Featured Story:
  • Bigotry Is Not On The Menu
    (1,913 thumbs up)
  • Category: Bizarre

    For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

    Enough To Get The Blood Pumping

    | QLD, Australia | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Health & Body

    (I’m working on the checkouts when a customer around her 30s approaches with a large trolley.)

    Me: “Hi, how are you?”

    Customer: “Fine.”

    (She starts loading her groceries onto the register and I start scanning. She then reaches into her bag to take something out. Not paying much attention, I continue scanning. The register belt moves closer to me and soon I see that she has placed a used sanitary pad on the register.)

    Me: “Uh… ma’am? Is that from you?”

    Customer: “Yes, why?”

    Me: “Would you mind removing it from my register?”

    Customer: “Why? Are you too lazy to throw it out yourself?”

    Me: “Ma’am, that is a serious health hazard. Besides that, it isn’t in my job description to clean up after customers. I’m not touching that; please get it off my register.”

    Customer: “I can’t believe how lazy you are!”

    (The customer grabs the pad, storms over to the bin and throws it away before coming back to pay for her groceries. She leaves without a word. I close down my register, and wash my hands a dozen times.)

    Doing A Disservice To Service With A Smile

    | UK | Bizarre, Liars & Scammers

    (I work in a call center that directs calls to local benefits offices. It’s a dull job, but I try to keep positive when I greet people on the phone.)

    Me: “Good morning, [Job Center] national switchboard, [Name] speaking; how can I help?”

    Caller: “You sound very happy.”

    Me: “Well, yes, it’s a nice day today! How can I help?”

    Caller: “No one at [Job Center] is happy. You can’t be at [Job Center]! You must be a scam!”

    (The caller hangs up.)

    Me: “…what just happened?”

    The Answer Came From The Gut

    | FL, USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink, Health & Body

    Me: “Was everything all right? Did everyone enjoy their meals?”

    Customer: “The food was excellent. My digestive system is dutifully converting it into feces even as we speak!”

    Me: “That’s… super.”

    Common Sense Abhors A Vacuum

    | Vancouver, BC, Canada | Bizarre, Language & Words

    Customer: *whispering* “Faaaaaaahkew…”

    (I am slightly ticked off by this. I didn’t say or do anything to the customer for him to say ‘F*** you’ unprovoked.)

    Me: “What!? Say that again?!”

    Customer: *whispering* “Vhaaaaaaaaaakeeew…”

    Me: “Wait, are you asking where the vacuum cleaners are?”

    Customer: *nods*

    Me: “Right this way.”

    (Sometimes, you have to be patient with customers.)

    One Ring To Scare Them All

    | St. Louis, MO, USA | Bizarre

    (I am working in a gift shop full of customers, mostly teenagers on field trips and their chaperones. I notice four boys as they walk in, and I greet them. They do not respond. A few minutes later, I begin adjusting some misplaced personalized rings.)

    Boy #1: *pointing to a ring I am adjusting* “AAAHHH!”

    Me: “Yes?”

    Boy #1: *points again* “AAAAHHHH!”

    Boy #2: “AAAAAAHHHH!”

    Me: “Alright, how may I help you? Is there something I can get for you?”

    All Four Boys: “AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!”

    Me: “Uh, okay…I can call somebody to help you.”

    (The four boys stare at me, then slink away towards the door, almost without a word.)

    Boy #3: “AAAAAHHH!” *all four exit*

    (Several minutes later, all of the customers have left my shop and I begin adjusting the rings and key-chains again. I hear a voice behind me.)

    Boy #4: “Uh, excuse me?”

    Me: *turning around* “Yes?”

    Boy #4: “Yes, I was wondering if you could tell me if—AAAAAHHH!” *bolts from the store*

    Page 92/168First...9091929394...Last