November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Category: At The Checkout

The customer has seemed normal and maybe even intelligent throughout the shopping purchase. But then they get to the checkout and as soon as human interaction is required it all falls apart. The checkout operators really are our first line of defense against the stupid customer!

In Addition, You’re An Idiot

| Baltimore, MD, USA | At The Checkout, Home Improvement, Liars & Scammers

(I am a cashier, with a customer hauling a rather expensive patio set along with some groceries in my line. I ring him up and show him the total.)

Customer: “That price is incorrect.”

Me: “I am very sorry, sir. I will have someone get a price check right away.”

(I have someone check the price of the patio set and it comes back the same as I had on the register.)

Me: “Sir, the price of that patio set is [price].”

(I show him the screen with a picture of his patio set and the price.)

Customer: “No, your total is wrong! I will show you!”

(The man then proceeds to take out a calculator and attempts to add up all his purchases.)

Me: “Sir, I can assure you the register has a built in calculator, so it does not make adding mistakes.”


(I have a rather long line building up by this point which has attracted the attention of one of my managers. She walks over and sees the man furiously typing away on his calculator.)

Manager: “Sir, what seems to be the problem here? Can I help you?”

Customer: “Your machine is broken!”

Manager: “What do you mean?”

Customer: “It’s not adding the total properly! This is very poor service!”

Manager: “One moment, sir.”

(My manager took me aside and told me to take my break. I did as she said, thankful to be out of there. Later, my manager came into the breakroom and told me that that was the third time that customer had done that in a week. Apparently he couldn’t afford the patio set so he thought he could swindle a cashier into giving it to him cheaper.)

How To Drive In The Tips

| Kirkland, WA, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Bad Behavior, Bigotry, Rude & Risque

(It is Halloween and I am working the overnight shift at my store. As the manager, I am required to do drive-thru since we are unusually busy as well as short staffed on Halloween night. I have just finished trick-or-treating with my godson and am still in my costume, which I am allowed to wear in place of my usual uniform. It is just after two am, and all the bars are closed, when I have a taxi pull to my window with three drunk men in the back. The cabbie is clearly frustrated and although I have no issues while taking their order, I grow concerned.)

Me: “You’re total is [total].”

(The men in the back start searching their pockets for money and after a minute passes, I start to get frustrated myself. We are slammed and I still have to help my coworker make the food, since it’s only the two of us. The man in the far right seat, furthest from me, finds his wallet and sticks out a bill. I lean out the window, almost climbing into the cab, and take the cash, all while the men are staring down my shirt in a none-too-discreet manner. As I’m cashing out the order, I count out the eighty some dollars in change while listening to them talk about what they’d love to do to me.)

Me: “Here’s your receipt and change. Would you like any ketchup?”

Drunk #1: “No, but I’ll take your number and you can keep the change.”

(I look down at the money and back at him.)

Drunk #2: “Only if you share her.”

(At this point, I’m clearly disgusted with them and I glance at the cabbie, who’s in the worse position of driving them home. Feeling bad, I grab a pen and write the store number on the back of the receipt with a fake name attached.)

Drunk #1: “Thanks, cutie. I’ll call you later.”

(I grab their food and bag an extra medium fry for the cabbie. I grab the money from my pocket and split it in half, shoving one half into the medium fry bag. I hand out their order and make sure the cabbie gets his food. He smiles and thanks me. Thinking nothing more of it, I go back to work. A few hours later, the cabbie comes back through.)

Me: “Hi, your total—” *seeing the cabbie* “Oh, hi! I hope you enjoyed the tip! I didn’t think they were likely to give you anything. They were real jerks.”

Cabbie: “I appreciated the gesture. I really just wanted to come back to give you this.”

(He hands me $150.)

Me: “Are you serious? You really don’t have to do that!”

Cabbie: “And they didn’t have to say the things they said. I just wanted to make sure you received a tip from someone who honestly appreciated your service. Thank you, and have a good rest of your day.”

Paperless Transaction

| Surrey, BC, Canada | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Awesome Workers

(When I process returns and exchanges, the register still gives me a total. Sometimes I like to have fun with this.)

Me: *processing an exchange* “Okay, that’ll be $0.00, please.”

Customer: *pretends to pull something out of his/her wallet and hands me air*

(It’s nice to know that some of my customers share the same sense of humor as I do.)

One Pint Of Stubbornness

| Scotland, UK | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Food & Drink, Money

(I work in a small independent pub which is near to several large chain pubs. As a result, people are sometimes put off by the fact we have slightly higher drink prices. Guinness is among one of the most expensive drinks we sell.)

Me: “Hi, sir, what can I get for you today?”

Customer: “Hi there. Can I have a pint of Guinness, please?”

(I go and pour half of his pint, before returning to charge him for it.)

Me: “That will be £3.90 please.”

Customer: “What?! That’s outrageous, you can get it for £3.40 across the road!”

Me: “I understand that. Unfortunately, as we are an independent pub, we cannot afford to match the prices of the larger chains, especially with the high buy in cost of Guinness.”

Customer: “Well, can’t you make it cheaper? It’s just absurd!”

Me: “No, I have absolutely nothing to do with the prices I’m afraid. We do have [large selection of other drinks] for a lot cheaper if you’d prefer.”

Customer: “No, I’ll have the Guinness, but that’s unacceptable! How can you charge that much?! I wouldn’t work somewhere that charges so much. It’s ridiculous!”

(I keep trying to explain to him why it is so expensive and offer him alternatives but with no success. He does however pay for his drink, and I place it in front of him.)

Customer: “It’s not that I can’t afford £3.90; I can!” *shows me the money in his wallet* “But it’s the principle! Just ridiculous. Where is your sink?”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “Your sink! I refuse to drink something that costs so much; it’s going down the drain!”

Me: “Sir, you’ve already paid for it. There is really no need for that.”

Customer: “Fine! I’ll chuck it down the toilet, then. I refuse to pay that much for a drink!”

(The customer then went to the bathroom and came back seconds later with an empty pint glass, ranting loudly about high prices and how we were all c***s for charging that much. I would understand if he’d refused to pay for the drink as some people do, but paying for it to chuck it down the toilet?)

Any Given Sundae

| Perth, WA, Australia | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Food & Drink

(I’m working drive-thru at a well known fast food place.)

Customer: “I’d like one large chocolate sundae, and one large sundae with chocolate or caramel on the bottom and chocolate or caramel on the top with extra chocolate or caramel. It doesn’t matter which one.”

Me: “So two large sundaes wi—”

Customer: “No, you’re not listening to me. One large chocolate sundae. One large sundae with chocolate or caramel on the bottom and chocolate or caramel on the top with extra chocolate or caramel. Either one.”

Me: “Okay. So in total you have tw—”


Manager: *signalling to me that the customer wants just one*

Me: “So you want one large sundae with chocolate on the bottom and caramel on the top with extra sauce?”

Customer: “YES. That wasn’t so hard, was it?”