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    Category: Bizarre

    For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

    Rabbiting On

    | UK | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Pets & Animals, Wild & Unruly

    (I’m working at my till when an old lady in a wheelchair approaches me. Our rabbit hutches are situated right next to our office that keeps the safe inside.)

    Customer: “Hello, dear. I was wondering if you could give me some advice about your rabbit hutches.”

    Me: “Of course. Is it just for one rabbit or two?”

    Customer: “Oh, it would be two.”

    (I take her over to the hutches and show her around explaining the features of each one.)

    Customer: “I don’t have much room in my husband’s car and I really need one for today. Do you sell them un-built?”

    Me: “I can grab a flat packed one from out the back if you’d like?”

    Customer: “Could you bring one out to show me so I can see if it will fit?”

    (I run out to our storage area and grab a flat-packed version of the hutch she had asked for. When I bring it out her attitude has completely changed.)

    Me: “Here you go. This is the one. It’s really simple to build and will only take ten minutes.”

    Customer: “FOR GOD’S SAKE. HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE TO GRAB ONE GODD*** ITEM FOR ME?! DON’T BOTHER WITH IT. I’LL JUST GO SOMEWHERE ELSE WHERE THEY DON’T TREAT THEIR CUSTOMERS LIKE S***!”

    (I stand there in stunned silence as the customer quickly leaves the store, cursing frequently under her breath. Later on my manager, who ran home from work, couldn’t find his trainers which he leaves in the office. We decide to look on the CCTV to check if anyone has moved them. The video shows me walking off to get the hutch for the customer. When I leave she proceeds to get out of her wheelchair, enter the office (which has a combination lock on it), and try to open the safe. After failing to open it she grabs my manager’s trainers, shoves them in her handbag, and returns to the wheelchair.)

    Manager: “Who the h*** was she?”

    Me: “I think I almost sold the Devil a rabbit hutch today…”

    A Bush In The Fridge Is Worth Two In The Bush

    | Oslo, Norway | Bizarre, Home Improvement, Politics

    (I work in the customer service desk at a large store selling domestic appliances. This day one of my ‘regulars’ came in. He’s a really old man – and he seldom files complaints, he just wants to know how his stuff is working, and maybe have a chat.)

    Me: “Hello. How may I help you today?”

    Customer: *whispering* “There was something wrong with delivery of my fridge. It came with something in it.”

    (I pull up his records, and see that he bought one of our display models earlier that week. It’s not seldom other customers leave soda bottles or other stuff in the fridges that’s out on the floor, and I immediately think that is the case.)

    Me: “Well, I’m really sorry, sir. But may I ask, exactly what was inside the fridge?”

    Customer: *still whispering* “George W. Bush.”

    Me: “Excuse me? What?”

    Customer: “The American ex-president. The younger one! He was in my fridge and now he’s on my living room floor, all tied up and ready to be shipped back.”

    Me: “Shipped back?”

    Customer: “Oh, don’t worry; I’m not going to have YOU do that, poor thing. I’ve called FedEx. I just wanted to let you know. ”

    Me: *not really knowing what I can do, other than play along* “Well, thank you then, sir. And sorry for your trouble. Is the fridge working okay, though?”

    Customer: “Oh yeah, it’s totally fine! But you should really stop selling appliances with republicans in them. Could hurt your business.”

    Fresh Coffee With An Extra Shot Of Crazy

    , | CT, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Food & Drink, Health & Body

    Me: “Hi, I’m [Name]. I’d be happy to take your order!”

    Customer: *on a cell phone* “…I know! I can’t believe it! I told him I just want that d*** whore out of my house!” *continues conversation*

    Me: “Ma’am? May I help you?”

    Customer: “Is your coffee fresh?”

    Me: “Not at the moment, but I’d be happy to start you a fresh pot!”

    Customer: “WHAT? I’m on OXYGEN! I don’t want to DIE!”

    Me: *confused* “Ma’am? It wouldn’t affect—”

    (The customer drives around to the window.)

    Me: “So you did want the coffee, then?”

    Customer: “Sorry about that! You didn’t hear any of that conversation did you?”

    Me: “Well, yes, ma’am. Every employee with a headset can hear everything said at the speaker.”

    Customer: *pays for her coffee* “OH! I’m so sorry, honey; I just want that d*** whore out of my house!”

    (The customer got her coffee and drove away. The rest of us were left scratching our heads as witnesses to the level of crazy that just left.)

    That Last Customer Was An Odd Fish

    | Tampa, FL, USA | Bizarre, Pets & Animals, Spouses & Partners, Wild & Unruly

    (I get home from work and my fiancé has just finished up his shift, too.)

    Me: “Hi! How was your day?”

    Fiancé: “Well, the last customer that I spoke with today told me that if I didn’t tell him exactly what he wanted to hear that he would find out where I lived, fly to me, find a fish, and gently slap me with it.”

    Me: “Well, we live in Florida, so at least you’d know the fish was fresh!”

    Enough Barking Crazy For One Day

    | Savannah, GA, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Pets & Animals

    (I’m a supervisor working a closing shift, helping out for another department, since we’re short on people that night, and doing my work at the service desk. My coworker, who is manning the service desk that night, is on the phone with someone, looking slightly perplexed.)

    Coworker: *mouths toward me* “Take this! Please!”

    (She passes the phone over to me.)

    Me: “Thank you for calling your local [Store Name]. How may I help you?”

    Customer: *in a very forced high pitched voice* “Do you have any doghouses.”

    (It’s pretty difficult to understand, as they’re clearly disguising their voice to sound like a woman.)

    Me: “I’m sorry. Did you say doghouses?”

    Customer: “Yes, doghouses.”

    Me: “Oh, no, I’m sorry. We don’t carry doghouses. We do have dog cages and dog carriers, though.”

    Customer: “Do you think a little boy could fit in them?”

    Me: *hangs up* “Nope. Not tonight. I do not have the patience. They asked if a little boy could fit in them. F*** that!”

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