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    Category: Extra Stupid

    This site is full of Customers; their stupid and moronic exploits that make us laugh. But these gems contained within are for those special cases, the extra stupid, the ones that make you wonder how they have survived this long!

    Quite A Climb To Get To The Answer

    | Boston, MA, USA | Extra Stupid, Theme Of The Month

    (I work at a climbing gym. We were closed for a week to do yearly renovations.)

    Customer: *walks up, pulls on locked door*

    Customer: *looks inside, sees climbing walls being painted*

    Customer: *looks at sign on door, which explains reason for closure*

    Customer: *looks inside again*

    Customer: *pulls out cell phone, calls our landline*

    Customer: “Hey, are you guys open?”

    Staring At The Sign For Hours

    | VIC, Australia | Extra Stupid, Theme Of The Month

    (I had recently moved my store to a new location and had not yet advertised the new phone number, when a customer calls with a question.)

    Caller: “Hi, I just wanted to know what times you’re open.”

    Me: “Certainly.”

    (As I tell him which days I’m open and the hours, naturally, I’m curious as to how he got my phone number and ask him about this.)

    Caller: “Oh, I was looking through the window and wrote down the number from the sign on the front door.”

    Me: “You mean at the bottom of the sign listing my business hours?”

    I Am Just A Number

    | Bergen, Norway | Extra Stupid, Family & Kids

    (I am out shopping with my 10-year-old sister. I am 23. Another customer, a woman in her 60s, approaches my sister as she is standing by herself for a moment.)

    Customer: “Are you the manager here?”

    Sister: “No…”

    Customer: “What are you, then?”

    Sister: “I’m 10…”

    Upgrade Degrade

    | USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

    (I work at a web hosting company where we have several levels of packages. Customer is currently on a server with hundreds of others and is trying to set up an account with a username that is already taken.)

    Customer: “I can’t use this username; it says it’s already in use.”

    Me: “Let me take a look and see what’s going on.”

    (I check. Sure enough, someone else on the server is using the username already.)

    Me: “I do apologize, but there is someone on the server already using that username. You will have to use another.”

    Customer: “I guess I’ll just have to upgrade to a dedicated server.”

    (A dedicated is a server with no other users, but is also 10 times the price.)

    Me: “You don’t have to upgrade. Simply use another username. You can always just add a 1 to the end of it, that will work.”

    Customer: “No, thanks. I knew I’d have to upgrade eventually.”

    Me: “No problem. Was there anything else I could do for you today?”

    Customer: “Let me talk to your manager. I can’t believe you’re making me upgrade! This is ridiculous!”

    Giving You No Middle-Ground

    | WI, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    Customer: “Hi, I’d like that ham, please.”

    (The customer makes a vague gesture toward several trays of ham.)

    Me: *pointing to the ham closest to her hand wave* “This one?”

    Customer: “No.”

    Me: *pointing to another ham* “Was it this one?”

    Customer: “No.”

    Me: “Can you tell me what ham it says on the tag, ma’am?”

    Customer: *very rudely* “It’s the one in the middle!”

    (I look at the six trays of ham. There is no middle. This exchange goes repeats until I eventually point to the ham she wants.)

    Customer: “You should probably be more attentive, miss. I need some cheese now.”

    Me: “Of course. What kind would you like?”

    (The customer waves her hand toward the case containing over twenty kinds of cheeses.)

    Customer: “Give me two packages of that.”


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