July Theme Of The Month: Great Timing!

Category: Extra Stupid

This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

Her Shipping Method Is Full Of Holes

| Jacksonville, FL, USA | Extra Stupid, Transportation

Customer: “Hi, I’d like to ship this textbook.”

Me: “I can help you with that, ma’am. I would suggest, however, purchasing a mailer or box to ship it in. This box is not made for shipments.”

Customer: “What! Why can’t I use this?!”

Me: “Because it’s a Krispy Kreme donut box.”

Cereally Stupid, Part 2

| USA | Extra Stupid

(I am working in the housewares section. A customer approaches; she is holding a clear plastic container.)

Customer: “Do you have any of these in a larger size?”

Me: “Yes, there are some right here.”

(I point to the container. It has a picture of cereal on the front, but it’s obviously empty.)

Customer: “Well, I’m not going to buy it if it comes with cereal in it! That’s just stupid!” *angrily walks away*

Related:
Cereally Stupid

E Pluribus Dumbum, Part 2

| Berkshire, England, UK | Extra Stupid, History

(Our museum has a big display of Roman materials. I’m sitting in the second room: a room full of mosaics. Next door is the first room: a room full of Roman tools. We have an example of almost every Roman tool I’ve ever seen. A lady and her daughter walk out of the first room, into the second.)

Daughter: “How did they make all of these things, mummy?”

Lady: “All of them BY HAND! The Romans had NO tools!”

Related:
E Pluribus Dumbum

Not The PIN-nacle Of Intelligence

| Athens, GA, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Language & Words, Money

(I have finished scanning the customer’s items at the register.)

Me: “Your total come to [price].”

(The customer pulls out a card to pay.)

Me: “What kind of card is it?”

Customer: “Debit.”

(I hit the debit key on my register. She proceeds to swipe it on her side, and I turn to finish bagging her groceries.)

Customer: “This thing isn’t working!”

(I turn back to see her holding the machine’s electronic pen, looking frustrated.)

Me: “I’m sorry; did it not read your card? These things get temperamental sometimes.”

Customer: “No, it read the card. But it’s not doing anything!”

Me: “Hmm. Well, what does the screen say?”

Customer: “It just says to enter my PIN.”

Me: “Well then, just enter your PIN, ma’am.”

Customer: “I did that twice, and it didn’t take it! It’s not working!”

(The customer proceeds to demonstrate, by WRITING her PIN on the screen with the pen.)

Me: “Um, no, ma’am. You use the buttons to type it in. The screen can’t read hand writing.”

They Are In The Lower Percentile

| CT, USA | Extra Stupid, Math & Science, Money

(I’m a sales associate at a popular clothing store. I’m in the middle of an eight-hour shift on Black Friday, when a customer calls on the phone. The customer speaks in a very confused tone the entire time.)

Me: “Hi, thank you for calling [store]! This is [name] speaking; what’s on your wish list?”

Customer: “Hi. So you guys are having a sale, right?”

Me: “Yep! Everything is 40% off today!”

Customer: “Okay. So is that 40% off our entire purchase, or 40% off each individual item or our purchase?”

(Thinking I must have heard her incorrectly, I just repeat myself)

Me: “Right, everything in the store is 40% off today.”

Customer: “Okay. Well, whoever rang me up today clearly did it wrong. They rang my entire purchase as 40% off, instead of each item separately as 40% off.”

Me: “Well, that adds up to the same thing.”

Customer: “Wait, really?”

Me: “Yes. 40% off the entire purchase is the same thing as 40% each thing in the purchase.”

Customer: “Oh… thanks.”

(The customer hangs up. My coworker is staring at me.)

Coworker: “Please tell me that did not just happen.”

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