Featured Story:
  • Always Time For A Rhyme
    (2,241 thumbs up)
  • Category: Bizarre

    For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

    Banking On The Go(ing)

    | Fairbanks, AK, USA | Bizarre, Health & Body

    (While shopping I need to use the restroom, after going in I hear the following conversation:)

    Other Occupant: “Yeah, I’d like to know why my bank charged me this amount. Huh? Hold on sweetie. I can’t hear you.” *puts phone on speaker* “What was that?”

    Poor Customer Service Agent: “I need your account number ,ma’am, before I can look up anything.”

    Other Occupant: “Oh, sure, it’s [number].”

    Poor Customer Service Agent: “Okay, that charge was an excess transfer fee.”

    Other Occupant: “Hold on.”

    (The other occupant flushes the toilet.)

    Other Occupant: *walking past* “So what is an excess transfer fee?”

    Poor Customer Service Agent: “Um…”

    (The worst part? She didn’t wash her hands as she left.)

    Wish You Were Just Pulling My Leg

    | Taylor, MI, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Food & Drink

    (I was working as a cashier when a customer comes up with a cart full of two-packs of turkey legs.)

    Me: “Wow, these are pretty big; they make me think of renaissance festival turkey legs.”

    Customer: “Yeah, exactly! I’m going to put them in my smoker. They come out just like that.”

    Me: “Oh, sounds nice! Now I’m craving one!” *laughs*

    Customer: “You are? I could give you one if you like!”

    (I laugh it off as a joke and finish the transaction normally. However, a couple of days later, I see the customer return with a food container in the child seat of her cart.)

    Customer: “Oh! I was hoping you were working this shift again. Guess what I brought you!”

    (She opens the container and pulls out a whole turkey leg, smoked so much it’s falling off the bone she’s holding it by.)

    Customer: “I brought you one like I said!”

    Me: *surprised* “I… uh? Thank you, but… I really can’t take it!”

    Customer: “No, it’s okay. I have plenty. You saw. You said you wanted one right? Take it!”

    (I continue to politely refuse while she literally shoved the turkey leg at me, it’s falling apart on my belt and getting grease everywhere.)

    Me: *desperate* “I can’t eat on the job. I could get in trouble!”

    Customer: “Oh, well… I’ll just leave you it here for it later then.”

    (She puts the turkey leg right on the belt and hurries off like nothing happened, leaving me to clean up the greasy mess. It was a nice gesture but an odd one at that!)

    Actions Are Totally Out Of Order

    | Wichita, KS, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Health & Body

    (It is near the end of my shift and I am cleaning the bathrooms in my section. The only event currently going on is being held at the other end of the building; there are two other sets of bathrooms and several closed doors between the event and my area. Nonetheless, out of habit, I have put up the “CLOSED FOR CLEANING” sign in the doorway of the women’s bathroom. It’s a bright yellow sign, on a bright yellow safety bar, that is at chest level so that people can’t just walk underneath it. I have just finished cleaning the mirrors and sinks. As I turn away from the mirrors, a woman walks in.)

    Me: “Oh, I’m sorry, but this bathroom is closed.”

    Woman: “What? Why?”

    Me: “Because I’m cleaning it.”

    Woman: “Well, you should have a sign up!”

    Me: “Uh, I do. Right across the doorway”

    Woman: “Well, that doesn’t apply to me! I have to go!”

    Me: “Are you with the group on the other side of the church?”

    Woman: “YES! Now let me use the bathroom!”

    Me: “Ma’am, you would have had to pass by two other bathrooms on the way down here. Those were much closer to your event.”

    Woman: “I wanted to use this one!”

    (My bathrooms aren’t that special; they’re the oldest bathrooms in the building. The ones by her event are much nicer and had been renovated only a year ago. One toilet in my bathroom is also out of order, while we wait for a back-ordered part to come in.)

    Me: “All right, fine.”

    (She tries to go into the stall with the big ‘OUT OF ORDER’ sign. The stall is locked AND taped shut, since people had been ignoring the sign most of the week and unlocking the stall. Thus far, the tape had deterred them.)

    Woman: “Why can’t I get in here?! I want in! I have to go!”

    Me: “Ma’am, that stall is out of order. The toilet doesn’t work. That’s why there’s a sign and the door is taped shut. There are seven other stalls that are just fine.”

    Woman: *huffing* “FINE!”

    (I go out to my cart to take inventory of what I need to restock before I leave, while I wait for her to finish. A few minutes later, she comes barreling out, knocking my sign out of the doorway.)

    Woman: “Your toilet is broken!” *storms off down the hall*

    (I rolled my eyes, put the sign back, and went to clean whichever toilet she used, figuring she had probably gotten the one with the finicky flusher. She hadn’t. What she had done was unlock the out of order stall and ripped the tape down… and then ripped down the out of order sign, tossed it in the toilet, and urinated and defecated on it. I had to call my shift supervisor down to turn the water back on to that toilet so I could clean it, which left me with a flooded floor from the huge leak that had necessitated closing that toilet in the first place.)

    The Power Of The Lanyard

    | Portland, OR, USA | Bizarre, Theme Of The Month

    (I am shopping at a popular punk/pop culture outfitter for some new shirts. I have recently moved onto a nearby college dorm and am wearing a lanyard with my keycard and keys on it that clearly have my school logo on them. I am also wearing a t-shirt referencing a popular rock band and an animated series and have a purple streak dyed in my hair. As I’m stepping out of the dressing room with several shirts, I am approached by two fellow customers.)

    Customer #1: “Hi, is it okay if I try these clothes on after I buy them?”

    Me: “…what?” *thinking she may be asking the employee nearby*

    Customer #1: *looking me in the eye* “Yes, I want to try them on AFTER I purchase them.”

    Me: *deer in headlights* “Uh… I guess there’s no harm in that.”

    Customer #1: “Excellent, thank you!” *goes to pay*

    (Immediately behind her, Customer #2 approaches me, having heard the entirety of our conversation.)

    Customer #2: “Do you have dressing rooms?”

    Me: “Yes…?” *points to the room I just exited*

    (He leaves, and I turn to my friend.)

    Me: “They both thought I worked here!”

    Friend: *laughing* “Maybe you should apply here!”

    (Considering the stupidity of those two customers, maybe I should NOT.)

    Even The Batcave Has A Woman’s Restroom

    | Gainesville, FL, USA | Bizarre, Theme Of The Month

    (I’m the customer in this story. I am with my girlfriend and her sister checking out one of the many Halloween stores that just opened up. I have purple and blue hair, a snapback on, facial piercings, and my arm was around my girlfriend’s shoulders. An older woman approaches me.)

    Woman: *says something I don’t catch*

    Me: “I’m sorry?”

    Woman: “Women’s restroom?”

    Me: “Uh, I don’t know. I don’t work here.”

    Woman: *walks off*

    (I didn’t realize until she left that she must have thought that the fact that I was wearing a lanyard meant I was working. It was a Batman lanyard with my girlfriend’s car keys on it.)

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