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    Category: Bizarre

    For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

    Self Checkout Is Soul Destroying

    | MI, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Technology, Top

    (I am working the control center for the self checkouts when I overhear a customer having a conversation with the self checkout machine.)

    Self Checkout: “Are you using your own bags?”

    Customer: “NO. I’M USING THE SOULS OF SMALL CHILDREN. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THAT?!”

    Self Checkout: “Please place the item in the bagging area.”

    The Very Picture Of Ignorance

    | USA | Bizarre, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

    (My mother’s never worked in customer service, so she is sometimes rude without meaning to. She has a photography hobby, and lately she’s been taking pictures of people without asking first. We’re at the drive thru getting food when she suddenly pulls out her camera.)

    Me: “Mom, don’t—”

    Mom: *click*

    Cashier: *blinded by the flash*

    Me: *to cashier* “Um, I’m sorry about that. Mom, you’re supposed to ask first, not just take a picture!”

    Mom: “It’s okay. People love to get pictures taken of them! I’m like a paparazzi! They feel like celebs!”

    Me: “No, they don’t. It’s rude!”

    Cashier: *rubbing eyes* “Here’s your food.” *hands over food*

    (My mom drove off without an apology and I saw, in the rearview mirror, the poor cashier still rubbing his eyes. Sorry, poor cashier!)

    Working A Double

    | Stuart, FL, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Funny Names, Technology, Top

    (I work as a sales associate for an electronics store in a mall. Another sales associate gets a new job and peacefully quits this job, leaving his name badge behind. A couple days later, just for fun, I put his name badge on and begin helping customers normally. My manager gets a chuckle out of this, but lets me continue. Over time, I forget I have the wrong name badge on. The next day, a customer comes in that I talked to the previous day. I approach her wearing my name badge.)

    Me: “Hello. Welcome to [Electronics Store]. How can I help you?”

    Customer: “I was talking with [Former Employee] yesterday and I would like to get more information on a product before I buy it. Is he in?”

    (I look over at my manager standing at the end of the counter. He is listening to the exchange and looks back at me with wide eyes. I give him a smile.)

    Me: “Sure! I’ll go get him.”

    (I go to the office. I put on the former employee’s name badge, then go back to the sales floor.)

    Me: “Welcome back, ma’am! How can I help you?”

    (The customer begins asking me questions about a product as if I was a different person. I try to keep a straight face while my manager, now hunched over the counter, is erupting in laughter. Eventually, I answer all the customer’s questions. She buys the product and leaves, not once realizing I am the same person.)

    A Gross Grocery Error

    | Newark, NJ, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Health & Body

    (The customer in front of me is dropping off a prescription. She’s on her phone.)

    Customer: “…and then can you pick up [Name] from school, or do you want me— Hang on, I’m at the front of the line.” *to pharmacist* “Here’s my prescription, ID, insurance data. Need anything else?”

    Pharmacist: “Just give me a minute to read through this.”

    Customer: *on phone* “So, anyway, about the groceries. Why is taking—”

    Pharmacist: “Excuse me?”

    Customer: “Oh, hang on.” *to pharmacist* “Sorry, I know it’s rude to talk on the phone, but—”

    Pharmacist: “No, no. Your prescription. It says ‘cheese, yogurt, chunky peanut butter.’”

    (There is a pause.)

    Customer: *on phone* “I think I know why it’s taking you so long at the grocery store.”

    Dressing Up The Wrong Tree

    | Portland, OR, USA | Bizarre, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (I am working the fitting room in a clothing store on Christmas Eve. It is pretty dead until a customer walks up to me holding three tree skirts.)

    Customer: “Hi. Can I try these on?”

    Me: “Uh, ma’am, you know those are tree skirts? Right? Those things you put around the bottom of a Christmas tree?”

    Customer: “Oh, I know. I just thought they’d make great Christmas ponchos!”


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