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    Category: Extra Stupid

    This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

    Stop And Stair, Part 3

    | Boone, NC, USA | Extra Stupid, Hotels & Lodging

    Customer: “What’s up there?” *pointing at the stairs*

    Me: “Those stairs take you to the second floor and the breakfast area.”

    Customer: “So, like, if we walk up those stairs, we’ll be on the second floor?”

    Me: “Yes, that’s generally what happens when you go up stairs.”

    Customer: “That’s so cool! They’ve got stairs and an elevator!”

    Related:
    Stop And Stair, Part 2
    Stop And Stair

    Same Difference

    | Portsmouth, UK | Extra Stupid

    (We have an offer on in store: buy one backpack, get another backpack free. A customer comes to me to pay for one backpack and a pair of shoes.)

    Me: “Sorry, but the promotion only works when you buy two backpacks. You will then get one of them free.”

    Customer: “Oh, I see. So it’s just backpacks…just backpacks…just backpacks…backpacks.”

    (The customer wanders off, presumably in search of another backpack. She eventually returns.)

    Customer: “This, please.” *shows me a belt*

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, the belt isn’t in the deal.”

    Customer: “But I’m buying a backpack…A BACKPACK! You said it was free with a backpack!”

    Me: “I’m sorry. What I meant was that you can get a free backpack with your other backpack.”

    Customer: “Oh, okay.”

    (The customer wanders off again, and once again returns with a new item.)

    Customer: “I’ll just take these, then.” *shows me a pair of shoes*

    Me: “Those aren’t in the deal either, I’m afraid. It’s only backpacks.”

    Customer: “But it’s two of the same! You said they had to be the same!”

    (After going back and forth for another 5 minutes, I finally take her to pick out a backpack, specifically. She pays and leaves, still mumbling about “two of the same”.)

    It Keeps Saying Error

    | Eau Claire, WI, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

    (I work in a cell phone store. From time to time, we have to fix phones for people. Today, an elderly woman is asking me to look at her phone.)

    Customer: “There is something wrong with my phone. Could you fix it for me?”

    Me: “Sure, what’s it doing?”

    Customer: “Well, it won’t make any phone calls.”

    Me: “No problem. Can I see your phone for a moment?”

    (The customer digs through her purse, pulls out a calculator, and hands it to me.)

    Customer: “See, I punch in a phone number and nothing happens.”

    Me: “Erm, did you grab this by mistake? This is a calculator, not a cell phone.” *hands back the calculator*

    (The customer takes the calculator back, looks at it, then looks at me blankly before walking away.)

    Brakes Can Drive You Crazy

    | Austin, TX, USA | Extra Stupid

    (My manager is talking to a customer about what they need fixed on their car. I often eavesdrop so I can hear from a person’s own words what is wrong. It often helps me to diagnose the problem.)

    Customer: “The truck isn’t running right. It doesn’t have power and runs rough.”

    Me: “Well, when do you notice the problem?’

    Customer: “When I’m slowing down.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, it doesn’t have power when braking? ”

    Customer: “Yes.”

    Me: “Do you mean the brakes don’t feel right?”

    Customer: “No.”

    Me: “What about when you get back on the gas pedal? Does it go fine?”

    Customer: “Oh, yes it has plenty of power then.”

    Me: “So, when you are on the brakes and slowing down, the truck doesn’t have power, but when you get back on the throttle it has plenty of power?”

    Customer: “Exactly.”

    Me: *speechless*

    (We take the car in and run full diagnostics. I never found anything wrong with the truck. It ran like it was brand new and had very few miles on it.)

    Some Things Just Don’t Add Up

    | Baltimore, MD, USA | Extra Stupid, School

    (I work in the testing center for a community college. We administer placement exams and make-up exams, among other things. This particular student is taking his placement exam.)

    Me: “Okay, sir, I have you set up on that computer over there.” *points to computer* “Just finish filling in your personal information and the test will begin.”

    Student: “Okay, thanks.”

    (About forty-five minutes go by as the student goes through the exam. I then see him raise his hand, so I stand up and walk over to his computer.)

    Me: “Is there something wrong?”

    Student: “Yeah, it’s telling me that I’m about to start the arithmetic test.”

    Me: “Yes, that is part of the placement exam.”

    Student: “But I’m supposed to be taking a math test, not an arithmetic test!”


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