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  • May Theme Of The Month: Movie Mayhem!

    Category: Bizarre

    For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

    Drive Through Democracy

    , | TX, USA | Bad Behavior, Bizarre, Politics

    (A customer pulls up to my window, and he looks extremely similar to Bill Clinton.)

    Me: “Has anyone ever told you that you look like Bill Clinton?”

    Customer: “I did NOT have sexual relations with that woman!”

    (The customer then proceeded, in full Clinton style, to light up a joint at my drive-through window.)

    Tree Talk

    | The Philippines | Bizarre

    (I receive a call from a guy who’s calling on behalf of his friend and acting as the account owner. It’s pretty obvious because I can hear the account owner in the background providing his account info.)

    Me: “Hi, my name is [My Name]; may I have your phone number, please?”

    Friend: *whispers* “Dude, what’s your phone number?”

    Account Owner: *from the background* “It’s [number].”

    Friend: “Hi, yes. It’s [number].”

    Me: “Thank you! Now, may I have your name?”

    Friend: *whispers* “Dude, what is the complete name on your account?”

    Account Owner: *from the background* “It’s [Full Name].”

    Friend: “Sure, [Full Name].”

    (The friend kept chatting with the account owner and is no longer paying attention to what I’m asking.)

    Me: “[Name]!”

    Friend: “Oh! I’m sorry about that. Can you please repeat your question?”

    Me: “This is the last time I will ask this question, if I don’t get the answer I will have to disconnect this call! What… is… the.. name… of… the STREEEET… that you grew up on?!”

    Friend: *he is rattled and whispers* “Dude, what’s the name of TREE that you grew up on?”

    Account Owner: *from the background* “What the f***, dude?”

    Friend: “Didn’t you ask for the tree name?”

    Account Owner: *now shouting from the background* “Just what the f*** is your problem with me? Stop messing around! If you wanna play, wait for your turn!”

    Me: *laughing and can barely speak* ” “Uh, sir…”

    Friend: *shaky voice* “What is it you are asking for?”

    Me: “I’m asking for the name of the… name of the…” *mute and laugh* “streeeet, please.”

    Friend: *click*

    Imprisoned By The Name

    | Washington DC, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Criminal/Illegal

    (I work at a call center where we receive in-custody records from county jails and state prisons. Most people who call us or are routed to us by calling the jail think we are the jail they are calling. This call comes in on the DC line.)

    Customer: “Um, hi, yes, I have a friend who is missing, and I want to know if he’s in jail there? His name is [Name]. But he could be in there with the last name [Other Name], too.”

    Me: “Okay, let me take a look.” *runs search* “No, ma’am, there’s no one in the system by either name.”

    Customer: “His name has to come up to for him to be in jail there, right?”

    Me: “…that’s correct, ma’am.”

    Can’t Hold A Finger To His Complacency

    | NY, USA | Bizarre, Health & Body

    (I am in the waiting room at an urgent care facility. A young man in his 20s walks up to the receptionist, a bloody paper towel around one hand.)

    Receptionist: “Is it still bleeding?”

    Caller: “Yeah. I have it in a bag, see?”

    (He then pulls out a plastic bag from a pocket, with the tip of his finger inside.)

    Receptionist: “You need to go to the ER.”

    Caller: “Aw, man, really?”

    Receptionist: “Um, yes. Yes, you really do.”

    (He only seemed mildly disappointed, but turned and calmly walked out of the office.)

    Just Another Crappy Day At Work

    | Golden, CO, USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink

    (I work in the bakery, and a customer came in with a ‘unique’ request for a birthday cake order.)

    Customer: “…so I need this cake to resemble a big dog turd. Can you guys do that?”

    Me: “Don’t worry, sir; our decorator will make sure your cake looks like crap!”

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