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    Category: Extra Stupid

    This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

    Disturbingly Dense

    | MA, USA | Extra Stupid

    (I’m working the day shift at a hotel. One day, I get a page from the front desk.)

    Coworker: “This is going to seem like a weird request.”

    Me: “Okay, what’s up?”

    Coworker: “Well, the lady in room [#] needs you to show her how to use the ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign.”

    Me: “You’re kidding, right?”

    Coworker: *laughs* “I’m afraid not.”

    (I go to the guest’s room and knock on her door. A lady in her 50s comes to the door holding a little cardboard ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign.)

    Guest: “How do I work this?”

    (I take the sign and put it on the door handle.)

    Guest: “Oh, so that’s how that thing works!”

    Now, Wait Just A New York Minute

    | USA | Extra Stupid

    (I work in a call center taking customer care calls for cell phones.)

    Me: “Welcome to [store]. How can I help you?”

    Customer: “Yes, I am going to Ireland and I want to know the per minute rate.”

    Me: “Yes, thats no problem. The per minute rate to Ireland is $0.99 per minute.”

    Customer: “Is that an Irish minute or an American minute?”

    Me: *confused* “Miss, a minute is a minute no matter where you are.”

    Customer: “No, it’s not! You’re just trying to get my bill higher than it should be! I will report you to the BBB!”

    Thank You, Please Call Again

    | Deschutes, OR, USA | Extra Stupid

    Caller: “Why don’t you have your phone number listed on your site? I hunted all over the place for it. I finally had to call information to get the number!”

    Me: “With all due respect sir, we do have the number on the site.”

    Caller: “You do not! And I still have the page up on the screen on my computer. I can prove it!”

    Me: “You do? Sir, could you please do me a favor and go look at our page on the screen?”

    Caller: “Well, fine, but I don’t see where that’s going to help any!”

    Me: “Sir, please…if anything, just humor me. Please go look at our page on your computer.”

    Caller: “Well, okay. I am here now. What did you want to show me?!”

    Me: “Look at the beginning of the page. It’s in great big bold letters, right about eye level. Please tell me, what does it say?”

    Caller: “It says, ‘To Contact Us, Please Call 877-77…”

    *pause*

    Caller: *hangs up*

    Yes, Master

    | Denver, CO, USA | Extra Stupid, Funny Names

    Me: “I would be happy to process that payment for you today. First, could I have the name exactly how it appears on the card?”

    Customer: “Master Card.”

    Me: “Oh, no, I’m sorry. I am looking for the human’s name that is on the card.”

    Customer: “Capital One.”

    Me: “No, not that one; the human’s name that is on the card.”

    Customer: “I already told you, it’s Master Card!”

    Water You, Stupid, Part 9

    | Texas, USA | Extra Stupid

    (I work at a home improvement store selling appliances. I receive a call from a very upset customer.)

    Me: “Thank you for calling [store]. How can I help you today?”

    Customer: “Yeah, I picked up a fridge yesterday. It has been 24 hours and hasn’t made any ice.”

    Me: “Okay, sir, we’re going to run troubleshooting. Is the fridge getting power?”

    Customer: “Of course it’s plugged in. What do you think I am, an idiot?”

    Me: “Sorry, sir. I’m just trying to troubleshoot. Is the water supply to the fridge working?”

    Customer: “What water supply?”

    Me: “Well, sir, you have to connect the fridge to a water line for it to be able to make ice.”

    Customer: “Are you kidding me? I have to hook up the fridge to water? I thought it just made ice.”

    Me: “Well, sir, it can’t pull water straight from the air.”

    Customer: “Running water to a fridge…I don’t understand why these companies have to make things so complicated these days!” *hangs up*

    Related:
    Water You, Stupid, Part 8
    Water You, Stupid, Part 7
    Water You, Stupid, Part 6
    Water You, Stupid, Part 5
    Water You, Stupid, Part 4
    Water You, Stupid, Part 3
    Water You, Stupid, Part 2
    Water You, Stupid

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