November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Category: Bizarre

For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

Trying To Break Breakfast

| USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink, Hotels & Lodging

(I work the very early morning shift. Breakfast time is not for another three hours, so I take a bagel and stick it in the toaster for my breakfast. Then I go to the back to cook. When I return, my bagel is gone and there a young man in his 20s with crumbs all over his smiling mouth.)

Young Man: “Hello!”

Me: “Good morning.” *looking everywhere* “Where is my bagel?”

Young Man: “Oh, I ate it.”

Me: “…”

(I’m struggling to keep my temper at someone who might be staying as a guest, so I can’t talk for a few moments. Meanwhile the man keeps smiling foolishly.)

Me: “I see… Do you always eat food that isn’t yours? That was my bagel.”

Young Man: “Oh! Sorry! I didn’t know it was yours. I just thought someone had left and forgotten about it. I’m really sorry.”

Me: “Ok… I accept.”

(I continue my job.)

Young Man: “Can I have another?”

Me: “No… breakfast isn’t until three hours. You’ll have to wait.”

Young Man: “This is about me eating your bagel, right? I already said sorry. Now please, I want another! I can’t help it. I’m hungry!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I have to follow the rules. And they say no breakfast served until [time].”

(He continued to pester me, both pleading and apologizing, until he finally stormed off. Turned out, he wasn’t even staying there as a guest!)

You Gave Me Tuna Much

| PA, USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink

Coworker: *to Manager* “We just got a customer complaint. He said we put two scoops of tuna on his sandwich instead of one.”

Me: “That’s the first time I’ve ever heard of a customer complaining because they got extra!”

Manager: “I know, really!”

Very Grim Job Prospects

| CT, USA | Bizarre, Family & Kids, Theme Of The Month

(I work retail and overhear a mother and child.)

Child: “Is that a scythe?”

Me: “Yes, it is.”

Child: “Mom, can I have it?”

Mother: “Why?”

Child: “So I can reap souls.”

Me: “Wait, what?”

Child: “I want to be the Grim Reaper by the time I’m 15, and then retire by the age of 30.”

Me: “She’s joking, right?”

Mother: “No…”

Blow The Lid Off

, | MI, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(I am covering drive-thru on my own for a little bit, due to extreme traffic at our front counter. I take a woman’s order, make her drink, and cash her out. When handing the coffee to a customer, I hold it on the top so they can get a grip on the cup itself. It makes it a lot easier for the customer, and it means that our hands don’t touch and cross-contaminate.)

Me: *hands the woman her coffee* “Have a—”

Woman: *glares at me* “You touched the lid. You can never touch my coffee lid.”

(I made her coffee. Which includes putting the lid on, and writing how much cream and sugar I put in it.)

Me: *too puzzled to speak*

Woman: “You can never touch my coffee lid. Now I need a new one. DOMED.”

(I grab her a different lid (my hand touches it, and it doesn’t bother her), and pass it out to her. She tsks at me, and drives off, repeating ‘You don’t ever touch my lid.’ She’s a regular customer, and she does this to everyone.)

Just A Normal Day In The Republic

| Poutlney, Vermont, USA | Bizarre, Politics, Religion

(I’m at the register when an older gentleman wearing an USMC cap walks briskly into the store. He asks if we still have our jumbo-sized eggs. I tell him yes and point him in the direction. The conversation happens while I’m cashing him out.)

Customer: “Do you have children?”

Me: “No, I do not.”

Customer: “Are you married?”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer: “Good. When you decide to have children, take it slow. Make sure you do it right.”

Me: “Okay… I will…?”

Customer: “What does your husband do?”

Me: “He works here in the store.”

Customer: “Oh, good. In the meantime, make sure he’s baptized and votes Republican. Have a good day now.”

Me: “You, too…” *to myself after customer walks out the door* “Did that really just happen?”