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    Category: Bizarre

    For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

    Directionless Call

    | Rockledge, FL, USA | Bizarre

    Me: *answering phone* "How may I direct your call?"

    *silence*

    Me: "Hello?"

    (After repeating this a few times, I hear fumbling on the other end.)

    Caller: "Hello?"

    Me: "Hello, sir. How may I direct your call?"

    Caller: "I’m sorry, you’ve got the wrong number."

    Me: "But…you called me."

    Eating Disorderly

    | Wiltshire, UK | Bizarre, Movies & TV

    (A customer has just purchased some tickets and they’ve just been given their tickets.)

    Customer: “Oh, before I go…if I eat my ticket, can you replace it?”

    Me: “Uh, eat…your ticket?”

    Customer: “Yes, I eat things, I can’t help myself.”

    Me: “If you eat your ticket, then keep your receipt and we’ll be happy to replace your ticket.”

    Customer: “Oh, okay thanks!”

    (The customer walks away and then pauses and comes back to the ticket desk.)

    Customer: “What if I eat my receipt and my ticket?”

    Me: “Please don’t.”

    Customer: “Oh, okay. Thanks!”

    In CyberSpace, No One Can Hear You Scream

    | Oshawa, ON, Canada | Bizarre, Technology

    Me: “Thank you for calling [internet company], you have reached [name]. How can I help?”

    Customer: “The internet isn’t working again!”

    Me: “I’m very sorry to hear that, how long has it not been working?”

    Customer: “Since all the weird lights last night!”

    Me: “Oh okay, well what are the lights on the modem doming now?”

    Customer: “How am I supposed to know, its covered in tinfoil!”

    Me: “Ma’am that a terrible fire hazard! You need to unwrap that now!”

    Customer: “Absolutely not! Its the only way to keep the aliens out! I would rather burn the house down than allow them into my computer!”

    Me: “I’m sorry…aliens?”

    Customer: “Yes, aliens! And those weird lights outside, I told you! That’s why it’s not working!”

    (I hear her handling aluminum foil and a dog barking in the background.)

    Customer: “So are you going to get me a new modem or not?”

    Me: “Certainly, just a moment.”

    Customer: “That’s what I thought! Now hurry up! I need to go rewrap the dog!”

    Maybe He’s A Werewolf

    | Calgary, AB, Canada | Bizarre

    (I work in a shoe store, men’s department.)

    Me: “Good morning, just let me know if you have any questions today.”

    Customer: “Thank you. I am looking for shoes.”

    Me: “Well, you are in the right store. What kind of shoes?”

    Customer: “Shiny grey.”

    Me: “You mean a silver shoe?”

    Customer: “Exactly! But let’s just call it shiny grey.”

    The Spice Girls Have A Lot To Answer For

    | Toronto, ON, Canada | At The Checkout, Bizarre

    (I work in a very small café and there is a line heading out the door. A customer is ordering when a woman comes in and walks up to the front of the line.)

    Male Coworker: “Miss? There is a line.”

    Customer: “Ever heard of ‘ladies first’?”

    Male Coworker: “I understand that, ma’am, but you are also cutting in front of many other women who have been patiently waiting.”

    Customer: “I am a woman. I have rights! I don’t have to listen to you!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I’m afraid he’s right. You do need to go to the end of the line.”

    Customer: *looking disappointed* “But…but…what about girl power?”

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