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    Category: Bizarre

    For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

    Hasn’t Got A Printed Leg To Stand On

    | Washington, DC, USA | Bigotry, Bizarre

    (I work at a clothing store that sells ‘club’ clothes and party dresses. I am one of the only white girls that works here.)

    Customer: “Do you work here?”

    Me: “Yeah. What can I help you with?”

    Customer: “Do you know where… Oh, never mind. You probably don’t know.”

    Me: “Uh… I know where mostly everything is. What is it you’re looking for?”

    Customer: “Never mind. I’ll find it myself!”

    (The customer storms off. A few minutes go by, and the customer approaches one of my African-American coworkers.)

    Customer: “Hey, do you have printed leggings?”

    Coworker: “No, we don’t carry those.”

    Customer: “Well, your white coworker told me you have them!”

    Me: “Ma’am, you wouldn’t even let me answer you. I know we don’t have them.”

    Customer: “Ugh, whatever.” *storms out again*

    Me: *to coworker* “What just happened?”

    Coworker: “You just witnessed racism.”

    Hair + Arm = Harem

    | Sacramento, CA, USA | Bizarre, Health & Body, Rude & Risque, Theme Of The Month

    (My uniform exposes my arms that, for a woman, are hairy.)

    Customer: “Wow, you have hairy arms.”

    Me: *embarrassed* “Um, yeah.”

    Customer: “I love women with hairy arms.”

    (He grabs my arm and feels it. I am shocked, and start backing away from him.)

    Customer: “Would you like to join my harem of hairy women?”

    (At that point I abandoned my post and ran to my manager. When we came back the customer was gone.)

    A Slave To Fashion

    | New London, CT, USA | Bizarre, Rude & Risque, Theme Of The Month

    (A male customer in his late 40s comes into the store and asks if we have any dresses. Thinking that he is shopping for someone else, I show him a few dresses.)

    Customer: “Thanks! My name is Bonny.”

    (He starts telling me his life story. After what feels like an age…)

    Customer: “Do you get a lot of cross-dressers in the store?”

    Me: “We get one or two.”

    (I take him to a fitting room so he can try on the dresses.)

    Customer: “I am going to a school to learn how to be a cross-dresser. I have special ‘teachers.’ According to them, I have to call you ‘Mistress.’ And if I am doing anything bad, you have to punish me however you see fit.”

    (I was freaked out. He then came back out to show me his ‘outfit’ that included tights, high heels, a dress, purse, and sparkle jewelry that I had to put on him. After I had to put the necklace and bracelet on him, he then curtsied to me. It was the freakiest thing that happened to me. He also curtsied for my manager and coworker. But he never bought anything; he just wanted to dress up in our clothes.)

    Not Cosplaying Around Any More

    | CO, USA | Bad Behavior, Bizarre, Theme Of The Month

    (I manage to get a job with one of my friends in a gas station on the north end of town, which is where a lot of the weirdest people are. My friend is entirely too trusting, and becomes friends with one of the homeless guys, an older veteran who rarely ever bathes. The guy hangs out with her when she has to work the evening shift by herself. I somehow get talked out of my phone number as well. One day I get a random text. It is a picture of a girl taking a selfie in the bathroom, having just applied makeup and a wig, with a weird border obviously added by a program.)

    Text: “Guess who this is?”

    (I’m confused, because I don’t know who would send me a text like that, so I check the sender. It’s the veteran, and after staring at the picture I realize it’s of my friend cosplaying.)

    Me: “Hey… [Friend]?”

    Friend: “Yeah?”

    Me: “Did you post any cosplaying pics on Facebook recently?”

    Friend: “Oh, yeah. I was working on applying the right amount of makeup to look like [Character] and posted it to get opinions. Why?”

    (I show her the message, and she goes slightly pale)

    Friend: “Who did this?!”

    Me: “[Veteran]. I take it he didn’t ask permission before probably sending this to every contact in his phone?”

    Friend: *even paler* “No.”

    Me: “And I imagine the picture didn’t have this weird border beforehand?”

    Friend: *barely audible* “No.”

    (Fast forward a couple hours, and the veteran drops by.)

    Veteran: “Hey, [Friend]! How you doing?”

    Friend: “Did you send my cosplay picture to all your friends?”

    Veteran: *looking proud of himself* “Yes! I thought it was really pretty!”

    Friend: “All of them?!”

    Veteran: *catching on to her tone* “Uh… yes?”

    (Long story short, he got lectured in the middle of the gas station while other customers looked on. Over the next few days all of his buddies showed up looking for my friend, several of them intoxicated and making not so nice comments about her, before they were kicked out!)

    Not A Fan Of Fairytales

    | Dubbo, NSW, Australia | Bigotry, Bizarre

    (My store has regular dress up days, and today is St Patrick’s Day. I go all out with a green wig, fairy skirt, stockings, and makeup. A male customer in his 60s stops me.)

    Customer: “Why are you green?”

    Me: “I’m a leprechaun!”

    Customer: “You’ll die soon then.”

    Me: “Why?!”

    Customer: “Leprechauns die at the end of the day!”

    Me: “Oh, how about an Irish fairy? Will I last longer then?”

    Customer: “Nah, because I’ll shoot you.”

    Me: “Excuse me?”

    Customer: “I don’t mean real fairies. I mean the gays!”

    Me: “Oh. Well, I’m both, then. Have a nice day!”

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