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    Category: Extra Stupid

    This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

    Something Is Off About The Situation

    | NY, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

    Customer: “Can you help me with this game? It’s not working!”

    Me: “Sure no problem. Glad to help!”

    Customer: “I put my money in and am pushing start, and it’s not working.”

    Me: “It’s not working because it’s off. The game is off, ma’am.”

    Customer: “What do you mean off?”

    Me: “It’s off, as in the opposite of on. That’s why the screen is all black.”

    Customer: “Oh. I thought it was some black screen game.”

    A Pricing One-Eighty On His 360

    | OH, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Money

    (I am ringing up a customer purchasing a mildly anticipated videogame.)

    Me: “Before I start ringing these up, would you happen to have your [store name] rewards card with you?”

    Customer: “No, I don’t even have one! Those are just a way for you to get more money out of me!”

    Me: “Actually, we offer the basic version for free. If you would like to sign up now all you have to do is—”

    Customer: “I said no, godd*** it!”

    Me: “Alright, sir. No problem. I’ll just ring these up then.”

    (The customer is buying a used Xbox 360, and five or so games. It takes me a few minutes to grab the Xbox and games from the back, as the ones on display are empty to prevent theft.)

    Me: “Okay, would you like to put $10 down on a pre-order for any games?”

    Customer: “No! Just hurry it up!”

    Me: “Alright your total is $210.67.”

    Customer: “I told you earlier I only wanted to spend $200 on this.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir. You will have to put one of these games back or trade one for a cheaper one. The used versions are always cheaper and work just as well as the new ones.”

    Customer: “No, you don’t understand! I want to spend $200 on this stuff.”

    (This goes on for a few minute, until he finally decides to exchange one of the games for a cheaper one.)

    Me: “Alright your total is $183.43.”

    Customer: “Are you stupid?! I only want to spend $200!”

    Me: *gives up* “Okay, your total is now $200 dollars.”

    Customer: “Finally!”

    (He hands me the money, grabs his items, and leaves without his receipt. I felt it would be wrong to keep the money, so I gave about half off the price for the next nice customer.)

    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 16

    | ON, Canada | Extra Stupid, Math & Science, Money

    Customer: “Excuse me, miss? I’d like a $20 iTunes card, but there are none here.”

    Me: “Oh, yes. Unfortunately we haven’t received that shipment yet. But we do have the $10 cards.”

    Customer: *frustrated* “But I want a $20 card.”

    Me: “Well, ma’am, you could always buy two $10 cards instead.”

    Customer: *yelling* “That doesn’t equal 20 dollars!” *storms out of the store*

    Related:
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 15
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 14
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 13
    This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 12

    You’re Hot And Your Cold You’re Yes And You’re No, Part 2

    | Okemos, MI, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    (My coworker is taking drive-thru orders, and I’m filling them.)

    Coworker: “Thank you for choosing [cafe]. How can I help you today?”

    Customer: “I’d like a large iced mocha latte, please.”

    Coworker: “Your total is [total]. Please pull forward.”

    (The customer is given the drink, but sends it back through the window.)

    Customer: “This isn’t what I wanted. I wanted the hot mocha latte.”

    Coworker: “Well, you did say the iced mocha latte. We’ll fix it for you though.”

    Customer: “Oh. So when you say iced, it doesn’t mean the hot one?”

    Related:
    You’re Hot And Your Cold You’re Yes And You’re No

    The Situation Is Escalating

    | Salt Lake City, UT, USA | Bizarre, Extra Stupid

    (Our down escalator is stopped for repairs, but customers are free to walk down it. There is also a clearly marked elevator near me as well as a staircase.)

    Customer: “Excuse me, miss, do you work here?”

    Me: “Yes. How can I help you?”

    Customer: “Your escalator has stopped.”

    Me: “I am sorry about that. It should be fixed soon.”

    Customer: “So, am I stuck up here?”

    Me: “…Sorry?”

    Customer: “Do I have to wait here until it is fixed?”

    Me: “Of course not. You can go anytime. We won’t hold you hostage.”

    Customer: “But the escalator is broken.”

    Me: “Yes, and we are sorry for the inconvenience.”

    Customer: “How do I get down stairs?”

    (At this point, we can both clearly see other customers walking down the broken escalator.)

    Me: “Well, you are allowed to walk down the escalator, but if you feel uncomfortable with that, you can take the elevator or stairs behind me.”

    Customer: “Well, when do you think it will be fixed?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, I really don’t know. They don’t tell us that much about what is happening in the store.”

    Customer: “I want to see a manager!”

    Me: “Let me call one down for you.”

    Customer: “What is your name?!”

    (My coworkers have come to watch, and are trying not to laugh. Other customers have begun to laugh.)

    Me: “My name is [name].”

    (I call the manager, she comes down, and tells the customer the same thing I said.)

    Customer: “Well, this place is trash!”

    (Believe it or not, she found a chair and sat there for an hour until the escalator was fixed!)

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