October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

Category: Bizarre

For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

Live By The Sword And Following A Code(words)

, | Armstrong, BC, Canada | Bizarre

(My coworker goes outside to help some customers on our full-serve pumps, while I stay inside to watch the store. As he walks back in, one customer follows. I recognise him as a regular, and also a bit of an oddball. When they enter, the following conversation ensues.)

Customer: “It was nice talking to you. It was good.”

(He holds out his hand, and my coworker shakes it, somewhat dubiously.)

Coworker: “Yeah, sure.”

Customer: “We’ll meet tomorrow at the same place as usual. Under the bridge.”

(I have no idea what he’s talking about, and it’s clear from his expression that my coworker has no idea either. However, he nods and goes with it.)

Customer: “10 o’clock. Make sure you bring your sword.”

Coworker: “…yeah, for sure.”

(The customer then leaves. As soon as he’s gone, my coworker and I look at each other incredulously.)

Me: “What the f*** was that?”

Coworker: “I have no idea! That was weird. Oh, wait, he’s coming back.”

(Sure enough, the customer is walking back inside.)

Customer: “I’ll need to get a new sword, though. Mine shattered last time. So, yeah I’ll need a new one. See you tomorrow. 10 o’clock.”

Coworker: “Yeah, yeah, sure. See you there.”

Upgraded Complaints

, | MT, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

(I used to work at the local big-name ice cream and burger restaurant eight years ago. The night shift lead is the owner’s son that was just a little runt when I worked there. On this trip through the drive thru I order a small ice cream cone for me and a blended drink for my husband. We get the drink, but while the cashier is taking another order he opens the window:)

Shift Lead: “So, she accidentally made a large cone instead of a small one. Is that still okay?”

Me: *I raise an eyebrow and scoff dramatically* “No! It. Is. Not. Okay! You are giving me more for my money and it’s just unacceptable!”

Shift Lead: *grinning and handing me the cone* “Gosh darn us for giving you a free upgrade, right?”

Me: “Gripe, gripe, gripe. Obligatory threat to complain to your father, young man!”

Shift Lead: *laughing* “Yeah, you have a good night, too!”

Putting Up A Language Barrier

| Houston, TX, USA | Bizarre, Language & Words, Tourists/Travel

(I’m working at an information booth at an international airport. I notice a woman in line scolding her children in Spanish. I myself am Latina. When she comes up to the counter:)

Me: “¿En qué puedo servirle?” *How can I help you?*

Customer: “This is America. Speak English.”

Putting The Poop Into Party Pooper

| Fresno, CA, USA | Bizarre, Family & Kids

(I work in a kind of crazy knick-knack store. We have some odd things and our pen holder is a piece of fake poop. I’m finishing up a lady with her purchase. She’s paid with a card so I ask her to sign.)

Customer: “GIVE ME ANOTHER PEN! That is disgusting and I’m not using it!”

(I hand her a different pen she signs.)

Customer: “Tell the supervisor that I’m not amused and that is completely inappropriate and disgusting!”

Me: “I will pass along the message. Have a nice day.”

(Her grandson turns to me:)

Grandson: “Don’t worry. She’s a party pooper! Party pooper!”

Ignoring The Elephant In The Room

| Corning, NY, USA | Bizarre, Family & Kids, Pets & Animals

(I’m a cashier at a local store. A man and a boy about seven walk in.)

Me: “Did you know you have a sticker of an elephant on your back?”

Customer #1: “Yeah, my son here put something on my back a moment ago before walking in. I thought it was one of those ‘kick me’ signs.”

Me: *laughing* “Nope, just an elephant.”

(Overhearing, another customer walks over:)

Customer #2: “Maybe it’s opening its mouth.”

(Customer #1 gets a very confused look on his face and very slowly turns around, obviously trying to understand what Customer #2 meant, as was I.)

Customer #2: “What?”


Customer #2: “You know, to say ‘kick me?'”

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