Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Filled With Creamy Justice
    (1,959 thumbs up)
  • July Theme Of The Month: Animal Madness!
    Submit your story today!

    Category: At The Checkout

    The customer has seemed normal and maybe even intelligent throughout the shopping purchase. But then they get to the checkout and as soon as human interaction is required it all falls apart. The checkout operators really are our first line of defense against the stupid customer!

    Loony Over A Loonie

    | Ontario, Canada | At The Checkout, Canada, Top

    (I am ringing out an American girl. Keep in mind Canada uses coins for $1 and $2.)

    Me: “…and your change is $3.64. You have a wonderful day.”

    Customer: “Excuse me, you didn’t give me the right change.”

    Me: “Yes I did.”

    Customer: “No you didn’t. You only gave me coins, no paper.”

    Me: “Ma’am, we’re in Canada, and here we use coins.” *I hold up a $1 coin* “This is a loonie, and is worth $1.”

    Customer: “What’s a Canada?”

    The Spice Girls Have A Lot To Answer For

    | Toronto, ON, Canada | At The Checkout, Bizarre

    (I work in a very small café and there is a line heading out the door. A customer is ordering when a woman comes in and walks up to the front of the line.)

    Male Coworker: “Miss? There is a line.”

    Customer: “Ever heard of ‘ladies first’?”

    Male Coworker: “I understand that, ma’am, but you are also cutting in front of many other women who have been patiently waiting.”

    Customer: “I am a woman. I have rights! I don’t have to listen to you!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I’m afraid he’s right. You do need to go to the end of the line.”

    Customer: *looking disappointed* “But…but…what about girl power?”

    Try Telling That To The Banks

    | Garland, TX, USA | At The Checkout, Money

    (I am working the returns counter when a couple walks in with a set of weights.)

    Me: “How can we help you today?”

    Customer: “Yeah, we need to return this. It’s the wrong color.”

    Me: “Okay, do you have your receipt?”

    Customer: “Yes. But we’re going to do an exchange for something cheaper. Is it alright if we get what’s left over on a gift card?”

    Me: “Sure.”

    (The couple go shopping and come back. We go through the transaction.)

    Me: “Alright, so $60.00 will be credited back. Do you have the credit card you used?”

    Customer: “But we wanted the extra on a gift card.”

    Me: “Yes, but since theft is a common problem, it’s store policy to check your ID first.  I just need to verify that you have the original card.”

    Customer: “But we want the extra on a gift card.  Do you understand? What’s left over, on a gift card!”

    Me: “Yes, I understand, but I need to see the original card first.”

    Customer: “But I don’t have it. I don’t own that card!”

    Me: “Then I’m afraid we can’t do this transaction.”

    Customer: “No, you don’t understand. I want what’s left over on a gift card, so that my wife can use it!”

    Me: “Yes, but sir, it’s illegal for us to take somebody else’s money without their permission.”

    Customer: “God D*****! Since when do you need permission to get somebody else’s money?”

    Freudian (Pay) Slip

    | Latham, NY, USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids

    (I am ringing up a mother and her son.)

    Me: “Alright, ma’am, your total is $**.**.”

    Son: “Wow, that is so much money! You’re taking all my momma’s money!”

    Me: “Actually, your mother is paying for the items that she just purchased, and I’m not the one who gets the money anyways.”

    Son: “Do you think I’m dumb? You get all the money; why else would you be here?”

    Me: “The money that is paid here is made by the company. I’m here because the company pays me to check out customers.”

    Son: “That’s stupid. You should get to keep the money.”

    (As I’m about to respond, the mother chimes in.)

    Mother: “Just ignore him, he’s stupid.”

    They Must Have Learned From Vader’s Wheezing Problem

    | Calgary, AB, Canada | At The Checkout, Movies & TV

    (An angry looking young couple storms into the convenience store.)

    Man: “You sell cigarettes?”

    Me: “Yes.”

    Man: “You smoking b******!”

    Me: “I don’t smoke. I’m not the one that picks out the–”

    Woan: “That is f***ing illegal!”

    Me: “No, actually, it’s not.”

    (The woman pulls something out of her purse and writes a message on it. She slams it on the counter and she and her husband storm off. I look at it later and it is a picture of a Death Star. The message reads ‘This is coming to get you!’.)


    Page 184/195First...182183184185186...Last