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  • Bigotry Comes In All Shapes And Sizes
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    Category: At The Checkout

    The customer has seemed normal and maybe even intelligent throughout the shopping purchase. But then they get to the checkout and as soon as human interaction is required it all falls apart. The checkout operators really are our first line of defense against the stupid customer!

    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 8

    | Broomfield, CO, USA | At The Checkout, Money

    (A customer is paying her credit card bill.)

    Me: “Would you like to pay with cash, check, or debit card?”

    Customer: “I can pay with a debit card?”

    Me: “You sure can.”

    (The customer slides her card.)

    Customer: “I don’t remember my pin. I’ll just try one.”

    (The customer’s card is declined.)

    Me: “Do you want to try again?”

    Customer: “No, my mom will use her card.”

    (The customer’s mother tries, but she doesn’t remember her PIN either.)

    Me: “You can pay with cash or a check.”

    (The customer pulls a folded check from her pocket and hands it to me. I open it to see that it’s blank.)

    Me: “Um…”

    Customer: “Oh, am I supposed to fill that out?”

    Related:
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 7
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 6
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 5
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 4
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 3
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 2
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession

    Ignoring The Staff Is Its Own Reward

    | NC, USA | At The Checkout, Top

    (During the Christmas rush, a customer comes into my line talking on her cell phone.)

    Me: “Hello. Would you like a protection plan with this?”

    (Customer ignores me.)

    Me: “Do you have a rewards card with us, ma’am?”

    (Customer continues to ignore me.)

    Me: “Okay, here’s your receipt. Have a nice day!”

    (Customer stops talking on her phone and looks at me.)

    Customer: “What about my rewards card?”

    Me: “Well, I asked you if you had one, but you were too busy talking.”

    Customer: “So you’re saying it’s my fault?”

    Me: “Yes.”

    Discounted Intelligence

    | North Bay, ON, Canada | At The Checkout, Math & Science

    Me: “Hi, how are you today?”

    Customer: “I’m fine, and you?”

    Me: “Also fine, thanks for asking! Just to let you know everything in the store today is 40% off.”

    Customer: “What does that mean?”

    Me: “I….I don’t know how else to explain that to you.”

    The Customer Is Always Righteous

    | Boston, MA, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Religion

    (A regular customer comes into our store. She’s known to be very difficult to please.)

    Customer: “Good evening.”

    Me: *cheerily, while ringing her items up* “Good evening, ma’am! That’s $5.31, please.”

    (She puts a credit card down in front of me, which I ring through the register.)

    Me: “If you could please sign right there…”

    (I point, and she does. I bag her items and hand her the bag, her credit card, and her receipt. She takes them slowly and I think I’ve done a good job, but apparently not.)

    Customer: “You dishonor me! You dishonor me and you will burn for it!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am.”

    Customer: “God honors me! You don’t, and you will burn! I don’t know, I’m not God. But that’s what he’s saying. You dishonor me and you will burn!” *walks away*

    Me: *totally speechless*

    Batty Is In The Eye Of The Beholder

    | Toledo, OH, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre

    (I’m a customer at a grocery store. We’re in a snow storm and people have gone mad in preparation, buying most of the bread, eggs, and milk.)

    Customer: *inches from the cashier’s face* “MILK AND BREAD! MILK AND BREAD!”

    Cashier: *stunned*

    Customer: “I bet all the customers were like that today, huh? All those crazy people buying up all that stuff! But not me, I’m not crazy!” *walks away*

    Cashier: *nervously laughs while looking at me wide-eyed*


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