Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Got Him Out Of A Pickle
    (3,180 thumbs up)
  • October Theme Of The Month: Coupon Complications!
    Submit your story today!

    Category: Bizarre

    For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

    How To Keep Your Days From Drag(ging)-On

    | FL, USA | Bizarre, Money

    (I’m working at my teller window when a client with a bandaged hand comes up with a deposit.)

    Me: “Hello! Welcome to [bank]. I see that you hurt your hand; were you fighting with a dragon?”

    Client: “Yes, and it won.”

    Me: “Was it a big dragon?”

    Client: “No, it was a little one. But he didn’t play fair. He used fire!”

    Me: “Oh, no! Well, better luck to you next time. Here’s your receipt. Have a wonderful day!”

    Client: “You too! Thanks!” *walks out the door*

    (My boss, who has been standing behind me the whole time, finally speaks up.)

    Boss: “That was not normal…”

    Sounds Like Hell’s Kitchen

    | New York, NY, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests

    (I receive a call from an irate customer demanding a manager. I page one over.)

    Manager: “Yes, ma’am… Dear me! I am truly sorry to hear that ma’am. When did this take place?… And do you remember who it was who helped you?… Well, do you remember anything about them physically?”

    (He pulls out his notepad, and jots down the following: BLONDE, MALE, OVER SIX FEET TALL, PALE SKIN, GREEN EYES, MOLE ON CHEEK, DIRTY SUIT. By the end, he’s looking at the list in disbelief.)

    Manager: “Um… ma’am, are you sure this happened at [kitchen store]?… No of course not! But you see, there’s no one working here who fits the description you’ve given me… Well for starters, we don’t have any blonde males working here… Okay, well did they have black or brown hair then?… Well, again ma’am, do you remember anything definite?… Ma’am, I’m sorry for the trauma you suffered, but there are currently 30 employees working here… I need something more than… What?… No, ma’am, I will not brutally interrogate each and every one of them to find out if maybe one of them helped you pick out a knife! If you can remember anything definite about who it was you encountered here, I will do all I can to help… excuse me?… Ma’am, if you don’t stop with the racial slurs, I’m going to terminate this call… Very well, then this is officially a legal matter and I can no longer talk to you. Have a nice day!”

    (He hangs up, and takes an enormous breath.)

    Manager: “Okay, well this is going to make for an interesting week.”

    (He takes his notes, and heads into his office.)

    Fine Art Comes With Age

    | San Antonio, TX, USA | Bizarre, Family & Kids

    (I’m a caricaturist working at a party. I’m 19, but because of my petite figure, I’m often mistaken for younger. I’m facing my stand, waiting for a guest.)

    Guest: “Are you doing caricatures?”

    (I turn to face the guest. She is a 10-year-old girl, who suddenly looks horrified and jumps back.)

    Guest: “Woah! HOW OLD ARE YOU?”

    Me: “Um, 19?”

    Guest: “Geez! You look like you’re 14, or something; you scared me!”

    Me: “I’m sorry?”

    Guest: “I’m used to people doing these to be like 30, or something. I was expecting an old lady.”

    Me: “Haha, sorry I’m so young?”

    Guest: “YOU SCARED ME! YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE OLD!”

    He Is Not A-Mew-sed

    | USA | Bizarre, Pets & Animals

    (We have only been open for 20 minutes, when I get a call to the front to show a cat to a customer.)

    Customer: “Hello, can I hold this kitty?”

    Me: “Sure!”

    (I take out the cat from her cage; she’s a really friendly grey tabby.)

    Customer: “Oh, thank you so much! I can talk to cats, you know! He was meowing at me; he said that I should take him home.”

    (The customer looks the cat directly in her eyes.)

    Customer: “Meow!”

    Me: “Haha, that’s cool. Actually, that cat is female. She’s got all her shots and stuff, so if you want her, you just need to go fill out her paperwork.”

    Customer: “EXCUSE ME?”

    (The customer then growls at me like an animal.)

    Customer: “HE. IS. A. MAN. CAT!

    (He puts her back into her cage, and goes off to fill out paperwork on her.)

    Coworker: “It’s gonna be a looooong day.”

    More Beer, Less Fear

    | AZ, USA | Bizarre, Criminal/Illegal

    (I walk over to the convenience store to get a drink. As I’m going inside, I see two police officers with a man in handcuffs in front of the building. I start a conversation with the employees.)

    Me: “Looks like you guys had an interesting morning.”

    Employee #1: “I can’t believe it; he just sat out there waiting for the cops after he stole the beer.”

    Me: “Huh?”

    (One of the officers comes in.)

    Officer: “So, what happened here?”

    Employee #2: “He got the 12-pack from the cooler and stood in line, but then he just walked out without paying. I called for him to stop, but he just said ‘I’ll wait out here for the cops’.”

    Officer: “He didn’t try to run?”

    Employee #2: “No, he just opened the case and started drinking a can of beer right outside the store!”

    Page 81/142First...7980818283...Last