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    Category: Bizarre

    For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

    Requires Adult Supervision

    | Philadelphia, PA, USA | Bizarre, Theme Of The Month

    (I work in a daycare which caters to infants through to 12 years of age. A middle-aged man once approaches me.)

    Customer: “Hi.”

    Me: “Hello. How can I help you?”

    Customer: “I want to be cared for.”

    Me: “How old are you?”

    Customer: “46.”

    Me: “This is a daycare that only caters to young children.”

    Customer: “Oh… do you know where I can find a daycare that caters to adults?”

    Me: “Yes I do. The nearest hospital is right down the road.”

    Customer: “Thanks! I can’t wait to play with the toys!”

    Raisin Awareness Of Her Problem

    | MI, USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink, Health & Body, Theme Of The Month

    (I give out free samples. I am serving a variety of grapes when I see a well-dressed woman in her 60s nearby with her daughter and grandchild. Listening to them talk, she seems very educated and well-spoken, and I see her approach my cart.)

    Me: “Hello, would you like to try some of our grapes today?”

    Customer: “Oh, no thank you, dear.”

    (I wish her a good day, and go back to preparing more samples. I realize a few seconds later that she is still just standing there, staring at me.)

    Me: “Is there anything I can help you with, ma’am?”

    (Suddenly she gives me a death glare, jabs her finger toward my bowl of grapes and yells at me.)

    Customer: “DEY GIVE ME DA POOPIES!”

    (She then stomps off in a huff, leaving me to wonder what the heck just happened.)

    November Themed Story Giveaway Reminder: Bizarre Behavior

    | Not Always Right | Announcements, Bizarre, Theme Of The Month
    Want to win a Not Always Right t-shirt?
    Enter Not Always Right’s November Themed Story Giveaway:
    Bizarre Behavior!

    Entering is as easy as 1-2-3:

    1. Submit a funny or interesting story about customers behaving bizarrely.
    2. Enter your email address in the form to qualify.
    3. All posted stories will be entered in a drawing to win a free t-shirt gift certificate, to use in the official Not Always Right shop!

    PS: winners will be announced the first Wednesday of every month. Next free t-shirt gift certificate: Wednesday, December 4!

    The Bill Of Wrongs

    | VA, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Hotels & Lodging, Theme Of The Month

    Me: “Hello, may I help you?”

    Customer: “Yes, this receipt.”

    Me: “Was there something wrong with the charges?”

    Customer: “No, they’re fine, I just don’t… like it.”

    Me: “What don’t you like about it?”

    Customer: “Well, for instance, the total should be on the top, not the bottom. And my name should be on the bottom, not the top. See? And the font should be prettier.”

    Me: “So what you’re saying is you don’t like the format of our receipt?”

    Customer: “Exactly!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but to change the format of our receipt would mean that we have change our computer’s automatic program.”

    Customer: “Well DO it then!”

    Me: “That would take hours.”

    Customer: “Well I don’t HAVE hours! I have a plane to catch!”

    Me: “I’ll get the manager.”

    (I get the manager and he explains exactly what I said to the woman, who gets more and more irritated by the second.)

    Customer: “Fine! I thought you gave good service here; I guess I was wrong! Hmph!”

    (The customer takes her bill and storms off in a huff. Later, we get a survey back taken from her, giving us poor reviews on our service. I have gotten a lot of crazy requests before, but never that!)

    It Is Paranoia If There Is No One After You

    | AB, Canada | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Theme Of The Month

    (I work as a cashier in a bed, bath and furniture place. We are required to ask customers for emails and postal codes before they pay. I usually skip the email bit for older customers because they usually won’t have an email, but still ask for postal codes. My next customer is an older man.)

    Me: “Hi, is this everything for you today?”

    (The customer just gives me a blank stare.)

    Me: “That’ll be [price]; can I get your postal code?”

    Customer: “MY POSTAL CODE?! WHY DO YOU NEED MY POSTAL CODE?!”

    Me: “Well—”

    Customer: “I’M SICK OF THE GOVERNMENT SPYING ON ME ALL THE TIME! THE LAST THING I NEED IS STORES AND PEOPLE LIKE YOU SPYING ON ME!”

    Me: “…alrighty then.”

    (I proceed to hit the skip button and finish his transaction.)

    Customer: “I must come off as a paranoid freak, but I assure you I’m not!”

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