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    Category: Extra Stupid

    This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

    Contraception Misperceptions

    | Oslo, Norway | Extra Stupid, Health & Body

    (I am a pharmacist working at 24-hour pharmacy. This takes place on a late Sunday evening.)

    Female Caller: “Hello, um… I… um… you know the morning after pill?”

    Me: “Yes, certainly. What would you like to know about it?”

    Female Caller: “Is there an anti-morning after pill?”

    Me: “Sorry? An anti-morning after pill?”

    Female Caller: “Yes. You see, this guy, he came around today, and he brought some flowers and everything, so now I’m kind of regretting taking that pill. So is there an anti-morning after pill I could take?”

    Me: “No, I’m sorry, there isn’t such a thing.”

    Female Caller: “Oh, that is a shame. Do you think they will make one?”

    Me: “No, I’m sorry, but I really don’t think they will.”

    Female Caller: “Really? Oh, that is a bummer.” *hangs up*

    Don’t Count Out The Cost Of Education

    | Gainesville, Florida, USA | Extra Stupid, Math & Science

    (I’m the specialist for the children’s books. A customer comes up and asks me to take her to a popular kids’ series, so I do.)

    Customer: “Now, my granddaughter has numbers 1 and 2.”

    Me: “Great. We have the rest of the series if you’d like to pick up a few more.”

    Customer: “But what should I get?” *spreads her hands helplessly* ”She has 1 and 2 already, what should I get next?”

    Me: “You could get 3.”

    (The customer stands there blankly while I point to the book. She doesn’t move or react until I physically pick it up and put it in her hand.)

    Customer: “And then… should I go down to 4?”

    All Set For Higher Standards

    | Southfield, MI, USA | Extra Stupid, School

    (I work at a test proctoring facility. A student has just finished taking his placement exams.)

    Me: “Alright, you placed into University Physics and Calculus 1.”

    Student: “Okay.”

    Me: “Do you have any last questions?”

    Student: “Who do I talk to about registration?”

    Me: “Go upstairs to Admissions. They should be able to help you.”

    Student: “Okay.” *stands there*

    Me: “…Anything else I can help you with?”

    Student: “Nope.” *stands there*

    Me: “Okay… you’re all set.”

    Student: “Okay.” *stands there*

    (I try to subtly signal the student to move on by shuffling my papers.)

    Me: “Is there anything else I can help you with?”

    Student: “Nope.” *stands there*

    Me: “So… your scores have been entered into the database. So… you’re all set.”

    Student: “Oh, I’m all set?”

    Me: “Yes…”

    Student: “Oh, okay!” *leaves*

    Aisle Always Need Directions, Part 4

    | Australia | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    (I’m stacking shelves next to the chip display when this happens. Note: The display is very large thus hard to miss.)

    Customer: “Hi, I was wondering if you could help me?”

    Me: “Of course. What can I do for you, ma’am?”

    Customer: “I was wondering what aisle the chips are in?”

    (I’m a little stunned, as she is standing right next to them.)

    Me: “Um, just right there.” *points to chips*

    Customer: “No! I asked what AISLE they were in.”

    Me: “Um, ma’am you’re standing right—”

    Customer: “FOR F***’S SAKE! CAN YOU PLEASE JUST TELL ME WHAT AISLE THE CHIPS ARE IN?”

    Me: “A-Aisle 7.”

    Customer: “Thank you! Now was it really that hard?”

    (The customer arrives back at the display a few minutes later.)

    Customer: *grabs chips* “You could have f***ing told me I was standing right f***ing next to them! HONESTLY! What is this world coming to?!”

    Me: *speechless*

    Related:
    Aisle Always Need Directions, Part 3
    Aisle Always Need Directions, Part 2
    Aisle Always Need Directions

    They’ll Always Be (Baby) Back For More

    | Glendale Heights, IL, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    (A customer has just given me her order for a full-slab of ribs. She seems nice and even-tempered until this moment.)

    Customer: “That’s to go, and I want to talk to your manager!”

    (I call over the manager.)

    Manager: “Yes, how may I help you?”

    Customer: “Last time I came here, I ordered your ribs and they were absolutely DISGUSTING! There was barely ANY sauce and they were cold and gross!”

    Manager: “Did you contact us? We could have given you customer credit.”

    Customer: “NO! Why would I EVER want to come back?!” *pays for her ribs and storms off*

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