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    Category: Canada

    Canada is a great nation, but it gets visited by its fair share of idiots, and sometimes produces them as well! If you want to know how stupid customers overcome the metric system, or those funny Canadian coins, then read on!

    Big Lies Are Better Than Small Ones, Part 2

    | BC, Canada | Canada, Tourists/Travel

    (A tourist and his friend come into my gas station.)

    Tourist: “Where’s all the snow and igloos?”

    (I think he’s just joking, so I play along.)

    Me: “Oh, we put them away during the tourist season to make Americans feel more at home.”

    Tourist: “That sounds like a lot of work.”

    Me: “Keeps us strong for lumberjacking, eh. All part of that Canadian hospitality.”

    Tourist: “Makes sense. Thanks bro.” *leaves*

    Tourist’s Friend: “He thinks you’re serious.”

    Me: *facepalm*

    Related:
    Big Lies Are Better Than Small Ones

    Canada, America’s Hat, Part 6

    | Michigan, USA | Canada, Geography

    (Our company is part of a global organization that holds weekend teaching conferences across North America.)

    Caller: “Do you ever have programs in Canada, or just in the States?”

    Me: “Our territory covers North America. We have programs in the US, Canada, and Bermuda.”

    Caller: “Canada isn’t part of North America.”

    Me: “Yes it is. Canada is part of North America.”

    Caller: “Typical American attitude! Canada is its OWN country!”

    O, Canaduh

    | UK | Canada, Tourists/Travel

    (A customer walks up to the counter.)

    Me: “Hi sir! What can I get—“

    Customer: “Hi! I’m Canadian! Do you have a normal coffee?”

    Me: *confused* “Erm, yes, sir, we have filter coffee that you can add milk to, if you’d like?”

    Customer: “That’ll do. Thanks!”

    (We finish the transaction and I’m still confused as to his interesting but random piece of information. I watch him as he goes towards the station where the milk is kept. There is another customer there putting milk in her coffee. When she finishes, he reaches across to get the milk.)

    Customer: “Hi! I’m Canadian!”

    Meanwhile In Oklahoma

    | Montreal, QC, Canada | Canada

    (I ring up a customer, who pays with debit. Shortly after I give him the debit machine to go through the prompts.)

    Customer: “Oh, it seems to have cancelled the transaction.”

    Me: “No problem. We’ll just start over.”

    (I swipe his card again and hand him the machine.)

    Customer: “See, here’s where I went wrong.”

    (He shows me the screen. It says ‘Purchase: 8.50$ OK?’ Underneath, the left button is indicated as ‘OK’, and the right as ‘CAN’ for ‘cancel’.)

    Me: “So, did you press OK to approve the transaction?”

    Customer: “I thought CAN meant Canada!”

    Canada: America’s Hat, Part 4

    | Winnipeg, MB, Canada | Canada

    (I am an American citizen living and working as a legal Canadian resident.)

    Customer: “It’s too bad that you can’t leave to vote, or do they let you do that here?”

    Me: “I can’t vote. I’m not a citizen.”

    (The customer’s jaw drops.)

    Customer: “Wow! Where are you from?”

    Me: “The US.”

    Customer: “Well, I never would have guessed. You look just like one of us!”

    (He gestures to himself and his shopping companion.)

    Me: “Uh, thanks?”

    Related:
    Canada: America’s Hat, Part 3
    Canada: America’s Hat, Part 2
    Canada: America’s Hat

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