Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • De-Engineering Stereotypes
    (1,857 thumbs up)
  • September Theme Of The Month: Return Of The Geeks!
    Submit your story today!

    Category: Bizarre

    For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

    Take Note And Buy A Pen

    | Brooklyn, NY, USA | Bizarre, Extra Stupid

    (I answer the phone.)

    Me: “[Store]. Hello?”

    Customer: “Hi.I need the number for [Company] support.”

    Me: “Okay, do you have a pen ready?”

    Customer: “Yes.”

    Me: “Okay, here’s the number. [Number].”

    Customer: “Could you repeat that?”

    Me: “Sure.” *repeats number*

    Customer: “D***. One more time, please?”

    Me: *repeats number*

    Customer: “D*** it!”

    Me: “Can you not hear me or something?”

    Customer: “I can hear you. I just don’t have a pen and paper. I was trying to memorize the number.”

    A Hit Of Caffeine

    | CA, USA | Bizarre, Wild & Unruly

    (The bakery closes at two pm every Sunday. I am out on the patio about an hour after closing, sweeping and stacking furniture. A middle-aged customer and her elderly mother approach.)

    Daughter: “Oh, hi! We’d like to get some coffee, please.”

    Me: “Oh, I’m sorry, but the coffee’s all gone now. We’re closed.”

    Daughter: “You are?”

    Me: “Yes. I’m afraid we close at two on Sundays.”

    Mother: “Oh, you bad girl!”

    (The customer proceeds to hit me with her rolled up newspaper, leaving me speechless!)

    A Very Close Knit Community

    | USA | Awesome Customers, Bizarre, Holidays

    (Occasionally customers bring in presents for the staff to show their appreciation. Normally it is cookies or flowers from their yards. Some of the newer staff are still getting used to this generosity. One afternoon in mid-November a woman brings in something different.)

    Customer: “Pick one.” *lifts a a large, clear garbage bag full of brightly colored knit scarves onto the counter*

    Me: “Oh, wow. What is the occasion?”

    Customer: “It’s the holidays! I made all of these and I want to share them!”

    Me: “Are you sure? That’s very thoughtful! You’re a much more prolific knitter than I am.” *carefully removes a scarf from the bag*

    Customer: *quickly moves to my coworker at an adjacent desk* “Here! Pick one! Merry Christmas!”

    Coworker: *looks up startled*

    (I shrug, smile, and go into the work room to tell the other staff what is going on.)

    Coworker: “Thank you. That’s very sweet.” *gingerly picks a scarf*

    (The customer manages to find every staff member in the building and give them a scarf. She leaves immediately afterward.)

    Coworker: “So, uh, do you guys all know her? Does she do this every year?”

    Me: “I have… never seen that woman before in my life.”

    Smelly Cat Lady, Smelly Cat Lady, What Are They Feeding You

    | UK | At The Checkout, Awesome Workers, Bizarre, Health & Body

    (It is a Tuesday late night, which everyone dreads, because of the infamous ‘Cat Lady’. She is a very lovely, quiet, but friendly lady but has one of the least pleasant aromas that I have ever experienced.)

    Manager: *to Cat Lady* “Ma’am, I am just about to close. Please, can you go down to [My Name]’s checkout.”

    (Cat Lady nods and smiles, and goes down my checkout. She places her few items on the conveyer belt and I can already start to smell her as she comes up to me.)

    Me: *under my breath* “Oh my god, [Manager]. I can’t believe you did that!”

    Manager: “Just wait, okay?”

    (Cat Lady is about to reach me. Just as she does, my manager grabs a pot of fresh basil that had been left earlier that day and thrusts it into my face.)

    Manager: “[My Name], smell this basil! It’s such a nice smell!

    Cat Lady: “Wow, it’s so nice that you all appreciate the produce here!”

    Wiggled Out Of That One

    | West Chester, PA, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre

    (I am the stupid customer in this one. I have just bought a wig from a friend for a costume I am working on and am wearing it to break it in and get used to the feel. I am also wearing contacts, but keep my glasses in my pocket in case the contacts begin to irritate me. I go to a local corner store for a pack of cigarettes.)

    Cashier: “May I see your ID?”

    Me: (*gives ID*)

    Cashier: “…um. Sir, this isn’t you.”

    Me: “What do you mean it’s– Oh, s***. One moment.”

    (I remove the wig and put on my glasses.)

    Me: “Better?”

    Cashier: (*confused*) “I, um… Sure, that’s a match.”

    Page 37/134First...3536373839...Last