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    Category: Extra Stupid

    This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

    Putting Themselves Into A Sticky Spot

    | Bismarck, ND, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Liars & Scammers, Theme Of The Month

    Customer: “I’d like to return this game.”

    (He hands me a sports title, which is several years old.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but we don’t accept open game returns, particularly games purchased at a competing store.”

    Customer: “I purchased the d*** thing here!”

    Me: “I’m afraid you didn’t. We don’t open games and put [competing company]‘s stickers on the cases.”

    Customer: “Well, why the f*** not?”

    Putting The Ink Into Think

    | Edinburgh, Scotland, UK | Extra Stupid, Technology

    (We are the IT support for the British Army. Units not in our immediate area have to bring the equipment into our workshops for us to look at it. One day, we get a laptop printer brought in from a town quite a distance away. My workshop manager decides to look at it himself as it’s a slow day. The printer is picking paper up but not actually printing anything on it.)

    Manager: “Easiest job I think we’ve ever had. Would you contact the unit to send someone to pick it up?”

    Me: “What was the problem with it?”

    Manager: “The owner forgot to remove the plastic strip from the bottom of his new ink cartridge!”

    (The printer was returned with half a ream of test printouts which all read: ‘I must remove all packaging from the printer cartridges.’ The soldier who had to make two round trips of over 60 miles was not best pleased!)

    Won’t Like The State Of The Pizza

    | Greeley, CO, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Geography

    (I am a delivery driver on a delivery, and am unable to find the house that I am looking for, so I call the customer for help.)

    Customer: “Hello?”

    Me: “Hi. This is the delivery driver in charge of delivering your pizza. Unfortunately, I’m a little stuck. I can’t seem to find your house. Could you verify your address for me?”

    Customer: “Yeah, no problem! It’s [address].”

    Me: “Okay. Well, that’s the same address that I have and I’m pretty sure I’m in the right place but I don’t see that address.”

    Customer: “Oh, it’s pretty hard to see my house at night especially because there are no street light near me. I’ll come outside to meet you.”

    (I am thoroughly confused by this because it is only six pm and the sun is still up.)

    Me: “Excuse me, but it sounded like you said it was dark out so I wasn’t able to see your house?”

    Customer: “Yeah. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you or anything.”

    Me: “No, no. That’s not the problem. Could you tell me what city your in?”

    Customer: “Um… I’m in Boston, Massachusetts. Where the h*** are you?”

    Me: “Sir, you called the [Pizza Shop] in Greeley, Colorado.”

    Customer: “Oh… I was wondering why the area code wasn’t normal.”

    It’s Off Season

    | Vancouver, BC, Canada | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    Customer: “I see that your chicken caesar salads come with either cajun or garlic chicken. I don’t like garlic and I don’t like spice, so can I just get plain chicken?”

    Me: “Of course. I’ll let the kitchen know. So, absolutely no seasoning on it?”

    Customer: “Yes, thank you.”

    Me: *after the customer has received her food* “How is your salad tasting?”

    Customer: “It’s fine, but the chicken is a little bland.”

    Health Conscious Mosquitoes Source Their Food

    | Dominican Republic | Extra Stupid, Health & Body, Tourists/Travel

    (My wife and I are on vacation in a resort. We just had a ‘new arrivals’ meeting, and were told about possible malaria infection from mosquitoes. We both took the appropriate medication before traveling, but not everyone agrees that it is indeed necessary.)

    Tourist: “Taking that medication is not necessary you know. I should know, since I work for [our country's health regulation service]. Every person that has contracted malaria while on holiday here was from [a certain province]. Since we are from [another province] there are absolutely no risk!”

    (We laughed so hard we had to leave the room, and are still wondering how the mosquitoes manage to determine the province of origin of the tourist they are about to feast on…)


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