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    Category: Extra Stupid

    This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

    Christmas Day Meets Groundhog Day

    | St. Catharines, ON, Canada | Extra Stupid, Holidays, Money, Theme Of The Month

    (It is a very busy Sunday afternoon in the store. One of our staff is late due to bad weather and a dead car battery, so we are all rushed off our feet. I take a call.)

    Me: “[Store Name]. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

    Caller: “Yes. Hi. Do you have any sales going on with your Christmas dresses?”

    Me: “I’m afraid not, ma’am. There are no dresses on sale at the moment.”

    Caller: “How much are the dresses you have?”

    Me: “They range from $30 to $50, depending on the dress. But, we might be having a 40 percent off sale later this week. If you’d like to, call back then and check the dresses at that point.”

    Caller: “So, what sale do you have for your dresses right now? I want one just above the knee.”

    Me: “Well, most of our dresses fall just above the knee, ma’am. Like I said, we have no dresses on sale today, but we might have them on sale later this week.”

    Caller: “I’m going to a holiday party, you see, and I need a dress that falls above the knee.”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am. I understand. If you check back in a few days you might be able to get a dress for 40 percent off.”

    Caller: *finally clues in* “40 percent off you say? So what price would the dresses be then?”

    Me: “It would depend on the dress, ma’am. As I said, they range from $30 to $50.”

    Caller: “Oh, so how much would the $50 dollar dress be? I’m going to a holiday party and need a dress above the knee. You don’t have any dresses on sale today? Do you?”

    Me: *facepalm*

    Should Have Saved The Date In Their Advent Calendar

    | OH, USA | Extra Stupid, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    Me: “Hi, ma’am. Welcome to [Toy Store]. Can I help you find anything?”

    Customer: “Yeah. Do you guys still sell Advent calendars here?”

    (It’s December 10th, halfway through Advent.)

    Me: “Sorry, ma’am. We’ve been out of Advent calendars since mid-November. We didn’t even have any for Black Friday, unfortunately.”

    Customer: “So you don’t have any?”

    Me: “No. But we do them every year, so there’s already next year.”

    Customer: “Ah, shoot. I was really looking forward to getting one for the kids.”

    Me: “Yeah. With something like that I always recommend getting them as early as possible. Definitely before December.”

    Customer: “When is the next time you’ll be getting them in?”

    Me: “Next September.”

    An Upside Downside To Christmas

    | Brisbane, QLD, Australia | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (We sell Christmas-themed doughnuts. One looks like a Christmas tree, with a chocolate wafer stick as the trunk. On the display tray the trunk normally points towards the customer. I’ve just served someone who ordered one and changed their mind. I’ve hurriedly put it back, but the trunk is facing the wrong way, towards me.)

    Customer: “I want a tree, but do you have any that aren’t upside down?”

    Doesn’t Have A Glue

    | ON, Canada | Bizarre, Extra Stupid

    (We have bottles of hand sanitizer at the pick-up and drop off counters for customers to use if they please.)

    Me: “Hi. Can I help you?”

    Customer: “WHAT DID I JUST PUT ON MY HANDS?”

    Me: “Er, what?”

    Customer: *waving hands frantically* “What’s in that bottle? It’s not glue is it? My hands aren’t going to stick to my cart when I touch it?”

    Me: “No, ma’am. It’s just hand sanitizer.”

    Customer: “Oh, okay. Thanks! Have a good day!”

    (The customer leaves without getting anything from the dispensary.)

    Me: *to coworker* “Why the h*** would we have glue in squirt bottles?”

    Should Take A Brake From Driving

    | Kennewick, WA, USA | Extra Stupid, Family & Kids, Health & Body

    (Whenever we have a child that seems to be too short to ride the go-karts, we tell the parents we need to size them on one of the karts. Doing so with her mother watching over my shoulder, this little girl is barely too short to press the brake pedal hard enough.)

    Me: “I’m sorry. She’s not quite tall enough. She can reach the gas, but can’t press the brakes hard enough.”

    Mother: “So…?”

    Me: “I can’t let her ride.”

    Mother: “But she can press the pedals. Yes?”

    Me: “Yes, but she can’t press the brake pedal hard enough to engage it. It takes a bit of pressure.”

    Mother: “So why can’t she go? If she can press the pedals, then she can make the kart go.”

    Me: “Yes… but she couldn’t get the brakes to work.”

    Mother: “But she can go! So what if she doesn’t press the brakes enough?”

    Me: “…she won’t be able to slow or stop without them.”

    Mother: “Oh! That’s what that does?”

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