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    Category: Extra Stupid

    This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

    Taxing Faxing, Part 13

    , | Salt Lake City, UT, USA | Extra Stupid, Money, Technology

    (Customers will call to purchase service contracts for their mobile phones.)

    Me: “Sorry, sir, but after your credit check, I am afraid that you will have to pay a deposit.”

    Customer: “How?”

    Me: “We can take payment usually over the phone. Or there is also a payment form that can be downloaded, printed, and either faxed or mailed to us.”

    Customer: “Okay, I’ll fax it!”

    (The customer ended up faxing cash. That’s right, cash. He FAXED us four $100 bills! And then just couldn’t understand when we told him it wasn’t a valid method of payment…)

    Related:
    Taxing Faxing, Part 12
    Taxing Faxing, Part 11
    Taxing Faxing, Part 10

    Not In A Good State To Come In

    | Raleigh, NC, USA | Extra Stupid, Geography, Time

    (I am working the front desk, and the phone rings. It is about 2:45 in the afternoon.)

    Caller: “Hi. I was wondering if [Stylist] has any appointments today.”

    Me: “Sorry, we don’t have a stylist by that name here, but I could make you an appointment with someone else. The earliest we can fit you in is 3:15.”

    Caller: “Great, I’ll take it.”

    (I make the appointment. 3:15 comes, and the girl does not show up. At 3:30 I give her a call back.)

    Me: “Hi, [Caller]. Are you still planning to come in?”

    Caller: “Yeah, 3:15 right?”

    Me: “Yes, but it’s 3:35 now.”

    Caller: “No, it’s only 12:35.”

    Me: “This is [Salon] in Raleigh, North Carolina.”

    Caller: “Oh… I’m in Idaho.”

    Business Center Is Out Of Business

    | USA | Extra Stupid, Hotels & Lodging, Technology, Wild & Unruly

    (The door to our business center is always closed and locked to keep out non-guests who have, in the past, put viruses on the computers. To open it, the guest must ask the front desk. There is a sign.)

    Guest: *tries to open the door* “Come ON!”

    Me: “Sir—”

    (The guest begins punching the door so violently that the door and door lock instantly break. As if nothing has happened, the guest wanders back to the front desk.)

    Guest: “The business center door is broken.”

    Me: “Gee, I wonder why…”

    Crime Has Reached A Tipping Point

    , | YK, Canada | Criminal/Illegal, Extra Stupid, Money

    (I’m at a local fair selling my arts and crafts. One of the things I do is make pins on the spot for people, and I have a sample of each pin design on display on a board. They’re very popular with kids as they’re only $2 each, so there are a few kids at the table. Most are pretty young, but this one was about 10.)

    Older Kid: “Can I have a pin of [design]?”

    Me: “Sure! $2 please!”

    Older Kid: *puts a $5 bill on the table*

    Me: “Okay, just one second. Let me just make it for you!”

    (I make the pin, and then hand it to the kid and pick up the $5.)

    Me: “Here you go, kiddo! Let me just get you your change!”

    Older Kid: “Thanks!” *he looks at the board, then suddenly grabs a display pin and RUNS from the table*

    Husband: *sitting next to me* “… Did he just steal a pin?”

    Me: *holds up the $5 bill* “Looks more like he tipped us!”

    The Purple Flower Eater

    | USA | Bigotry, Extra Stupid, Home Improvement, Pets & Animals

    Manager: *answering phone* “[Complex Manager]’s office. This is [Manager].”

    Resident: “Someone dug up my flowers! The purple ones! It’s because purple is the gay color. They think I’m gay, and they hate me, so they dug up my flowers!”

    Manager: “Slow down, [Resident]. Who dug up your flowers?”

    Resident: “People who hate me because they think I’m gay!”

    Manager: “O… kay. When did you plant these flowers?”

    Resident: “Yesterday. I had that row of white flowers, and I planted the purple ones in between. It went white, purple, white, purple. But they only dug up the purple ones!”

    Manager: “Did you do anything special when you planted the purple ones?”

    Resident: “Well, yes. I put some fish pieces in the soil because I heard that it was supposed to help the plants grow.”

    Manager: “… [Resident], I think that raccoons dug up your flowers to get at the fish.”

    Resident: “What? No, that can’t be. Raccoons are very respectful of nature. They wouldn’t do that.”

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