Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Crime Can Be A Vicious Cycle
    (1,709 thumbs up)
  • October Theme Of The Month: Coupon Complications!
    Submit your story today!

    Category: Extra Stupid

    This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

    Time To Sign Up For Delivery By Delorean

    | USA | Extra Stupid, Time, Top

    (I’m answering the main line at a busy newspaper on a Saturday.)

    Me: “[Newspaper], this is [name].”

    Caller: “Yeah, it’s dark out.”

    Me: “…Okay?”

    Caller: “Yeah, it’s… what time is it?”

    Me: “It’s 10:12 p.m., sir.”

    Caller: “Yeah, it’s 10:12 p.m. and I still haven’t gotten my Sunday paper.”

    Me: “Sir, it’s 10:12 p.m. on Saturday. We’re still making the Sunday paper.”

    Caller: “But I haven’t gotten my Sunday paper!”

    Me: “Yes, sir, I understand. That’s because it’s Saturday. Your Sunday paper will be delivered as usual in the morning.”

    Caller: “But it hasn’t arrived yet!”

    Me: “It’s still Saturday night. The Sunday edition will arrive Sunday morning.”

    Caller: “I haven’t gotten… oh, wait. It’s Saturday?”

    Me: “Yes, sir.”

    Caller: “Oh. Well, then… I’ve been working nights. I’m very confused about things now. I just knew it was dark.”

    Me: “Not a problem, sir.”

    Caller: “This never happened.”

    Me: “Deal.”

    Some Things Just Don’t Add Up, Part 8

    | Somerville, MA, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Math & Science, Money

    Customer: “Can I get two pounds of potato salad? The one on sale.”

    Me: “Sure thing!”

    (At our store, the salad containers come in three sizes. The largest one holds roughly two pounds of salad. I fill the large container for the her and it weighs slightly over two pounds. I print out the price label.)

    Customer: “Wait a second, you are ripping me off!”

    Me: “I’m sorry?”

    Customer: “How the h*** can it be over 6 dollars? It’s on sale!”

    Me: “Ma’am, the salad is $2.99 a pound on sale. It’s slightly over two pounds, so that’s why it’s more than six dollars. Would you like me to take some salad out?”

    Customer: “Bulls***! It’s only $2.99 a pound. That’s just over two dollars a pound. How can it be that much?”

    Me: “Ma’am, ma’am… please, hear me out. It’s $2.99, right? That’s almost $3. If you add 3 and 3 together…”

    Customer: “Do I look stupid to you? You add $2.99 and $2.99…”

    (Suddenly, there is a look of realization in her eyes. She takes the salad from the counter and briskly turns away without saying another word.)

    Related:
    Some Things Just Don’t Add Up, Part 7
    Some Things Just Don’t Add Up, Part 6
    Some Things Just Don’t Add Up, Part 5
    Some Things Just Don’t Add Up, Part 4
    Some Things Just Don’t Add Up, Part 3
    Some Things Just Don’t Add Up, Part 2
    Some Things Just Don’t Add Up

    Lost In No Translation, Part 4

    | British Columbia, Canada | Extra Stupid, Language & Words, Tourists/Travel

    (I live in a small town where a cruise ship visits in the summer. Mind you, this is BC, Canada, so English is the main language spoken here, rather than French canadians in Quebec. Note that our entire conversation is in English.)

    Customer: “Hi! May I ask you a question?”

    Me: “Sure, no problem!”

    Customer: “Do people speak French here?”

    Me: “Well, some people might, but it’s more of a second language here.”

    Customer: “Oh, really? Well, I think you’re speaking it very well, because I can understand you!”

    Me: *dumbfounded*

    (At this point, the customer’s husband steps in.)

    Customer’s Husband: “She’s not speaking French, honey.”

    Customer: “…Oh.” *walks away*

    Related:
    Lost In No Translation, Part 3
    Lost In No Translation, Part 2
    Lost In No Translation

    Paying Fool Price

    | NY, USA | Extra Stupid, Math & Science, Money

    Me: “…and your total comes to $10.28.”

    Customer: “No, it doesn’t. I bought two shirts.”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am, but today is a buy 1, get 1 free sale on all women’s apparel.”

    Customer: “Is this some sort of scheme? Because I’m not gonna pay unless I pay for both! I ain’t falling for no scheme!”

    Me: “Miss, I can assure you that today is a a buy 1, get 1 free sale.”

    Customer: *throws down a $20 and a $1 and storms out of the store*

    Dumbed Down

    | Portsmouth, UK | Extra Stupid, Technology

    (Note: I am working on the technical support phone line at a large computer reseller.)

    Customer: “Hi, I’ve bought a new computer from you guys and it’s brilliant. Unfortunately, you’ve made a small mistake.”

    Me: “Sorry about that. What seems to be the problem?”

    Customer: “The DVD drive is upside down. It still works, but I have to hold in the discs while I close the drive.”

    Me: *confused* “Okay… well, bring it in and I’ll get it sorted while you wait.”

    (Half an hour later, I’m covering the returns desk while my colleague is on break. The customer I spoke to on the phone comes up with his computer and places it on the returns desk.)

    Customer: “Someone said they’d fix this for me. The DVD drive is upside down.”

    Me: *turns computer up the right way*

    (The customer was so embarrassed he took his computer and ran out out of the store!)

    Page 158/214First...156157158159160...Last