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  • Always Time For A Rhyme
    (2,193 thumbs up)
  • Category: Bizarre

    For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

    Weekend Roundup: You Drive Me Crazy

    , , , , | Not Always Right | Bizarre, Roundups

    Your Drive Me Crazy! This week, we share five stories of customers who drive employees nuts—and the brave workers who are driven to serve them just the same!

    1. Drive Hoo:
      Woohoo! Drive-thru customers can really drive you crazy!
    2. Preserving Life, 1-Up At A Time:
      Proof that Pokémon-players take “Gotta Catch ‘Em All” VERY seriously.
    3. Copycats…and Copy Dogs, Copy Sheep…:
      A customer wanting to clone his dog? Just another day at the bookstore!
    4. That Was Random:
      One coffee shop customer takes a random walk on the weird side.
    5. We Can Thank Hollywood And “Hacker” Films For This:
      Tech support can fix your hard drive, but not the car you drive!

    PS #1: check out our new Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news galore!

    PS #2: Read more roundups here!

    Thank You Sir Cussalot

    | Nottingham, UK | Bizarre

    Me: “Hello, you’re through to the benefits department. My name is [name]. How can I help you?”

    Caller: *calmly* “Hi, yeah, I called up a minute ago, but I didn’t have my account details with me.”

    Me: “Okay, well if I could just take your details then please, sir, I’ll pull up your records.”

    Caller: “Sir?! How dare you f***ing call me sir?! I’ve never been so f***ing insulted in my life! Who on earth do you think you are, you f***ing b****?!”

    Completely (Pea)Nuts

    | South Africa | Bizarre

    (I’m working in my office when I hear a loud voice outside. I go to check it out as sometimes interested clients can’t find the office easily. A middle-aged man wearing short shorts and knee high socks walks towards me.)

    Me: “Hi, can I help you? Are you interested in making a booking?”

    Customer: “No, I’m here to sell you a stuffed elephant’s head. I’ve visited this place before, so I thought of you at once.”

    Me: “Uh…thank you, but we don’t have a need for an elephant’s head.”

    Customer: “Yeah, fine. I will drop it off now; please pay cash!”

    Me: “Please don’t drop it off. We don’t want it. It would not match our decor.”

    Customer: “But there’s a lamp on top of it, and the trunk can be used as a fountain. Just buy it! I’m moving and I don’t have the space! I’ll drop it off now.”

    Me: “No, we don’t want it. Please try to sell it to someone else.”

    Customer: “Just buy it! I don’t have the space for it! I can’t believe this! Why would anyone not buy it? Fine! I’ll go somewhere else! I’m never booking here again!” *storms off*

    Dripping With Contradictions

    | Brisbane, Australia | Bizarre, Food & Drink

    Me: “Hi, how are you today?”

    Customer: “Can I ask you a question?”

    Me: “Sure. How can I help you?”

    Customer: “Is there any coffee in a latte?”

    Me: “Yeah, there is. We put two shots of coffee in a tall latte.”

    Customer: “Oh, okay. How about the cappuccino? Does that have coffee?”

    Me: “Yes, sir, there are two shots in the cappuccino as well.”

    Customer: “So, are you SURE there is coffee in a cappuccino? Because I really need coffee!”

    Me: “I can assure you there is coffee in it. I can even give you extra shots of coffee.”

    Customer: “So, there is coffee in it?”

    Me: “Yes, there is coffee in a cappuccino.”

    Customer: “Well, I don’t want coffee! What kind of place is this?!”

    Me: “A…coffee shop?”

    Customer: *leaves in a huff*

    Me: *completely confused*

    Social Insecurity, Part 2

    | USA | Bizarre

    (I am working a counter at a carry-out pizza place when this happens. Note: we use phone numbers to identify orders.)

    Me: “Hi, how can I help you?”

    Customer: “I want to order a pizza to take.”

    Me: “Okay, can I have your phone number please?”

    Customer: “No!”

    Me: “Sorry for having to ask. It’s just what we use to make sure you get the right order.”

    Customer: “No! Hackers and the government are always trying to track me!”

    Me: “It’s fine, sir. I’ll just use our store’s phone number instead.”

    Customer: *calms down* “Alright.”

    (Satisfied, the customer pays and waits in his car for the order. Being nice, I carry it to him.)

    Me: “Here is your order, sir.”

    Customer: “Thank you. Say, can you throw this away for me?” *hands me papers mixed with trash*

    Me: “No problem…”

    (As he drives away, I notice he’s handed me expired car insurance papers and an old bank statement. So much for protecting his identity!)

    Related:
    Social Insecurity

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