October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

Category: Extra Stupid

This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

Ensuring A Lack Of Insuring

| WI, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Health & Body, Money

Me: “Hi, how can I help you?”

Customer: “I would like to pick up my prescription.”

Me: “Okay, what is your last name?”

Customer: “[Name].”

Me: “I notice that we have not run insurance on this. Let me look into that.”

(I pull her up on the computer and notice we do not have any insurance information on file.)

Me: “We do not have insurance on file for you. Do you have insurance you would like us to bill?”

Customer: “Yes.”

(Usually the customer gets a card out so I give her some time, but she just stares at me waiting, so I ask:)

Me: “Do you have the card with you?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: “Right now this costs $89.75, but your insurance should bring that down. We will need the insurance information located on your card to bill them. Would you like some time to go get it?”

Customer: “It has never cost more than $5 before.”

Me: “Okay, hold on.”

(I look to see if we have another file for her that may have her insurance listed but none come up.)

Me: “I’m sorry we don’t have your insurance information. Have you filled with us or at another location? Or could it be under a different last name?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: *frustrated at this point* “Okay, then, there are a few options. You can find your insurance card and we can run it through, or you can pay the $89.75 and come back later with the insurance card for a refund. We have seven days to do a refund in store. After that we would have to send it to corporate and it could take several weeks.”

Customer: “”But it has never cost more than $5.”

Me: “I understand. I am sure the price will go down as soon as we get your insurance information. Would you like to go get your card?”

Customer: “I don’t have a card. I’ve never had a problem before.”

Me: “Where did you get your prescription last?”

Customer: “[Different pharmacy].”

Me: “We are not connected with them and cannot access their files.” *I give her the two options again*

Customer: “This is ridiculous; it should only be $5! You should have my insurance!”

Me: “Actually it is your responsibility to carry your insurance card. Most people carry them in their wallet.”

Customer: *walks away*

Coworker: “She must think your name tag says magician not technician.”

Missed Out On The iFad

| UK | Extra Stupid, Technology

Me: “[Support], how can I help?”

Customer: “My iPad won’t connect to the wifi in the hotel!”

Me: “Okay, any error messages?”

Customer: “Nope.”

Me: “Okay, I need your MAC address to see if you’re associated with our network. Go to settings/general/wifi address.”

Customer: “I don’t have general.”

Me: “Okay, you should have. Settings/general. Fourth option down?”

Customer: “No, not there.”

Me: “What have you got?”

Customer: “Settings/more networks.”

Me: “You sure it’s an iPad?”

Customer: “Yes, it’s got Samsung on the back!”

Misunderstanding Free Trade

| MI, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

Customer: “I want a cup of 2% milk with four pumps of chocolate in it.”

Me: “What size would you like?”

Customer: “The size that’s free.”

Me: *thinking I misheard, or maybe she’s joking* “I’m sorry, what?”

Customer: “Whatever size is free! I want that size!”

Me: “Um, we don’t have a ‘free cup of chocolate milk’ in any size.”

Customer: “Don’t lie to me! I know that’s why you have the milk out on the condiment bar! But I want 2%, not creamer!”

Me: “That’s for customers to put in their coffee. It’s not so you can make free cups of chocolate milk.”

(It took me almost 10 minutes to convince her I wasn’t going to make her a free cup of chocolate milk.)

Confused To The Nines

| PA, USA | Extra Stupid, Time

Me: *answering phone* “Hello, thank you for calling [Store]. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Customer: *clearly a young teenage guy* “Uh…yeah, I was just wondering what time you are open until today.”

(Note, it is currently 9:30 am.)

Me: “We are open until nine today.”

Customer: “Nine in the morning or, like, nine?”

Someone In The Background: “Dude! Did you seriously just ask that?”

Me: *stifling laughter* “Nine at night, sir.”

Customer: “Oh, okay…”

Me: “Was there anything else I can help you with?”

Customer: “No… no… that’s all.”

Failed With Flying Colors

| Wollongong, NSW, Australia | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid

(Our jewellery cabinet is sorted into a colour display with each shelf being solely dedicated to one colour. A customer beckons me over.)

Customer: “Excuse me, I’d like to look at the turquoise jewellery please.”

Me: “Of course, which ones would you like to see?”

Customer: *pointing at the turquoise shelf* “The turquoise ones.”

Me: “Which ones in particular?”

Customer: *pointing again* “The turquoise jewellery.”

Me: “Ma’am, all of the jewellery on that shelf is turquoise. I’m finding it hard to see which one in particular you’re looking at. Would you be able to describe it for me?”

Customer: “Oh, of course they are!”

(She bends towards the shelf, squints at it, and jabs the glass with her finger.)

Customer: “The turquoise one!”

Me: “…”

(Ten minutes later we figured it out.)

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