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    Category: Extra Stupid

    This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

    Beat The Clock

    | OH, USA | Extra Stupid, Time, Top

    (I work as a clockmaker. I phone a customer while standing at their front door after no response to the door bell:)

    Me: “Hello, this is [My Name]. I’m here for your service call.”

    Customer: “Well, I’m not home. I waited until 4:15 and you never showed up, so I left.”

    Me: “You waited until 4:15 today?”

    Customer: “Yes. You were supposed to be here at 3 and I waited until 4:15.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but your appointment was set for between 3 and 5, not at 3. Also, it’s only just now 3:20.”

    Customer: “What do you mean 3:20?”

    Me: “The time. It is currently only 3:20 pm.”

    Customer: “When I looked at the clock it said 4:15!”

    Me: “By chance, would that be the clock I was coming to fix?”

    Customer: “… Yes.”

    Made An A** Out Of Just You

    | Toronto, ON, Canada | Extra Stupid, Money

    (I work in a call centre quality assurance and I listen to the following call about a nationwide mail-in rebate campaign:)

    Irate Customer: “You guys told me I’d get a gift card for gas, and what I’m getting in mail today is some stupid rebate voucher that I have to mail back to you to get my money!”

    Agent: “I apologize, sir. This is an unusual instance of misinformation. Are you sure the agent you talked to before spoke about a gift card? Or about a rebate voucher?”

    Customer: “She talked about a voucher!”

    Agent: “Oh, so, you did know this was a voucher, not a gift card?”

    Customer: “Well, she did say a voucher, but I ASSUMED it was a gift card!”

    Social Insecurity, Part 3

    | NV, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

    (I’m one of the owners of a rental company. I had just finished setting up the unit, going over the rental agreement with the customer, and swiping his credit card on my phone.)

    Me: “Okay, sir, would you like us to email you a receipt?”

    Customer: “I really don’t like giving out my email address.”

    Me: “…I just ran your credit card on my phone.”

    Related:
    Social Insecurity, Part 2
    Social Insecurity

    Lost In Holy Translation

    | Australia | Books & Reading, Extra Stupid, Religion

    Me: “Hi! How can I help you?”

    Customer: “Hey, do you have The Bible?”

    Me: “Yeah, heaps. Let me—”

    Customer: “No.” *looking at phone* “I need The Bible by the author… King James!”

    Me: “…”

    Customer: “Do you have it?”

    Me: “Sure…”

    An Alarming Lack Of Responsibility

    | SC, USA | Extra Stupid

    (My coworker and I are closing up the store. The store is closed the next day, so we were admittedly a little eager to get home to start relaxing. I accidentally leave the front door unlocked in my rush to get home. We have several signs saying we are closed on Sunday. Apparently at around noon on Sunday, a customer gets into the store, starts browsing, and ends up setting the alarms off and running out. A few days later, the same coworker and I are working when a customer comes in.)

    Me: “Hello! Do you need help finding anything today?”

    Customer: “Not really, but I was the one who set off those alarms and never got to get the treats I came in for!”

    Me: “Well, we were closed, sir.”

    Customer: “How was I supposed to know that?!”

    Me: “Sir, did you not notice the signs on the door, the hours posted, the fact that the lights were off, and that the store was completely empty?”

    Customer: “No! It shouldn’t be my responsibility to keep track of your hours! It’s your responsibility to tell me when you’re open or not!”

    Coworker: “Sir, that’s what the signs are for. We can’t be here all the time to let people know we’re open.”

    Customer: “Well, you should be!”

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