For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!
Me: “Thank you for calling customer service. My name is [name]. How can I help you today?”
Elderly Customer: “Are you a person? A real live person?”
Me: “Yes ma’am, I certainly am.”
Elderly Customer: “I got a person! I GOT A PERSON! Oh my goodness, I got a real person!”
(I’m opening the store for the day, and an elderly gentleman comes over to me.)
Customer: “Hello!” *looks around for a moment* “Do you have your spoon?”
Me: “I’m sorry?”
Customer: “Your spoon.” *produces a metal spoon from his pocket* “Do you have your spoon?”
Me: “I’m afraid I must have forgotten it.”
Customer: “Well, what will you do if you find some ice cream?”
Me: “I suppose I’ll have to use an ice cream cone instead.”
(Seemingly satisfied and nodding, the man continues on his way.)
Customer: “Excuse me, can you tell me what time the mall closes today?”
Me: “Yeah, seven o’clock, so about five minutes ago.”
Customer: “Okay. And do you know about how long it takes for everyone to evacuate the mall?”
Me: “I–what? Why?”
Customer: “Oh, no reason.”
Customer: “My garbage disposal is clogged up.”
Me: “What is stuck in your garbage disposal?”
Customer: “A crystal ball.”
Me: “A what?”
Customer: “My crystal ball rolled off the counter and fell in my garbage disposal.”
Me: “You didn’t see that coming?”
Me: *answering phone* "How may I direct your call?"
(After repeating this a few times, I hear fumbling on the other end.)
Me: "Hello, sir. How may I direct your call?"
Caller: "I’m sorry, you’ve got the wrong number."
Me: "But…you called me."