Featured Story:
  • Always Time For A Rhyme
    (2,126 thumbs up)
  • Category: Bizarre

    For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

    Wouldn’t Want To Be In Their Shoes

    | Stockholm, Sweden | Bizarre, Family & Kids

    (I work for the post office at their retail support. We take calls from our retail stores. Outside of every store there are postboxes. They are locked with a special key that only post office employees have. It’s a Saturday afternoon.)

    Me: “Welcome to retail support. You are talking to [My Name]. What can I help you with?”

    Caller: “Hi. It is [Name] from [Retail Store]. There are two guys here and they have a question. You see, they were fighting outside and one of them got so angry that he took the other person’s shoes and put them in the postbox. So, they wonder what we can do?”

    Me: “Excuse me… Did you just say someone put another person’s shoes in the postbox?”

    Caller: “Yeah, I know. I can’t stop laughing. One of the guys’ dads is here and wonders if there is anything we can do?”

    Me: “Yeah. I can send someone out to your store to open the postbox for them. But, since the customer himself has put something in the box that shouldn’t be there, they will be charged. Else they will have to wait till next time the box will be emptied.”

    Caller: “Okay. Wait a second.”

    (The employee gives the information to the customer and comes back to me.)

    Caller: “They say they will wait until Monday for it to get opened. Thank you for your help. Bye!”

    Me: *feeling confused* “Bye…”

    Coworker: “Did I just hear what I thought I heard?”

    Me: “Yep…”

    There’s No Sugar-Coating Some Stupidity

    | San Antonio, TX, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Theme Of The Month

    (I work in a cafe and bar that is attached to a movie theater. On this evening, we are somewhat slammed due to a highly anticipated movie release. While I am working the bar I overhear a conversation.)

    Customer #1: “I need to return these fries.”

    Coworker #1: “Of course. What was wrong with them, ma’am?

    Customer #1: “There’s too much sugar!”

    (Both of my co-workers just stare blankly for a few seconds.)

    Coworker #2: “Did you mean, there’s too much salt?”

    Customer #1: “No! Sugar! There’s too much sugar on these fries! I want salt!”

    Coworker #1: “Let me replace your order for you, ma’am…”

    (At this point, many of the customers at the bar and I are struggling to not laugh out loud. While my coworker tries to explain to the cooks exactly what’s going on, the customer moves out of the way for the person next-in-line.)

    Customer #2: *sarcastically* “I want an order of your fries, and, for the love of all that is good: No. Sugar. Please. No. Sugar!”

    (Many of the customers lose it at this point. All of a sudden, we hear a cook scream out to our waitresses.)

    Cook: “We don’t even have sugar in the kitchen! Why would we have sugar?! Nothing we make has sugar! On top of that, WHO PUTS SUGAR ON FRIES?!”

    (I couldn’t get my fist in my mouth in time to stop my laughter. The best part was, the customer in question never even noticed any of this happening!)

    Self Checkout Is Soul Destroying

    | MI, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Technology, Top

    (I am working the control center for the self checkouts when I overhear a customer having a conversation with the self checkout machine.)

    Self Checkout: “Are you using your own bags?”

    Customer: “NO. I’M USING THE SOULS OF SMALL CHILDREN. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THAT?!”

    Self Checkout: “Please place the item in the bagging area.”

    The Very Picture Of Ignorance

    | USA | Bizarre, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

    (My mother’s never worked in customer service, so she is sometimes rude without meaning to. She has a photography hobby, and lately she’s been taking pictures of people without asking first. We’re at the drive thru getting food when she suddenly pulls out her camera.)

    Me: “Mom, don’t—”

    Mom: *click*

    Cashier: *blinded by the flash*

    Me: *to cashier* “Um, I’m sorry about that. Mom, you’re supposed to ask first, not just take a picture!”

    Mom: “It’s okay. People love to get pictures taken of them! I’m like a paparazzi! They feel like celebs!”

    Me: “No, they don’t. It’s rude!”

    Cashier: *rubbing eyes* “Here’s your food.” *hands over food*

    (My mom drove off without an apology and I saw, in the rearview mirror, the poor cashier still rubbing his eyes. Sorry, poor cashier!)

    Working A Double

    | Stuart, FL, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Funny Names, Technology, Top

    (I work as a sales associate for an electronics store in a mall. Another sales associate gets a new job and peacefully quits this job, leaving his name badge behind. A couple days later, just for fun, I put his name badge on and begin helping customers normally. My manager gets a chuckle out of this, but lets me continue. Over time, I forget I have the wrong name badge on. The next day, a customer comes in that I talked to the previous day. I approach her wearing my name badge.)

    Me: “Hello. Welcome to [Electronics Store]. How can I help you?”

    Customer: “I was talking with [Former Employee] yesterday and I would like to get more information on a product before I buy it. Is he in?”

    (I look over at my manager standing at the end of the counter. He is listening to the exchange and looks back at me with wide eyes. I give him a smile.)

    Me: “Sure! I’ll go get him.”

    (I go to the office. I put on the former employee’s name badge, then go back to the sales floor.)

    Me: “Welcome back, ma’am! How can I help you?”

    (The customer begins asking me questions about a product as if I was a different person. I try to keep a straight face while my manager, now hunched over the counter, is erupting in laughter. Eventually, I answer all the customer’s questions. She buys the product and leaves, not once realizing I am the same person.)

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