective bottle.)

    Customer: “I had to drive all the way back to your store because this oil bottle was empty. You have no idea how much inconvenience you’ve caused me.”

    Me: “I’m very sorry for the inconvenience, ma’am. I can offer you either a bottle from the new batch or a refund; it’s up to you.”

    Customer: *looks at me as if I’ve asked a stupid question* “I’m obviously going to need more oil. I wouldn’t have bought it if I didn’t.”

    (I go and fetch a new bottle and place it on the counter.)

    Me: “There, you’re good to go. Once again, I’m very sorry for the inconvenience.”

    Customer: *looks at me and blinks*  “Aren’t you going to refund me?”

    Me: “Oh, you wanted a refund instead of a new bottle?”

    Customer: “Yes! Obviously!”

    (I process the refund and hand her the receipt.)

    Me: “There you go, all done!”

    (She snatches the receipt off me. She then picks up the new bottle of machine oil and starts to walk away with it.)

    Me: “Ma’am, wait! I gave you a refund; you can’t take the bottle, too!”

    Customer: “It’s compensation.”

    Me: “What for?”

    Customer: “For the inconvenience you caused me by making me come all the way back to your store.”

    Me: “Ma’am, you can’t just take that! It’s stealing!”

    (She stuck her nose in the air and walked out before anyone could stop her.)

    Ripping Your Credit To Pieces

    | Portland, OR, USA | At The Checkout, Liars & Scammers, Money

    (I am at the checkout and overhear this conversation between my manager and a customer she just finished helping.)

    Customer: “You gave me a ripped dollar bill. I need you to replace it.”

    Manager: “I didn’t give you the ripped bill.”

    Customer: “Are you trying to call me a liar? I want a manager!”

    Manager: “Ma’am, I am a manager, and you just paid with a credit card.”

    A Meaty Proposition

    | Albuquerque, NM, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

    (I work at a sub shop for about a year, where customers may have the employees customize their sandwich as it being made. A customer and presumably his girlfriend come in when it’s slow.)

    Customer: “Hey, I’m hungry.”

    Me: “Yes, sir, what would you like?”

    Customer: “Is this the stuff I can get?”

    (Gestures to the pans of food laid out for assembly.)

    Me: “Yes, sir, and here are the types of bread.”

    Customer: “Cool. I want wheat, and all the meats.”

    Me: “All of them?”

    Customer: “Yeah, I want all of these.”

    Me: “That’s going to be very expensive.”

    Customer: “Why?”

    (I don’t make the sandwich, instead calculating what the whole single sandwich would cost with every additional meat including steak, chicken, bacon, ham, salami, bologna, turkey, and tuna. Something like twenty five bucks. Once he hears that, he looks at me like I was eating live scorpions and shoos his lady-friend right out of the door.)

    Manager: *rubbing his temples* “I’m so glad I retire next month.”

    Nut A Good Idea

    , | FL, USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Food & Drink, Health & Body

    (I’m working the register at a sandwich shop.)

    Customer: *completely earnest* “I have a question about your cookies. I see here there are some labeled “White Chip Macadamia Nut.” Does that mean there are white chocolate chips and macadamia nuts?”

    Me: “I… uh… yes.”

    Customer: “So then I can’t give them to my son with a nut allergy, right?”

    Me: “That would be a bad idea, yes.”

    Customer: “All right, let me have one of those for me and one chocolate chip for my son.”

    Me: “I don’t think that would be a good idea, ma’am.”

    Customer: *getting irritated* “Well, why not? Do the chocolate chip cookies have nuts in them?”

    Me: “Well, no, but they do come into contact with nuts in several places. Like when we’re baking them, or when we use the same tongs to grab them. Or the display case in front of you where the chocolate chip cookies are touching the macadamia nut cookies…”

    Customer: “Fine, then, I won’t get him any cookies. Just give me my sandwiches and two small drinks.”

    Me: “Uh… I’m afraid I can’t do that either.”

    Customer: “Why the h*** not? I paid you didn’t I?!”

    Me: “Um… you haven’t ordered a sandwich yet.”

    (Luckily my manager came back from break and we were able to sort everything out before it escalated.)

    Cheerily Getting Her Way

    , | Australia | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

    (A man comes shopping with his adorable five year old daughter, and this happens as I’m serving him. Note: For those who don’t know, “cheerios” is a common name for cocktail frankfurts, which kids love.)

    Customer: “I’ll have 250g of that ham, please.”

    (The whole time I’m weighing and wrapping, his daughter is trying to get his attention.)

    Daughter: “Daaad. Dad. Cheerios, dad. Daaaaad…”

    Me: *hands over item* “Anything else?”

    Daughter: “Cheerios?”

    Customer: *smiling but still ignoring her* “Also a half kilo of chicken thighs.”

    Daughter: *hands on hips, looking at her father, but it was clear that she wanted me to hear her words* “Daddy, did you say CHEERIOS?”

    Me: *as I weigh and wrap* “She has the most adorable little attitude. Anything else?”

    Customer: “And a half kilo of cheerios… I’m going to have to watch out for her when she’s older, she’s too cute to say no to!”

    Me: “I think she knows it, too!”

    (The girl took the cheerios from me with a smug grin.)

    Page 4/276First...23456...Last